Laughing At Nemesis

Reditio Soteri -12-

2007-08-11T16:31:00.000-07:00

Monday morning, Bruce dressed quickly and hurried to school, sensing that this would be another difficult day. He was correct, but in a way he did not expect. Waiting for him at the door was the Assistant Principal, Mister Garrett. Garrett was ‘old school’, which for him meant that no one was ever completely innocent, so that if something happened involving Bruce, he must – it seemed – have had something to do with it.

“Mister Decus”, snarled Mr. Garrett. “What - dare I inquire – were you doing Friday after school in my halls?”

“Nothing”, murmured Bruce, knowing no one would buy it but unwilling to tell the fabulous truth. “I just went home”.

“Just went home?” sneered Garrett, disbelief written on his face. “After attacking three of my students with whatever animal you brought – what was that thing, anyway?”

“What animal?” asked Bruce, trying to keep his face blank.

“What animal?” repeated Garrett. “What, you have more than one animal that leaves bloody trails, chews through steel chains, and scares policemen?”

“Huh?” was all Bruce could think to say.

“My office, right after first period”, directed Garrett. “Your memory better get more complete, mister.”

Reditio Soteri -11-

2007-08-10T07:20:00.001-07:00

The watcher returned to the city and again found himself across the street from Bruce’s apartment. Once he returned to a physical form, the pains returned, a reminder of the power of his enemies. The watcher had been careful to avoid churches as he came back; he could not be sure where more of the hounds might be, and as much as he hated the hounds, he had no desire to meet them on their turf and terms.

At least the killing was easy and fast in this place, thought the watcher to himself. Strange, how so often those who thought themselves strong and fearsome, were never ready to face something stronger and more fierce than themselves. The watcher prided himself, that at the least he knew his limitations and watched his course when in his enemies’ place of power. It some ways, it was his own fault, watching for pretty sights and hoping for the old blessing – the watcher knew well those days were long gone, as far lost as his old allotted place at the beginning.

The watcher sighed to himself wistfully, then shook off his despair. What’s done is done after all, he told himself, and anyway there’s work here to do. The watcher licked blood of his forepaws and focused on the apartment across the street, determined and calm.

Reditio Soteri -10-

2007-08-10T07:19:00.000-07:00

At the apartment that evening, Bruce and Stevie were preparing for the next day. In Stevie’s case, that meant a book report for reading, and rehearsal of basic multiplication. For Bruce, that meant Algebra homework and Literature. This would not be bad on a normal night, but Bruce’s mom was determined to have Bruce memorize the Bible, apparently by the end of this week. As he plowed through the riveting plot in the book of ‘Numbers’, Bruce also wondered how he would face the bullies who had locked him up on Friday. Bruce was sure they would not be pleased he had gotten free and spent the weekend at home.

After finishing his assigned reading, Bruce again was allowed to read a part of the Bible of his own choice, and again he let the book open itself, hoping for a nice Psalm or Proverb, but instead the book fell open to an early part, to Genesis 14:10 –

Now the Valley of Siddim was full of tar pits, and when the kings of Sodom and Gomorrah fled, some of the men fell into them and the rest fled to the hills.

This passage did nothing for Bruce, so he again set the book on its spine and let it fall open. Again, the Bible most unnaturally ignored the middle sections, and fell open to Deuteronomy 7:10 –

those who hate Him He will repay to their face by destruction; He will not be slow to repay to their face those who hate Him.

A bit vengeful, that seemed, though Bruce felt he could identify with that up to a point. Once again, Bruce set up the Bible, and this time it fell open to Psalms 55:13 –

But it is you, a man like myself, my companion, my close friend,

An odd verse thought Bruce, especially in the context of betrayal by a friend – one nice thing about not having any real friends, was that the friends you did not have, would not desert you.

Bruce put away the Bible, kissed his mom goodnight, and went to sleep. He did not sleep well, but dreamed of violence and pain.

Reditio Soteri -09-

2007-08-10T07:18:00.002-07:00

The hounds landed immediately, flanking the watcher like a pair of police officers. They could be taken for collies, if it weren’t for their exceptional size, obvious intelligence, and a most-uncollie-like aggressiveness and predatorial inclinations. They took up positions to either side of the watcher, close enough for him to see the size of their clean, white, sharp teeth. For a moment, the watcher was struck with the sense that these hounds must floss – their teeth were perfect. Without thinking, the words came out:

“Wow, nice work. Who’s your orthodontist?”

Compliments about dental hygiene, it turned out, did not improve the mood. The one to the watcher’s left stepped forward, pushing the watcher back a step as he demanded,

“You were at the church. You. What were your intentions, imp?”

“Hey, the sign said ‘all are welcome’ “ replied the watcher, “Perhaps they should be more specific in – oof!”

The second hound had kicked the watcher hard in the chest. He glared down at the supine watcher, who knew he had to be silent and still.

“You,” began the hound, “You are not welcome. You know this. What were you planning?”

The watcher remained silent.

“Answer me!” demanded the second hound, while the first peered intently at the watcher, as if he was trying to read his mind.

“Say ‘please’, first” replied the watcher. For this, he was punched hard in the flank, and as he skidded across the grass and careened off one tree into the trunk of another one, the watcher wondered just how a dog, even one from Heaven, could throw a punch. The watcher never saw it coming.

“Ow” said the watcher.

“Again, vermin” said the second dog, as the first hung back, “what are your intentions?”

“You’d better answer,” said the first hound, “I think he’s enjoying this, and we’ve got all day.”

Swell, thought the watcher to himself, I’ve got hounds from heaven playing out a bad scene from ‘Starsky & Hutch’. Good dog,/bad dog, even. For crying out loud, where’s Lassie to show these guys some manners?

“Uhhhh, they had free chicken?” suggested the watcher. He expected the kick that came, but it still hurt a lot more than he expected.

Things went that way for a long time, the watcher lost track of just how long, and somewhere along the way he lost consciousness. He came to some time after sundown, sore all over and with nothing for his pains but a warning that he would get more if he was seen around a church again.

The watcher shook himself, considered his position and options, and with a movement vaporized his material form and flew through the air back towards town. He needed to hunt, to take his mind off the way his day had gone. Something needed to die to make him feel better, and if he couldn’t kill something from Heaven, something on Earth would have to do.

Reditio Soteri -08-

2007-08-10T07:18:00.001-07:00

The watcher raced through the city streets, but he already knew the run was hopeless; the Hounds always found their quarry. Even so, he needed time to think up something for his defense, because while they were relentless in their pursuit, the Hounds would always listen to a plea. The watcher wasn’t sure if they were pursuing him in the belief that he represented a threat, or whether it was just long habit. For now, it hardly mattered.

The watcher had initially tried to run with speed appropriate for the form he held, but as the hounds gained steadily he gave that up for something faster, and pelted off the side of a building into the air, shooting like a rocket. The hounds made a similar movement, yet managed to retain most of their form, which the watcher felt was just a bit unfair, but he was hardly able to argue the point to anyone.

The watcher gained speed, shooting skyward and desperate to put distance between him and his pursuers, as his mind raced to come up with something to keep him from suffering once the hounds caught up, as they inevitably must. Of its own whim, the watcher’s mind pondered whether the chase would show up on radar, and if so whether he was going to mess with someone’s flight patterns. Oh well, he thought, he wasn’t trying to cause trouble on that point, but there was nothing he could do if that was the case, and worrying about being taken for a UFO was not going to tell him how to keep from getting thrashed by those hounds.

The watcher dived suddenly down through a thunderhead, hoping the hounds were depending on sight and might lose him for a while in the cloud cover. As he saw them shoot away, ahead and above him, the watcher thrilled with delight, but when they banked around and came back down after him, he knew it was no use. The chase was just wearing him out, and he couldn’t think straight while flying, anyway. The watcher looked down and chose a remote wooded area for the meeting, wondering how badly he would get hurt.

Reditio Soteri -07-

2007-08-10T07:17:00.002-07:00

Bruce had come to regard church-going as a waste of time, something he had in general commonality with his watcher across the street. His mother and brother, on the other hand, took strength from church, and their life energy was restored by the predictable traditions and doctrinal banality of the RBCR and Reverend Sheely.

Ezekiel Sheely was not your normal minister. His grasp of doctrine tended to suit his personal mood, but what made Sheely more unusual, was his sense of pastorship. Sheely considered himself very much the shepherd of his flock, and he took quite seriously his duty to meet their needs and concerns. And nowhere was this character more in evidence, than when Pastor Sheely convened the prayer circle after the mid-day meal on Sunday. Sheely passed around a list of the community members who had prayer needs, names a brief request for reference. There was a brief silence as everyone prepared their spirit for the prayer, and speaking for the group, Pastor Sheely opened the channel and prayed out loud to God:

”Holy Father, we come to you in the Name of Jesus Christ our Lord in praise, in reverence, and in supplication, for these our brothers and sisters …”

Across the street, the watcher sensed the essence of the prayer going up, for it was strong. The watcher considered the prayer critically, and approved – it was a good prayer, strong and selfless. A nice mix of humility and love, adoration and confidence in the God to whom they prayed. The unity of spirit added to its strength and clarity, thought the watcher, this one was really quite unusual, not even a hint of a single selfish request in it from any of the supplicants; you didn’t see that very often, especially in these large American cities. Yes, the watcher was sure, this one would get a clear answer, and soon.

He was right; almost immediately the place began to change, the air becoming fresher and the mood subtly altered becoming, well, cleaner - the watcher was amused to notice that even those people driving cars through the area were suddenly more careful drivers and more courteous. The watcher waited with eager anticipation for the next part.

And it came directly, a strong atmosphere of love and joy and belonging, the very family of God affirming the authenticity of the believers’ identity as children of the Most High God. The watcher sensed this with a wistful awe; so long, it had been so very long since he had been privileged to experience the pleasure of God, even in this extended way, to sense the approval of the Lord and to know that you were wanted. It was something truly wonderful, and only the Lord’s children knew it regularly. Them and – the watcher suddenly froze, then ran from the church with all his speed. What a fool he was! Prayers were always heard by God, and always answered, but not only were such prayers as this answered quickly and boldly, the Lord tended to send ministering angels to carry out His Will. And that meant the possibility of other Guardians, as well, who would search out those like the watcher, and they would surely find him for hanging about the church, and might well consider him a threat. His only hope was that they would not see him, a desperate hope with no real chance.

The watcher was right. Even as he turned to flee there came from the clouds two Guardians, fierce and vigilant, who noted the watcher and set after him. The watcher was pursued from the church by two Hounds of Heaven.

Reditio Soteri -06-

2007-08-10T07:17:00.001-07:00

Bruce woke up early Sunday morning. Then again, he always woke up early on Sunday, because his mom and Stevie would never let him miss church.

Church for Bruce was an all-day affair at the Reformed Baptist Church of the Redeemed, which was a long way of saying the ministers were a bit different from anything you normally connected with a church. Well, they dressed the part, with fine suits and styled hair, and they talked the talk, with lots of emphasis whenever Jesus was mentioned, as if they went into mild delirium every time the Savior was mentioned – and they mentioned Him a lot. Jesus was summoned to pass blessing on pronouncements of every conceivable sort, from baptisms and confessions, to upcoming elections (which it seemed was the Devil trying to destroy the world by getting his minions elected, usually characters whose style of dress and speech was suspiciously similar to the good reverends), to corporations and evil forces luring around every corner. Bruce sometimes wondered if the church should stick the word ‘paranoid’ in its name somewhere.

He didn’t do well in the sword drills. Despite his mom’s confidence that it would be Deuteronomy this week, the class worked on 2nd Timothy. Stevie teased Bruce about it all day afterwards.

Lunch was chicken and salad. It was always chicken and salad et the Reformed Baptist Church of the Redeemed; maybe that thing Jesus did with the loaves and fishes in Israel, this church had worked out with old chicken and limp salad.

Bruce didn’t see much purpose in going to church all day on Sunday, but Stevie loved it, and it seemed to be the one thing his mom could depend on, so he toughed it out, even the mix of church ladies who either considered him an angel if he would just not talk so much, or a future hoodlum who needed a beating to get him set straight. That second group always included several of Bruce’s teachers.

Across the street from the church, the watcher peered intently at the congregation, as he nibbled on the body of a stray cat, taking care that the remains would look like the work of a dog.

Reditio Soteri -05-

2007-08-10T07:16:00.002-07:00

Bruce woke up with a strange buzzing sound in his ears, and a feeling of unexplained guilt. Over by the window, he saw Stevie drawing.

“Sup, little man?” he asked.

“K”, answered Stevie, his attention focused on the strange dog he was drawing. Well, a dog or a pig or a well-fed ferret, Bruce couldn’t tell, but Stevie was working hard at it. Seemed like it was laughing at something. Maybe that meant Stevie was happy.

Bruce went to the kitchen, where his mom had left a note. She’d gone off to work, but left breakfast in the oven for Bruce and Stevie, along with a list of chores for Bruce to do. Bruce sighed, and started on the laundry.

As the laundry was going in the washer, Bruce scrubbed at the kitchen floor, wondering – again – how the floor got scuffed and dirty when neither he nor Stevie did anything to mess it up. Strangely, Bruce hardly hurt from yesterday’s beatings; maybe that meant he was getting tougher. And if he got tougher, maybe those jerks would start to leave him alone. Yeah right, and the laundry would start doing itself …

That evening, after his mom got back from work, she set Bruce and Stevie to Bible Study. Tomorrow was Church, and that meant Sword Drills in Sunday School. More Deuteronomy, but after he got his passages memorized, Bruce was allowed to read another part on his own. For some reason, Bruce found himself in the book of Job, and his eyes fell on Chapter 2:1 -

On another day the sons of God came to present themselves before the LORD, and Satan also came with them to present himself before him.

Something about that passage bothered Bruce, and he quickly closed the Bible, almost slamming it shut.

Bruce felt silly about that, and opened up the Bible again. This time it fell open to Numbers 22:26 –

Then the angel of the LORD moved on ahead and stood in a narrow place where there was no room to turn, either to the right or to the left.

Again, Bruce felt a strange forboding and this time he did slam the Bible shut, earning a sharp look from his mother. Embarrassed, he opened the Bible yet again, and – as if someone else was turning the pages, it fell open to Exodus 23:20 –

See, I am sending an angel ahead of you to guard you along the way and to bring you to the place I have prepared

This time, Bruce was strangely reassured, and he closed the Bible one last time for the evening, this time quietly and calmly.

Across the street, the watcher was annoyed. He felt prickly and itchy, as if he had touched something to which he was allergic.

Reditio Soteri -04-

2007-08-10T07:16:00.001-07:00

The watcher sat unmoving across the street from Bruce’s apartment, oblivious to anything else until he sensed that Bruce had gone to sleep. A few moments sufficed to assure the watcher that the immediate area was secure, and the watcher loped off to satisfy a deep need.

The neighborhood was a bad one, so it was only after a few blocks that the watcher found what he wanted. A young man sat at a red light in his car, with the window down. Worse, the man was talking to someone on the phone, and so was paying no attention to his surroundings. But it was not that man who the watcher found interesting. The watcher peered intently at the other young man coming round the car from behind and the side, who raised his pistol and put a shot into the shoulder of the driver, before opening the car door and throwing him to the ground.

Stunned by the surprise and the hot pain in his shoulder and chest, the driver paled in fear as he saw the carjacker aim the pistol in his face to finish the job.

Then the driver saw the gunman stop, stand bolt upright with a look of terror at some unseen monster, then raise the gun to his own head.

Three quick shots, and the gunmen fell to the ground, dead by his own hand. Writhing in his own pain, the driver did not stop to consider how strange it was that the gunman could shoot himself three times in the head.

The watcher smiled grimly at his game, and moved on to find more amusement. Before the sun came up, a would-be rapist would cut off his own genitals before a terrified young woman, a burglar would use the acetelyne torch he carried for breaking into a store on his own face, and an executive who had meant to carry out a perfect embezzlement of his company would wake to suddenly realize that he had instead e-mailed evidence of his plan to the CEO, the local newspaper, and the district attorney.

The watcher settled back to watching Bruce’s apartment with some satisfaction.

Reditio Soteri -03-

2007-08-10T07:15:00.000-07:00

Bruce reached the door to the apartment as his lungs screamed at him to stop. Besides catching his breath, however, Bruce felt he had to stop and think. His mom was going to be furious with him for being so late, and he needed to come up with an excuse, but his mind was blank. Trying to get a sense of the mood, Bruce listened at the door, but all he heard were pots being moved in the kitchen. Suddenly, Bruce steeled his nerve and plunged in, deciding to brave whatever he had to face in the apartment.

But his mom was not home. Instead, Stevie was standing on a stool by the stove, and by the look of things he planned to cook his own dinner, with water heating in two pots and a box of Mac-n-Cheese nearby. Bruce smiled in spite of himself. For a seven-year-old, Stevie had a lot of confidence in his ability.

“Momma’s gonna tan you for turning on the stove, Stevie” said Bruce.

“Nuh uh” retorted Stevie. “Cuz if you tell her I turned on the stove, then I’ll tell her how late you are. Wazzup, anyway?”

“Same o” answered Bruce. “Ight, let’s make a deal. I’ll make you something to eat if you stay away from things that will get us both in trouble. Deal?”

“Deal” smiled Stevie, and he turned on the TV and sat down in front of it.

An hour later, Stevie was fed and washed, and Bruce had cleaned up the table and kitchen. But his mom was still not home, and that was bad. Bruce began to worry.

A while later, Bruce heard a commotion in the hall. It was his mom and someone else, a man, and drunk by the sound of him. His mom was saying something quietly, but with a sense of urgency. Bruce knew from experience not to stick his head out and see what was happening, because this often meant embarrassing his mom, and that always led to whippings for Bruce. A few minutes later, his mother entered, alone.

“Hey, babe” she said to Bruce. “Stevie asleep?”

“Yeah” answered Bruce. “You’re late.”

“I know, sorry” answered his mom. “I got a chance at some overtime, and God knows we need it.”

For some reason, Bruce didn’t want to talk about what had happened at school. Well, it never did any good to complain, and he’d seem like a total wuss if he admit he was freaked out by some strange sounds and a bad smell. So he let his mom take his mind off that by doing a half-hour of Bible Study, which was boring enough to make him sleepy. Bruce suspected his mom used Bible Study to get him to go straight to sleep, which seemed to be what the book of Deuteronomy was made to do.

Bruce fell asleep and dreamed of a cockroach uprising.

Reditio Soteri -02-

2007-08-10T07:09:00.001-07:00

Then there was silence, long enough that Bruce started to think he had imagined the sounds.

Then that skittering came again, approaching the locker like an overgrown cockroach. Bruce heard something sniffing just outside the locker door, and a strong unwashed body odor, but with a sense of rot about it, and Bruce found himself trying hard not to vomit on himself.

Them with a loud clunk, the lock broke, almost as if someone had cut the lock with a bolt cutter. Bruce waited for the door to open, but there was nothing. No sound, no sense of presence, even the bad smell was fading away, like a fart passing through the ventilation system. Bruce pushed gently against the locker door, and it swung open.

Bruce crawled out and peered down the hall in both directions. There was no one there, though where the bullies had run there was a puddle of something on the ground, as if one of them had spilled a thick drink. Bruce stepped that way, careful not to step in the liquid, and he realized that it was blood. Not a huge amount, but more than you’d lose in a nosebleed, or come to that more than Bruce had lost in any of his beatings. Had the bullies turned on each other with something like a knife fight? Or whatever that bad-smelling animal had been, could it have been responsible? Bruce was almost immediately sure that wasn’t it. Whatever that thing was, it seemed small for taking on three apelike brutes. Then again, Bruce wasn’t sure what it was, and the combination of its smell, sounds, and strange behavior creeped him out a lot. The best idea seemed to be to just get out and get home. The halls were dark, dark enough that Bruce realized, with a groan, that he’d be in trouble when he got home. Again. No one ever believed him when he tried to explain what happened, so he’d given up trying to explain. Hanging his head in dismay, Bruce walked to the end of the hall towards the exit. He stopped when he realized that the janitor had already bolted and chained the exit door – Bruce wasn’t getting out this way. And that meant all the other doors were barred, as well. There was bound to be some way out, but Bruce was sure they would involve setting off an alarm or talking to an adult, which meant getting trouble with his mom. Bruce loved his mom, and he knew she worked hard to take care of him and Stevie, but she always got angry when Bruce got in trouble, and like everyone else she never understood it wasn’t his fault. He’d be yelled at and get punished for it, and it was just so wrong.

Bruce didn’t care who saw him now; he fell to the ground and cried.

Time passed, Bruce neither knew nor cared how long, but he started when he smelled it again. That same unwashed-and-rotting smell, and he heard that same skittering sound, coming towards him. Bruce was mildly curious, but at the same time he felt a strong impulse to not be there when whatever it was arrived. Bruce ran for the nearest classroom and threw himself under the teacher’s desk.

Once again, the sound and smell suddenly vanished, and again Bruce began to wonder if he had imagined it. Bruce began to worry that the bad smell was his own body; had he smelled his panic and fear? Bruce resolved to take a shower when he got home.

Then a heavy sound fell in the hallway, something metal. Bruce waited a few minutes, but heard nothing more, and curiosity moved him to see what had happened.

Not only had the chains holding the door shut been chewed into pieces, the push-bar itself lay on the floor, the door slightly open, the night breeze blowing in. Feeling a surge of emotion, a mix of hope and fear, Bruce took his chance and plunged into the night, running the three miles home without once stopping, ignoring the stabbing pain in his side from the lack of oxygen as he ran pell-mell to the only place he considered safe.

Running headlong as he did, Bruce never saw the companion who followed him home, easily keeping pace while remaining just out of sight, setting up camp just across the street from the haggard building Bruce and his family called home.

Reditio Soteri -01-

2007-08-10T07:08:00.001-07:00

Bruce sat quietly inside the locker, hoping his pursuers had lost his trail. As he sat, he reflected on an article he had read somewhere, which claimed that the body did not remember pain. Reflecting on past encounters with these boys who were looking for him, Bruce was pretty sure that the writer of that article did not know what he was talking about.

He had done nothing to get his tormentors angry at him, Bruce was sure. It just seemed that just being there was enough to make him a target – that and the fact that everyone knew Bruce was a perfect victim, he never fought back, not very well at least, and he never told on his attackers. In return, they only bruised him and left him a bit bloody; they had never broken a bone – yet. Musing to himself as he waited, Bruce wondered why they never seemed to change their routine. Surely they would get bored of this?

At that moment, the locker down flew open and Bruce started with the shock of once again being found. The same three brutes who always made sport of his pain leered down at him, and Bruce silently cursed himself for choosing such a vulnerable place to hide. Without a word, but smiling grimly to each other, they set to punching and kicking Bruce, but seemed to tire after only a couple minutes, and they laughed at each other as they slammed the door on Bruce. Bruce could hardly believe his luck. He was hurting, but already the pain was receding a bit, though his mouth was bleeding and his ears rang from blows. Then Bruce heard, with dismay, a padlock being placed on the locker, and the brutes walked away, laughing and clapping at each other, Bruce realized that as this was Friday, he’d likely be locked for days before anyone knew where to find him. Bruce groaned as his attackers walked away, delighted with their cleverness.

As he sat alone in the dark, Bruce felt like he needed to cry, but the tears wouldn’t come. He couldn’t decide if this was because he was afraid the bullies would hear him, or that he was just too used to this treatment for it to have the same pull on his emotions. He was tired, hungry, hurting in various places and furious at himself, yet again, for not doing something to have stopped what happened, not that there was ever much hope of escape, let alone victory.

Then a sound caught his ear.

Long practice at evading his enemies had trained Bruce to keenly sense any sound out of place, and he realized that the three boys who had locked him in the locker had indeed hung around to see how he would deal with the situation. But something has changed. Bruce heard gasps of surprise, yells and a curse, as if they had been attacked by someone or something. There was a yell as in pain, and another curse shouted, and then the unmistakable sound of flight – the brutes had come across something they couldn’t scare or defeat. Bruce was intensely curious to know who or what that was.

Or was he? It suddenly occurred to Bruce, that whatever had chased away the brutes might, in fact, be worse than they were, and in that case it was very bad for Bruce to be locked where he could not get away, as he began to sense might indeed be very necessary.

Whatever it was began to approach the locker. Bruce heard it approach, almost a skittering kind of step, though the steps seemed strangely to grow softer as they came closer.

Then, just outside the locker, something chuckled quietly, as if at some private joke.

Laughing At Nemesis

2004-11-30T15:00:00.000-08:00

A lot of people have strong opinions, on the matter of how God will handle Judgment Day. Among the interesting comments which come up when this topic is raised, is the assumption that this group or that will be in a bad way, because they didn’t sign up with the right group.

I am a fundamentalist Christian (a name which has sparked its own debate, primarily on the lines of whether I get to say what I am, or whether I must cede the name ‘fundamentalist’ to the nether regions of social approbation), which in my small mind means that I hold to certain key definitions and rules when considering God, Jesus Christ, the Holy Spirit, and myself (who does not, of course, belong is such lofty company, but I have a long history of getting into things where I don’t belong). It seems to me, that a simple consideration may illuminate the matter, and I mean to explore this question in this story, named according to my mood and métier.

I also hope to make it entertaining.

Chapter One: Waking Up

2004-11-30T06:28:00.000-08:00

It began with a sense of hope. I felt as though I was waking up, the way you come out of a deep sleep when you are called, not yet able to move, yet slowing realizing where you are and feeling life return to cold limbs. Not comfortable, yet there was purpose and mission, if I couldn't tell yet what those were. As I came to realization, I found myself laying on the ground, which strangely was not as cold as my body. The ground was rough but even, no grass yet not dirty or muddy. Because it felt strange to lie down and be aware, I rose and stood. I found myself standing in a fog, between two places which faintly glowed as cities do from a distance. Somehow, I sensed that one of the two was a welcome place, bright and glad, and the other dark and foreboding, so I walked to the first, drawn by the hope which had revived me from my rest. As I walked, I tried to recall where I had been and what I had been doing. My clothes yielded no clue, just common pants and shirt, socks and shoes, and there was nothing in my pockets. Looking back where I had lain, it was as if I had simply appeared there; there were no signs of anything around me, except for light footprints in the dirt where I walked.

I saw a crowd of people ahead, and I joined them, as they waited expectantly at the high gates surrounding some place too far or too shrouded in mist to see. There was an air of expectation, a mix of happy hope and dread.

Behind me, I heard a distant noise, as of old rusty gates opening, followed by a distant but growing howling, a threat as yet unseen yet recognized by nearly all of us present. I became very anxious that the brighter gates before us should open, before that approaching terror should seize us from behind.

I suddenly recalled the darker warnings of the 25th Chapter of Matthew, as if a portent sent too late. Those who claimed to be Christians, but who had no love for others, especially those who would not do anything to help people in need, or to be gentle when their brother was in pain, or to be kind when explaining something, or otherwise to bear any sort of fruit in true imitation of Christ, are snatched away by the angels, and hurled into a lake of fire in the midst of the pits of Hell. At that moment, something plucked at me, and my heart jumped, but it was just Wohali, pulling my leg. Wohali was an old friend and in another place, I would have begun to catch up on old times and events passed since we last met. Here, I stood silent while Wohali snickered at his jest. I began to notice a few more details in our surroundings.The place where we were was vast. What had seemed to be a park or meadow outside the gates of Heaven, was revealed to be a great plain, with Heaven's gates near to us, and Hell's domain far from us, but faintly visible.At first, I had also thought the terrain was simply empty, but as my eyes adjusted ( to the light, actually), I began to realize that a mist was covering the ground, and was now beginning to recede in some places. I also realized we were not on the Earth. I could see our globe floating off to my left, and even at this great distance, it looked tired and spent. I wondered how it could be restored.

The terror passed in an instant, and when it was gone, so were many who had stood with us, and I realized that my fears were sound, yet I had been spared, if only for the moment. Also, as the mist began to recede, I began to notice other things about this place. First, I was able to recognize people at greater distances, and I was surpised to find some still in our group, whom from my experience I would have expected to be in the joyous company of our Lord Jesus Christ, and others whom I would have thought surely would be regretting their sins as they roasted. I rebuked myself for judging the second group, but all the same, it seemed strange.I also began to see little cracks in the ground, which I was certain had not been there when we arrived. Maybe the weight of 18 Billion people, give or take, was getting to be a problem. I wondered, if we were already dead, would this be something I should worry about? As time passed, further details emerged, some fascinating, others not very encouraging.I had thought, since the frightening angels who had seized the damned (were they through already?), were no longer around us, that the angels were no longer active, but I began to realize that the colorful streaks of light and thunder were not weather, but passing angels, impossibly fast. I confirmed this when one of those bolts of light suddenly appeared at my side, as a smiling man slowly walking, but then he approached Wohali, spoke quietly to him, and without anything more, they turned and left me, but not before Wohali stopped, smiled quirkily and assured me "it'll be alright - really". Then, in a flash, he and the man were gone, and it was only in that instant, that I somehow realized Wohali's angel was Comanche. I puzzled for another while, trying to recall how it was I could tell tribes by sight. I realized as I watched, that everybody seemed to have someone coming to see them, and not everybody was happy with that fact.Then I started suddenly, as I realized another angel was coming, this time to me. I started again, when I realized I knew her.Yes, I knew her. And suddenly, I was afraid, not of danger or some evil, but of how I must seem to her.Because the woman approaching me had been a girl with whom I was once deeply infatuated [note: no real names, just in case some of you are wondering later]. Beth Allison had looked like the perfect girl to me then, and frankly, she still did. It wasn't just the way she looked, but how she acted, always pleasant to everyone, always able to like everybody, to see the good when no one else could. Tall, willowy, always gentle, always kind, she had seemed unattainable when I knew her in school, and my heart did a skip every time I saw that face. I still trembled to see her, but somehow the reason was different now.And as she approached, I suddenly realized that she had been in that first group which had entered Heaven. If she was coming out to see me, I figured I was going to be a real disappointment, which I desperately did not want to be. "Hello Dan" she said, and smiled as if she had been looking forward to meeting me for a long time. In that moment, I wanted to rush up and hug her, but I didn't dare. For one thing, I suddenly realized she had changed from the girl I knew. It's not that Beth was old; somehow, we were all in pretty good condition, though some of the people were children, some adults, and some you just couldn't be sure. Beth had that Audrey-Hepburn purity to her, that added a dimension of charm to any age, but that wasn't it. I suddenly realized, for example, that if I was my normal height, Beth was now a good 6 and a half feet tall! I mean, she had been tall in High School, maybe 5 eleven, but never 6'6"! And she was proportional to her height, like a bigger-than-life scale model. I also realiuzed she was in all-white clothes, but a dazzling white like I couldn't imagine, but there she was. I felt dirty, like my clothes were too old, like I was too... too... too something, but less than acceptable, and it wasn't a good feeling. But Beth took my hand, and we started walking. When we stopped after a few steps, we were in a completely different place, still outside the gates of Heaven, but there were a lot less people.Maybe I'm not as pure as Wohali, because I still wasn't sure things were going to be all right.Beth smiled, grinned actually, and laughed "Oh, it's good to see you again, Dan. Isn't this great?"She must have caught my worries from my look, so she said "OK. I bet you have lots of questions. Go ahead""I'm not in Heaven." I observed. "Does that mean I'm going to Hell?"

"You mean the Lake of Fire? Probably not."I wasn't really comforted by 'probably', so Beth went on.

"Look, Dan. You know we are judged by God alone, and He judges us on one of two measures: Grace or Justice.

"As a Christian, you know that God has chosen to extend His Grace to whom it pleases Him to receive it; that's Pre-Destination, and for all the human arguments, that's always been up to God."

"But" I interrupted her, "If not everyone receives Grace, isn't that unfair?"

Beth shook her head."No, and you should know that, Dan. Nobody deserves Grace, so it's no unfair if you get Justice instead. It's not as if anyone will be punished or rewarded for something they didn't do if they receive Justice from the perfect Lord instead of Grace.

"But you have to think about why someone will not receive Grace." Back in Genesis and Exodus, we see two different Pharoahs, remember? The first Pharoah received God's favor, His Grace if you will, while in Exodus we read that God hardened Pharoah's heart against the Hebrews, so we can say that Pharoah did not receive God's Grace. [ Exodus 4:21 ]

"But notice how Pharoah was, before this happened. He held the Hebrews as slaves for no cause [ Exodus 1:8-11 ], he tried to kill all the male Hebrew infants [ Exodus 1:22 ], and his son was just like him. By the time Moses spoke with God through the Burning Bush, Pharoah had quite made up his mind. God did not harden Pharoah's heart unjustly; Pharoah chose the course, and God simply locked in the direction Pharoah had already decided.

"Compare that to the first Pharoah in Genesis. He cared enough about his people to dream about his responsibility [ Genesis 41:1-8 ], even though he would be fed and comfortable, no matter what happened. He sought an answer, not only to the mystery, but to finding a solution [ Genesis 41:33-40 ] which would take care of his people and reward honest men. So, it is hardly surprising that God looked with favor on Pharoah. On the one hand, yes, Pharoah did not deserve God's Grace to know ahead about the coming famine, or to have a capable, trustworthy man made available to him, but his acts showed his heart. Like the other Pharoah, this Pharoah chose his course, of duty and love, and God encouraged his choice.

"I can't promise you will go to Heaven, Daniel, because I cannot see your heart. You have made your choice by now, and God will have established the consequences according to His wisdom and mercy. I do not condemn you to Hell, for the same reason."I can remind you, however, that God is good, that His will is perfect and shall be done. If you hold to God's will, then everything will be alright."

All this I digested, and Beth sat with me while I tried to find consolation. I believe in Jesus Christ, of course, but when you are up against the matter, it becomes easy to doubt and worry. As I was trying to decide what to say next, a disturbance caught our attention.A group of men had surrounded a pair of young women, and their intent was unpleasantly obvious. Apparently, some people had quickly overcome their awe of angels, especially given the delay in deific presence.I rose to intervene, but Beth grabbed my hand and said, "No, it'll be OK. Wait and see."

I realized pretty soon after that, what she meant. When the men tried to grab the women, their hands passed through the women, as if the girls were only holograms. What's more, when one of them lowered his trousers, the equipment he apparently intended to show off or use, was not there!His resulting scream of fear and embarrassment was the first real comic relief I had enjoyed since arriving, and presently everyone but the attackers was laughing at their inability to do any harm.The men were angry now, and it seemed they hadn't quite caught on that this place had ways to prevent evil, and for a moment my worry returned.But Beth put her fingers to her lips, and blew what I thought was a silent whistle. After a few moments, however, the baying of hounds became clear, and everyone was immediately aware that a pack of dogs was on the way, and space cleared quickly around the men. For an instant, I was concerned about whether the approaching hounds would be able to tell the bad guys from the good ones. I became intently aware that there were no trees available to climb.

Suddenly, there were more than a hundred hounds, big powerful monsters, and they were somehow well aware of who their targets were. The men ran off at top speed, with the canines in pursuit. I glanced at Beth, half expecting a satisfied grin or relaxed relief, but now she seemed concerned, although she had not been worried when the girls seemed in danger. Beth looked over at me, and said,"When they can act like that here, I do wonder how they will give an account of their words and deeds?"

I shrugged. Then a question came to me.

"If we're outside both Heaven and Hell, where are we right now?" She smiled faintly.

"If you were Catholic, I might tell you this is Limbo."But to be serious, this is a sort of way-station.

"As you've noticed, the ground is not really stable here. That's because this place is going away, once everyone has had their judgment. But for now, it's a place for preparation, for waiting, for rest, and for decision."

Chapter Two: Gates

2004-11-29T18:32:00.000-08:00

Beth continued:
"You saw when that villain lowered his pants, he was, well, missing something he expected to still be there. That is just one of the changes here.

"People live their time on Earth, and everybody says this or that isn't really important, but it's so easy to get caught up in things which are not important. People say they don't care about money, but worry all the time about having enough. They say looks don't matter, but people have trashed their marriages and reputations, just to chase a pretty someone. They say everyone is equal and they respect diversity, then surround themselves with people who are just like them, only they make sure that a certain percentage of them say how great they are on a regular basis.

"So they don't like it, when they get to Heaven, and they find out there's no money here, there's no sex, there's no claims that one person is better than another-"

"Wait a minute" I interrupted. Look at you, and look at me. Of course you're better than I am, and God Himself said so. Isn't that right?"

Beth laughed for a long time, and grabbed my arm to calm me down and keep me from stomping off.

"Dan, I'm sorry, I'm not laughing at you. Really. What you see here is how you perceive me, and really, you are controlling that. It's flattering, but it doesn't really change what's so.

"Yes, I've received favor from God, but that makes me fortunate, not better. It may be, that later on you will be as great or greater than I am or will be.

"Besides, look at the angels. There are Cherubim, Seraphim, Guardians, the ArcAngels, all sorts. Do any of them seem unhappy or feel resentful because they are not another sort?

"No, each serves as they were made to be. In fulfillment of God's will, we will be exactly what He means for us to become, and there is very great joy in that.

"Yes, I have been to the King already, and by the Grace of My Lord I have found favor from Him. But look at me closely, and I will show you a secret."

Well, to be honest, looking at Beth had never been something I wanted to avoid, so I looked at her, and after a few seconds, something occurred to me.

I had already known that Beth was especially good with children suffering from Down's Syndrome, but as I watched her, I was now able to feel her joy at meeting each one of them, back when she first began, her compassion for the families, and her determination to make a difference for the better.

Looking deeper, I realized I could explore her life, and I could see all her experiences - except there were places where it seemed something should be there, but instead there was a separation, like a seam between two parts which had been joined together after something between them had been removed. So I asked Beth about those.

She blushed and looked at the ground for an instant.

"Those were my sins, Dan. Jesus removed them, so they are not there anymore, but I have to always remember that those were also places where I could have done the good thing, chosen a better way, but did not."

It shocked me to think that Beth had ever committed any sort of sin, and I almost made a joke about how easy and simple it must have been for Christ to forgive her one or two trivial sins, when the rest of us had done so much, but I caught myself. Whatever Beth had done, it was significant to her.

Then I wondered what she had seen when she looked at me, and I couldn't look her in the face. Beth's reaction suggested she knew my thoughts:

"Don't be afraid, Dan. Because I have been freed from sin, I also do not see yours."

"So," I asked, "I have had a lot of people ask, so I want to know:

"Is forgiveness of sins only from Jesus?"

"Yes, Daniel" answered Beth, "but He makes that forgiveness available to anyone who will accept it."

"You mean everyone will accept Him as Lord, right? So what happens to the non-Christians?" I asked.

Beth shook her head again.

"That depends on what you mean by 'non-Christian'" she said.

"Remember the Bible: "I tell you the truth, all the sins and blasphemies of men will be forgiven them. But whoever blasphemes against the Holy Spirit will never be forgiven; he is guilty of an eternal sin." [ Mark 3:28-29, cf Matthew 12:31, Luke 12:10 ]

"God wants us to live. I mean, think about it. Everybody who is born goes through a long and detailed process for months, and it is difficult and painful for the mother. And even after you are born, your parents have a lot of work and effort to keep you healthy and growing. You only become an adult if you have folks you care about you, and that begins with God.

"Everybody knows John 3:16, but how many people read the line right after it: "For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through Him [ John 3:17 ]."

"OK" I replied, "but it still sounds like you gotta be Christian to enjoy that salvation. I mean, what did Peter mean when he said "Salvation is found in no one else, for there is no other name under Heaven given to men by which we must be saved" [ Acts 4:12 ]?"

"Jesus is our only Savior, Daniel" explained Beth, "but He came to save everyone."

"So now I'm confused again" I said. "We need the Grace of God to enter Heaven, as well as the Salvation from Christ to hope, but if we don't have to be Christian, why worry about it?

"And if we don't need to be Christian, then what are all these evangelists going on about, and why did the disciples make such a big deal about it? Couldn't they have just told everybody 'Don't worry, we'll all be fine'?"

Beth sadly shook her head again.

"There's a lot more than that to it, Daniel" she said. "To begin with, different people have different needs. Some are trying their whole lives to do right, and they need very little poking to want to find God. But others need something to remind them daily, and still others are in very real rebellion against God, and will not turn from their sin, even to save themselves, without something very special presented to them.

"Christ did not die on the cross, because a bloodthirsty god demanded human sacrifice, and would only be satisfied with a divine price. He died because it was necessary, in many respects, for Him to pay that price, for our satisfaction. He died to show He was willing to bear everything we had to bear, that He was fully involved with us, not only to die in payment of our debt, but to be able to show His power, even over the sum total of all sin and death.

"Some even still doubt what he did today, as if resurrection made death by crucifixion a thing of no great pain or loss, as if God somehow deserved to suffer for what we ourselves did.

"So He endured a life of poverty and deprivation, that we would understand the power of humility and a poor spirit.

"He endured persecution for telling the truth, to show us how it was worth doing, even at the cost of your life.

"He endured loss and pain without cause, to show us the courage and valor of those who bear such cost among us.

"And He taught us His way, that we could not only be saved from destruction, but become greater than we imagined possible."

I sat and thought about what Beth said for a while.

"Beth", I finally asked, "Are you saying we are all saved?"

"No, Dan, I am not" replied Beth. "You saw yourself, how some have already been compelled to Hell.

"And there will be more. Many people will refuse to be reconciled with God, for whatever reason.

"Some blame Him for everything they wanted to be different.

"Some rebel against Him, because they want to be their own god.

"Some cannot let go of the things of the old world, even though they are poison to their own soul.
"But God has made provision for anyone who will accept it. God knows what choice we have made, even before we are born, so while it seems strange, unfair even, in truth no one will be judged unfairly here."

Beth got up, and as she walked away, I realized she was leaving me.

"Where are you going, Beth?" I asked.

"It is time for me to go" she answered. "Another is coming."

"But I still have questions. For one thing, where is my wife, Mikki?" I cried to her departing form.

"Don't worry" answered Beth, from what seemed a great distance. "All the questions will be answered, which need one. And your wife is not here, because it is not the time for you to be together again, not yet.

"But don't worry. It will all be all right."

And with that, she disappeared into the mists, which seemed to have risen again.

I stood there alone, wondering about questions I had suddenly thought of, and where the people I knew had gone, and where those dogs might be now.

As I stood there, I became bored, which surprised me a little. I mean, I was standing at the end of the universe, with no confirmation that I would have an existence beyond the next short piece of time, and yet I was bored.

So I took a walk.

At first, I worried about the dogs, or meeting up with a gang or something like that, but after some thought, I decided Beth was right, and whatever was waiting for me in Judgment, a short walk to stretch my legs wasn't going to be a risk.

There were two glows visible in the mist. One was red and the other golden, and it wasn't hard to figure which was which, so I strolled over to the Gates of Heaven to see what was up.
The first thing I noticed, was that there were people trying to climb the fence. Not smart, I concluded, as I observed that every fence pole which had a climber nearby, was increasing in height as the person shimmied up. I quickly realized no one was going to be able to climb over the fence. I also observed that no one was going to dig under it, either. Anyone digging down, simply found that the poles went down farther than they could dig.

Well.

I peered more closely at the Gates themselves. They were open, and while the space was only big enough for a couple people to go through at a time, they were open, and there was nothing like a guard there, so St. Peter, nada.

So, I decided to stroll on in and see what Heaven was like. I figured, if I wasn't supposed to be there, I'd find out soon enough. I walked up casually to the gateway and right on-

I woke up sometime later, flat on my back, the gates some 50 paces ahead of me. They were still open, but something had happened. I thought for a while, and decided I had lacked the element of surprise, so the second time, I walked along the fenceline, nodding to people as I approached the gateway, casually, casually, - NOW-

Again, I woke up sometime later, flat on my back, the gates some 50 paces ahead of me. They were still open, but nobody was going in or out. Obviously, stealth wasn't going to work, so I chewed on the problem for a little while, and then I had another idea.
I walked away from the gates until I was a good 200 feet from them, then tore towards the gates at full speed, hoping that my velocity would-

Once Again, I woke up sometime later, flat on my back, the gates some 50 paces ahead of me. I had learned my lesson by now, and the back of my head was letting me know how foolish I had been.

I decided to be a good little boy, and just lie there for a while.

After some time, I heard a voice call out "Hello, Daniel. I brought you some medicine."

The voice belonged to an old acquaintance of mine, Robert Pallon. But Robert had been a little guy when I knew him, maybe 125 pounds and all of 5'3". This guy, with the same quiet voice, had to be 6'8" and 290. I mean, this guy looked like he could stop Shaq. And he was wearing the uniform of the day, that blinding white suit that looked like Armani got together with Mr. Clean.

"Sorry about the thing with the gates. We didn't realize you would get curious so soon, so we forgot to tell you. How do you feel?"

I began to feel like I was living Dicken's "A Christmas Carol" without a script.

Robert helped me sit up, and produced a small flask. Whatever was in the flask was strong but not unpleasant, sort of like syrup with a kick, like Formula 44 before they took out the chloroform.

I looked over at Robert, who grinned at me. I noticed that although I was dirty from my fall (er, falls) into the dirt, he was still immaculate, even in a white suit. Dirt didn't stick to him! I also noticed he had a small pink carnation stuck in his lapel buttonhole.

"Medicine? I didn't think they had medicine in Heaven."

Robert shrugged.

"They don't need it in Heaven, but you're not the first guy to try to get through the gates like that, and it takes a lot out of you.

"Feel a little better?"

"Yeah" I said and I started brushing dirt off me, as I got up. I also noticed the cracks on the ground had gotten a lot bigger, and not just where I landed; they were more than half an inch wide now. I made a mental note to watch my step, or I could trip.

I cocked my head at Robert.

"So, looking at you, I guess you've been in to see Jesus."

Robert smiled broadly.

"Yes I have, Dan."

"What's He like?" I asked.

"You're the Bible reader, Dan. Don't you know?" asked Robert.

"OK" I said, "So He's big and shiny and very clean. What is He like as a person?

"And why is it every time I see someone who's been in to see the Boss, they're all about 7 feet tall and wearing white?

"Nice carnation, by the way."

"Thanks" replied Robert, "But you should know He's gentle and kind and compassionate. And as for us, well anyone who stands in the presence of God, grows by the experience, and He has removed all our iniquities. Even our appearance is made perfect."

"Uh-huh" I answered.

"So, why is there the big 'Smoking Section' over there?" I asked Robert, pointing my thumb over at the distant red glow as I shook dirt out of my sneakers.

"It seems like not everybody enjoyed their little visit to the King."

Robert chuckled for a moment, then put his hand on my shoulder.

"I think I see the problem, Dan." said Robert. "Let's go to Hell and see for ourselves, OK?"

He laughed as I pulled away from him at that suggestion.

"It's OK, Dan, nobody gets sent to Hell just for taking a look." explained Robert. "Besides, I believe you have questions I can answer while we walk."

So, in a move I could only consider as foolish as anything I had ever done in my life, we turned and walked away from the promise of Heaven, heading towards the angry wrath of Hell.

Robert chuckled as we plodded along.

"So, what's on your mind?" he asked.

"OK, for starters, why are we going to Hell?"

"Well, Dan" answered Robert, "You asked who was going to Hell, and I can just see in your eyes, you're concerned about someone you know and love ending up there. I could just tell you it's all going to be fine, but even if you believed it, it wouldn't really tell you what's going on, which is your real worry, right?"

I stopped and looked at Robert for a while. He stood there, a faint smile on his lips, but patient.

"Ok, Robert" I said. "I talked with another friend of mine a while back, and her answers were kind of hard to make sense of. Are you going to tell me straight?"

"I'll do my best, Dan" answered Robert.

"OK" I replied. "So, first thing: I thought everybody was going to get judged at the same time, but all I've seen are the first-teamers like you, and the guys who are probably doing great impressions of charcoal bricquets right now.

"Why didn't everybody get judged?"

"They will, Dan" answered Robert, "But not everybody is ready yet. In fact, some won't be ready for a long time.
"Have you ever heard of the Millenium?"

"Sure" I answered, "That's where Jesus reigns on Earth for a thousand years, and it's all good, and then Satan is released for a little while to trick a few, and then it's all over for Earth as we know her."

"Well, that's partly right" said Robert, "You see, lots of Christians read bout ruling with Christ, but I wonder if they have ever thought about who will reign, and over whom? And why?
"In Heaven, God reigns, so it's very clear. Why would a human reign, when God could? It's not about ego, or God forgetting, or anything most people have thought about. You know that Jesus accomplished Salvation for everyone, right?"

"Of course" I answered immediately.

"And you know that everyone must accept Christ to be saved, right?" asked Robert.

"Yes, but -" I said

"But what?" asked Robert

"That messes with my head" I said. "First I hear how everybody is saved by Christ, now I hear how you have to accept Him. I heard all my life how that made Him sound petty, and I think I understand. I mean, what about the people who grew up before Christ? What about the people who grew up in a part of the world where Christianity is suppressed? What about the people who only knew the false Christ taught by liars and money-hungry false prophets?"

Robert smiled again, and shook his head. "Dan, you know God is good, don't you? That He is just, that He has a plan for each and every one of us, do you know that?"

He paused as I just nodded.

"Fine. So you also know, He has provided the way for everyone who will take it. And part of that is the Millenium. The chance to see God as He is, to know Christians without fakery or false illusions, like pride or greed or lust to foul the picture.

"Everyone will be able to choose mercy or justice, as they will."

Chapter Three: Decisions

2004-11-29T07:17:00.000-08:00

“But what about the non-Christians?” I pressed. “How can a Muslim or a Sikh, or a Pagan or a Hindu properly choose after a lifetime of the world they knew?”

Robert laughed.

“Look, Dan.” he said. “All the people you saw so far, have you seen any who was Jewish, or Muslim, or Hindu, or Pagan, or Sikh?
“Everyone will be judged properly. Do you think God is a trickster, that He would allow Satan to take away His loved ones? I mean, even the animals will be judged according to the plan He has for them.”

“So every road leads to God, after all?” I asked. “Or are you saying that we will all be segregated? Hey, I have friends who aren’t Christian, you know!”

“No, Dan, not every road leads to God, and they all have to go through Jesus Christ.

“But when you see them again, and you will, understanding will also be there for you to find.”

Robert smiled and waved me to follow. I muttered to myself as we set out, “Suuuure, real plain and straight!”

But I watched the Earth as we walked, and I began to notice a shiny lump on it, and I added it to my long list of things to ask about.But for now, we were getting closer to Hell, or Milwaukee. I could tell by the smell.

I wanted to know more about what Robert meant about being judged “properly”, so I asked

“Robert, you still haven’t explained how it’s just for people who never knew Christ, to be judged by Him”

“Well, Dan” answered Robert, ”What do you think Judgment is for?
“God doesn’t need anything to be holy and pure, right? And He is not hurt or diminished by even all the evils ever done by any one and everyone everywhere, for all time. So, the consequences, the rewards, the wages, if you will, all happen because He chooses to make them so.
“And since God is good and loving, He does all this for our benefit. He made us because He loves us, we live our first life on earth, so we can learn before we commit to eternity, He sent His own Son to live among us, to teach us, even to die on our behalf, and then to rise again for our hope and solace.
“So each of us lives in the life granted by God, and we grow as we will, choosing this or that for our values and works. Even the Hindu meets and acts in relation to someone who was Christian or like Christ. Even the Muslim who is taught the Bible is twisted away from Allah, learns right and wrong, and decides what pleases his heart. Even the name is varied. You know, Jesus never said a word of English, nor Latin, so much we attribute to Him, even where it is true, is not true insofar as we have changed the language, and sometimes meaning is lost in that translation.
“So it is, that people who do not believe in the Christ pronounced by a denomination, or the Annoying Screaming Preacher Network, yet have the opportunity to know Him, and to have Him in their lives, as they choose.
“Everything we do, say, and think counts, you know. And the good all counts to reward and growth. None of it is lost. A lot of people do good all the time, and never think twice about all the treasure they could be storing up.”

“That all sounds great” I said, “but if it was that wonderful, why did Jesus say that some have received their reward in full, and why is anyone in Hell?”

Robert stopped and shook his head.

“Dan, you know how 401k’s worked? You put your money in, and as you saved it built up. But if someone takes out the money they put in, it’s gone, OK? The principal is gone because you used it, and you can’t grow interest where there is nothing to build from.“It’s the same thing here, but much more important. If someone does a good deed, then brags about it, he’s getting his good right back so he can enjoy it, right? So, he good he did is consumed by his desire to please himself, and so he has already received his reward.
“As for Hell, that’s a sad thing, but we can’t make people choose well or against their heart.”

“That sounds awfully pat for eternal damnation” I retorted.

“Aha.” Said Robert “The light dawns.“You think everybody sent to Hell is there forever, huh?”

I answered him with Scripture:“Matthew 25:46 – ‘Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life”

Robert smiled“Are you worried, Dan?

“OK, how about this: Isaiah 25:8 “He will swallow up death forever. The Sovereign LORD will wipe away the tears from all faces”

“Sound like God’s confused, or maybe we can talk about it?”

I shrugged, and we plodded on.

I looked over at Robert in some annoyance.

“What, now you’re a psychologist? I’m sure you don’t mean God got confused!” I said.

Robert grinned.

“OK, Dan” answered Robert, ”You know the Bible pretty well. Let’s review about punishment, since we’re headed that way.“You’re right about that line saying ‘eternal punishment’, but that doesn’t mean ‘torture’, necessarily. If your daughter acted up when she was little, what did you do?”

“Usually, she got a ‘time-out’ or no dessert” I answered.

Robert nodded.

“Right. And that was punishment for misbehaving, and intended to teach her a lesson, right?”

“OK” I interrupted, “but I didn’t give her ‘time-out’ for forever. What’s the lesson in “eternal” punishment? You know, that was a real problem for a lot of people I knew, the idea that a limited sin, even a mistake, could result in being punished forever.”

“Ixnay” said Robert.

“Excuse me?” I asked.

“I mean think about it, and don’t forget we have to take some things on faith, Dan” answered Robert.

”In the first place, God is good and just, and He’s not going to send anybody to eternal punishment just for an honest error. But there’s more. I can’t tell you why a thing may merit a permanent punishment, although I would guess it’s because some folks just can’t bring themselves to let go of their sin. Remember those guys you and Beth saw, chasing those women?”

Startled, I just nodded.

“Think about their problems, now. They lusted so much and so deeply, they can’t stop, even when the physical tools are gone, even when there is no satisfaction for them, no matter what they try.” said Robert.

“These poor souls are just like the rich people who can’t get over the fact that no one uses money here, or the politicians who are just now beginning to see that they have no power over any other person. If you can’t make yourself let go of the old wicked ways, you can’t begin to get ready for the greater life.”

I nodded and laughed.

“And it gets you chased by a pack of big, angry hounds, too” I said.

We paused, and I pointed out the shiny bump on Earth. “By the way, Robert” I asked, “What is that?”

Robert smiled and said ”New digs, my friend. The shiny part is New Jerusalem, about 1400 miles across if I remember, with walls and streets of gold”

“So who’s building it?” I asked.

”Angels” replied Robert.

”did you see all the blurry traffic? Gabriel is waaaaay busy, these days.”

“Huh” I replied, a snappier answer refusing to present itself.

“OK, I think I understand more about punishment, Robert” I said after some time. “We get what we deserve, huh?”“Maybe” answered Robert. ”Remember Mercy, always remember Mercy. If we don’t get Mercy, we get Justice, but God said ‘I will have mercy on whom I will have mercy.’

“And to answer your earlier question about non-Christians, it’s kind of like pulling over a car and finding a child at the wheel. You don’t ignore what he did, but you don’t forget it’s a kid, not an adult who has taken the test and knows the law.
“Christians enjoy a special relationship with God, through Jesus Christ. But the Christian can’t keep sinning, or they haven’t really accepted Christ at all.
“And as you may have noticed, we have work to do here as well. If you accept the place with Christ, you accept his will and command as well.”

“So anyone who isn’t Christian is like a little child?” I asked.Robert smiled.“We all are, if we’re going to enter the kingdom of Heaven.”

“I’m confused again” I admitted. “It sounds like there’s no difference in being a Christian or not, after all.”

“Oh, there is!” Robert assured me.

We reached a place where rocks were arranged, almost like a sofa, so we sat.“You see, Dan” said Robert, ”we were all made for a purpose, and God knew early on how we would respond to His will. So He knew the choices we would make, and he planned His work around them, so that everything would work out to accomplish good.
“That has several effects. One is, even if we succeed brilliantly in what we do, it’s only because it suited God to favor us; we have no business getting a big head, because we didn’t deserve the success. On the other hand, if we fail, it was never going to work anyway, since it lacked His approval.”

I frowned and asked “So, why even try?”

“Exactly!” cried Robert. ”What matters is we try. We cannot change God’s will, and we cannot hope to control the course of His work, but we do decide our own course, and how we try, and what we do within our own hearts, is allowed us by God. “God judges us by our choices in such conditions, whether we enjoy good times or suffer bad, whether we have advantage of position or are dispossessed.
“Ultimately, there is a range of choices and decisions we make, and the end result of them determines our reconciliation with God. He is Sovereign, yet we enjoy free will.”

“So how” I asked “does all this work into the Christian/non-Christian thing? There are some people who say you must accept Jesus Christ, or you go to hell. Others say we all go to Heaven, there is no hell. Still others… well, you get the idea. What’s the story?”

“Christ came to save the whole world” said Robert. ”He brought forgiveness for all sins, save one, by His death in our place on the cross. Heaven is real, and so is Hell. Frankly, what gets lost in all of this, is that the Gospel is “Good News”, precisely because it not only saves us from Hell if we will have it, it gives us the “abundant life” of living in love and freedom from the old hard ways of laws and penalties. Most of all, it makes any good thing possible for us, if we willl have it.
“Now, you know that after His resurrection, Jesus ascended into Heaven to stand by God the Father. The reason He didn’t start His kingdom right away, is the same reason He sent disciples out to preach the Gospel while He was still among us:
“We are meant to be involved in God’s work. And the role for Christians is, we lead the way for others to follow. If we do it right, we receive all manner of reward, not the kind men know, like money or rank, but we are given authority by God according to the fruit we bear.“Everyone gets that choice, no matter where they come from. And anyone who thinks, for example, that more Christians will come from “Christian” nations, well, they don’t see how it balances out. America, for instance, allows freer worship by Christians than, say, Iran, but you also have a lot more distractions, like churches which call themselves “Christian”, but love money, or all sorts of sinful temptations. In the end, the decision is made against similar, if not exactly the same, difficulties and obstacles.”

I thought about that.

“So, are you saying the Christians get better rewards than the non-Christians?” I asked.

Robert chuckled.“Depends on what you call ‘better’ “ he answered. ”Christians are part of the family of God, and like the older son in the parable of the Prodigal Son, some aren’t real happy to see who will be forgiven, after all their deeds are known.

“And like the Centurion, some people will be surprises to everyone but Christ.”

“By the way, Robert” I asked, having thought of a question nagging at me, “Beth told me I would see Mikki later, but not now. How come?”

Robert smiled.

“Don’t worry, Dan” he said, ”You’ll see her when it’s time, but this is not the place.“Don’t you see how barren it is here?” Robert said, waving his arm around so I would notice the dirt and rocks, the utter absence of plants or people around us.
“After all, you don’t see Bruce with me right now, do you?”

“I meant to ask you” I said, “He “made it” too, huh?”

“Yep” answered Robert, ”and his assignment now is tougher than mine.

“He’s talking things over with our old boss, Mr. Willden.”

“The guy who wanted me to fire you for wearing a pink suit?” I laughed.

“The same” laughed Robert. “I know now, though, that he was under a lot of pressure from the Head Office.”

“Still…” I said.

“Yeah, he did yell a lot” admitted Robert.

”Later, I’ll see how that went, and maybe I can fill you in later.”

We must have been getting closer. I could now make out the distinct smells of sweat, urine, beer, and sulfur as we proceeded through the renewed mist.

As we got closer, and the stench of Hell was joined by the ugly apparition of the place, as if a city had been made of a landfill, then drenched with sewage and defecation, with all semblance of artiface and beauty stripped from it, so that one could look anywhere and see the same dismal view. Every sense recoiled from the place. As we grew near to the great city of filth, I saw movement amongst the debris, and realized the place was teeming with vermin and insects.We stopped and gaped. Well, I gaped. Robert produced a sack from somewhere, and removed two sets of rubber-like overalls, and bandanna-like masks to cover our mouths and noses.“Whew! Yeah, we’ll need waders!”A funny think happened, then. Both sets of ‘waders’ and their masks, were a nondescript grey, but when Robert stepped into his and pulled them up, they became the same crisp, clean white that his suit was, although his waders also sported a silver trim along the seams. I checked my waders. Still drab and grey. I shrugged and followed Robert into the mire.As we entered the ring of mud and trash which surrounded Hell, I noticed a sudden increase in the volume of shouts, cries, a funny grinding noise, and shrieks of pain. I looked around for little guys with pitchforks, or big guys with cloven hooves, but so far it was just me and Robert. While I could smell sulfur, it didn’t seem to be connected with anything like burning. In fact, so far the place seemed cold, dank, sullen.

“This, uh, doesn’t seem like the stories make it out” I commented.

“No” answered Robert, ”but it’s as depressing and ugly as I expected.”The ground sloped downward as we walked further, and the sky seemed to darken.Up ahead, we saw our first denizen of Hell, a small (very small, actually) man covered in mud and filth. He seemed to be stuck up to his shins in the muck, and we was waving frantically at us.

“Hello! Hello! Come here!” he cried.

“How can we help you, friend?” asked Robert, as we stepped carefully through the mire.“Help me get to where I belong” replied the man. As we came closer, I could see that his clothes, before they had become so soiled, had been of fine quality and high price. His glasses, still stuck in a chest pocket of his suit jacket, were gold-rimmed and obviously custom-made. His high forehead suggested an intellectual lean, and suddenly I recognized him.

“Bishop Dake!” I cried

“Ah. It’s good to be recognized” responded the Bishop, as Robert and I reached down to pull him up form his muddy hole. Then I remembered something else about Bishop Dake: Despite a large, urban, progressive ministry, Bishop Dakes had no tolerance for gays. I remembered an old newspaper photo, which showed Dakes yelling at the partner of a murdered gay man, during the funeral, no less. I looked over at Robert, but his quick nod told me he knew who this was, but was going to help anyway. But pulling Dakes out of his hole was harder than we thought

“Sir, you seem to be stuck on something” observed Robert. ”Are there any branches or obstructions below the surface?”

Dakes shook his head. “No, I don’t know of any”

So we pulled harder, and very slowly, Dakes began to come up.As he did, I suddenly realized that one of Dakes’ arms had been down in the mud. Robert had been pulling on his shoulder, while I had his other arm. As we raised Dakes further, we saw why.Very slowly, as we raised the minister, we saw a small reptile, like a gecko, clinging to Dakes’ arm. Another, still below the mud, also held his hand. As the first one’s head cleared the mud, it peered at us with bright red eyes (OK, now it didn’t look like a gecko anymore!), and it scurried up Dakes’ arm, and quickly whispered something into his ear. Dakes looked at me, then Robert, and went pale, then red with anger

"Unhand me!” he demanded, and he shook his arm loose from me. I heard a chuckle from one of the lizards still under the mud.

“I thought you wanted out” I said.

“Not to be with men like you two” retorted Dakes. Robert rolled his eyes behind Dakes, and grinned at me, like ‘I’ve-heard-this-before’, but he didn’t let go, as Dakes wrestled from below.

“But you’re stuck in a mudhole in Hell” I replied. “Don’t you want to get out?”

“Monsters!” boomed Dakes, “I know what you are. You think you can take me where you want, so you two can do what you want, make me just like you. Well, I’m a man, not a freak!
“Let me go!”

“OK, sir” said Robert, and he let Dakes go – - plop –back into the mud. The little lizards or whatever chucked as the man sank back into his hole. There sure sounded like Dakes had a lot of them in there with him.

“You do know where you are, right?” I asked Dakes.

“You go to hell” rebutted the minister, which told me enough.Robert and I trudged on, down, and further into the dark.

We stomped along in the dismal pallor of Hell, and I watched with fascination, as the muck from the mudhole simply began to disappear from Robert. I glanced down, and saw that my muck was still there. Well, at least the mask was good for keeping out the smell.

“Is everybody we meet down here going to be that much fun?” I asked Robert.“Oh yeah, remember how some people say all the really interesting people are all down here.”Robert stopped suddenly, and laughed loudly for a few seconds.

“Private joke?” I asked.

”I’m sorry.” said Robert. ”But I just remembered how my first girlfriend told me she just knew, that on Judgment Day I’d go to Hell. I bet she didn’t mean it this way, is all.”

I laughed at that, too.

Ahead in the distance, we saw three men arguing. They appeared to be quite agitated about something. Given the difficulty we’d had with a man pinned by mud, I wondered how we would handle these fellows, if we couldn’t reason with them.As we came closer, I realized that the three men were each being assailed by tiny insects. But somehow, the men couldn’t see the insects, and were blaming each other for the bites and cuts they suffered, adding blows and insults to the damage. I also realized, as we came closer, that the men were so beaten and injured by their blows, that they could not hurt us much, though they could suffer. In any case, like Dakes, they also were smaller than I expected, as if they had shrunk when they arrived in Hell. Robert stepped forward, swatting away insects and calling for the men to

”Stop! You don’t need to do this.”The first man, bleeding from a hundred cuts and bites, turned to Robert and yelled

“As if you knew anything!“This one” – he pointed at the man to his left, who obligingly tried to bite his finger and snarled at us when he missed – “has tormented me for years, and now I finally have forced him to stand and take it, he brings his friend here-”

“Friend!” interrupted the second man, who appeared to have broken or bruised most, if not all, of his bones, “I don’t even know this guy. You two set on me like a pair of muggers-“

“Muggers!” yelled the third, whose body seemed to have been burned by a thousand tiny hot needles in every place, “First old wheezer here stalks me like his whole world revolves on doin’ me in. Now you think that just because you show up, you’re the show?!?”

“Gentlemen” began Robert, ”I think my friend and I can help you resolve all this, and-“

The three men interrupted Robert with cackling laughs. “Oh yeah, biiiiiiig guys gonna help us out, huh?”
“What if we tell you to go beat it, huh? Think we can’t take you two?”
“Hey, nobody asked you, alright”

“I don’t think you understand, guys.” I said. “You don’t see everything that’s going-“

The men started in on their cackling laugh and taunts again, as Robert and I realized that they were enjoying their feuds, and didn’t want our help.“Is this whole place going to be like this?” I asked Robert, as we moved on. Robert shrugged.“I hope not, but I don’t know.”

As we walked along, the light got dimmer, the ground more slippery, and the smell even stronger. Robert seemed to be having about as much fun as I was, although his immaculate appearance kept him easy to follow.

“Tell me again why we’re here?” I asked Robert.

“Well, you wanted to know how a person could end up in Hell.” replied Robert, “Getting any good lessons?”“I guess” I said. “Hey, I just realized everyone I’ve met so far has been American, whether saint, or, uh, these guys. Why is that?”

Robert shrugged.“I’m not controlling it, so I don’t know. But I guess it’s a communication thing; you see what you can recognize, you meet people you can talk with.
“We’re here to help you, you know.”

I stopped, looked at Robert for a few seconds, then started again towards a group of boys I saw sitting in the mud.

As we approached the boys, a few foul-smelling drops of warm liquid fell on my shoulders, and I pulled my hood up just before a shower of vile something began to fall, making the ground even slicker, and the smell worse than before. For some reason, the five boys just sat in the mire, getting wet with what I now realized was a rain of something like vomit and urine mixed together. I was careful not to look up; I wasn’t sure what was delivering the ‘rain’.The boys, as we reached them, turned out to be much older, full-grown men, but they were so small in size and build, that I had taken them for boys. They sat in a small pond of slimy muck, surrounded by things which swam just below the surface. I remembered the red-eyed reptiles and shuddered.

“Hello, do you need help?” I asked the men. But they just sat there, although one slowly turned his head towards me. As he did I saw an insect of some kind, like a scorpion with teeth, which was chewing on his face just below his eye. I tried not to stare.Robert looked pale.

“Does that hurt?” he asked the man.

“Yeah” responded the man.

“Would you like me to remove the thing?” asked Robert.

”Naah. S’Okay.” Replied the man. “It just comes back anyway.”

I was amazed at the apathy of these men.“Do you need help?” I asked one of them.“No” he said, without moving a muscle.

“I’m good.”

“Don’t you want to get up?” I asked. “You could leave her for a better place”

“Naah” two others replied. “Why bother?”

Robert and I looked at the men, then each other, and we left them to their inanimate rest.We walked for a while with nothing to say. Then Robert stopped, and said“I think I know what that was all about. But let’s wait until we see the next group.”

Puzzled, smeared with mire and stench, we pressed on.

Chapter Four: Walking

2004-11-28T13:27:00.000-08:00

I became a little confused as we made our way ahead and down. I had gotten used to the growing darkness and stench, but as we headed towards the next group, there seemed to be a brassy glow ahead, and the smell changed, though not for the better. Now, we became unpleasantly aware of more human odors, sweat and excrement. I wondered if Robert was as sensitive to the smell as I was, but when I saw him uncomfortably adjust his mask, I realized, with some comfort, that he was also aware of the change in olfactory presence.I was getting used to “little” people in hell, so I was not surprised to see that the children I expected, were in fact small adults. But I was surprised by what they were doing.The group of seven were haggling over piles of feces and pools of urine, bargaining loudly over how much their pile was “worth”. I stopped and my jaw dropped.One among the group turned, saw us, and chuckled.

“Yeah, pretty impressive, isn’t it?” he asked. “Took me awhile to put it together, but there it is.”I just turned and looked at Robert, who shrugged.

“Uhhhh, mister” I began, “you do know you’re building a pile of crap, don’t you?”

“Yes indeed, you catch on quick” remarked the man. “Or do you?”

“You see” said the man, “We here were all very prominent financial experts, so we got together to see what we could make of the place.
“We’ve laid claim to a hundred acres around here, and of course, we needed a currency reserve, so we thought to ourselves, ‘what can we produce, that will do the job?’, and here we are.”

Robert grimaced.“Nobody wants to buy feces!” he cried.

The man grinned.

“Not now, sure” he said, “but later, when folks realize that’s all there is here, and when they realize that we’ve laid claim to the property, they’ll do business with us.
“Besides, we found a use –“ the man winked - “for the stuff, as well”

“But if you already have a pile of crap, what will you be selling, and what will you be buying?” I asked.

“Services, for now” said the man. “Then we’ll see.

“Hey, there’s still time to get in, on the ground floor, if you have the vision to see a great chance” offered the man.Somehow, the opportunity to build a financial empire from feces and urine didn’t excite me, so Robert and I just shook our heads and moved on.

The light went away again as we left the west bankers behind, but so did the smell, so it was a trade-off. But the further we went, the harder it was to see where we were headed ahead, and I was very glad to have Robert nearby.

Naturallly, that’s when he surprised me with bad news:

“Dan, I have to leave now” he said, “Another is coming to lead you where you are going.” I was able to discern a murky movement – away .

“Wait! Robert! Don’t leave me here!”“Don’t worry, it will be all right” called back Robert, and then somehow, I knew he was gone.I was getting real tired of hearing how everything was going to be all right. I also realized that if I didn’t get some help, I had no idea how to get out of hell. For just a moment, panic seized me and danced over me, as I wondered if God might have decided to just let me sit where I was. After all, hadn’t I chosen to go to hell? The irony of my own words coming back to condemn me was chilling.

Sitting in the dark alone, with cold wet winds of urine raining down on you, is depressing enough by itself, but to be abandoned by your friend, with no way home, and the uncomfortable feeling that you belonged in your misery, was almost beyond bearing.But after a long time of sitting in the fetid mud of waste and my self-pity, I decided I had to move on. The dark had grown, and I was not entirely certain which way I was going, although I wasn’t sure it mattered, either. I stumbled ahead, reasonably sure I was continuing as I had before, and aware that the ground continued to descend, a fact which I like not at all just now.After a while, my eyes began to adjust to the dark, enough to make out murky shapes in the dank and dreary domain. I thought I could make out some movement, and maybe just a bit more light off to my left, so I made my way in that direction. Partly from habit, I muttered a short prayer, asking God to watch over me and protect me from harm. I could have sworn I heard a quiet chuckle off in the distance when I concluded with “In Jesus’ name, Amen”. I stopped, and listened for a few seconds, but there was nothing more.As I walked, I heard what sounded very much like a party! This was different enough, that I decided I should check it out. At that moment I felt a breeze in my ear, like someone had blown in it, but there was no one there. I shivered for a moment, then moved ahead.I was sure that I had heard people’s voices, and as I approached I saw forms like humans and their shadows, but as I entered a cave and left the rain of stench and feces behind, I could not find the guests.As I moved about the cave, I felt hands caress me in private places, and quick snatches of words I could almost, but not quite, understand. A vague unease crept over me, and I decided there was something very wrong about this place, and my best course would be to leave. At that moment, as I stepped towards the mouth of the cave, I felt my feet yanked out from beneath me, and I hit the floor of the cave, face-first, and was stunned by the blow.The foul smell of some kind of animal filled my nose, and those unseen hands began to pull away at my clothes, as those voices spoke again, and tried to soothe me into compliance. In a panic and sure things were getting seriously bad, I resisted the hands, but was slowly losing the fight.From the back of the cave, I became aware of a man. He was naked, and realizing his intent I was glad from my memory of the plains before Heaven’s Gate, that his equipment was no longer there. But this fellow had put something in its place, somehow grafting something where his genitals used to be, and his intent filled me with horror. As he grew closer, the hands tightened their grip upon me, and I realized I could not escape. I also realized that the dark thing at his crotch was alive, and as he approached, it chuckled and showed me sharp teeth.I recoiled in horror, or tried to, as the man and that thing laughed...

A Word was spoken.

I don’t know how else to describe it. A simple word was heard in that place, which I cannot repeat now, and with it a bright flash of light filled the room. There was no force like heat or an explosion, yet everyone fell to the floor.I was not stunned like the others, although the light was hard to bear. Looking away from its source, I saw that the forms which had held me could now be seen, shadowlike but visible now, and they trembled in terror. I felt pity for them for just an instant, then I remembered what they had been trying to do, and I stepped away from them quickly.

The bright one spoke to me, and I knew her voice:“Dan, are you OK?”

It was my sister, Jean, although taller and stronger than I had ever seen her, and she shone like a potassium flare, though with a beauty and power no mortal creation could match. As the light faded or my eyes adjusted, I could now see that she was dressed mainly in white, in something like a bio-suit (appropriate to our location), but with green trim and in her fashion from years before, decorated to look like a Hereford cow. I chuckled in spite of myself.

“You don’t know how happy I am to see you, sister” I said, and we hugged.

Jean grinned at me. “This your idea of a party?” she asked, ”These your buddies?”

“Not hardly” I answered, “Let’s go”

And we moved on, although I was depressed to see we were still descending

Is this trip really necessary?” I muttered to myself, as we walked, but Jean overheard me.

“Yes, of course” she answered, ”and I’m gonna be nice, and not ask what you were up to with your buddies, there.”

“Oh, come on!” I shouted “I’m glad you broke in there and stopped it, but that’s not even funny!”

Jean grinned. "I thought it was pretty funny” she said. ”Besides, didn’t you read the sign?” , pointing to a small wooden sign I didn’t recall seeing before.

I hunched down and peered at it. I recognized the letter style, but not the words.“It’s Greek to me” I said.

Jean laughed.“Not knowing your classic languages has always gotten you into trouble, Dan.”

I muttered my response, but made sure it was sotto voce, to prevent further rejoinder.

As we made our way, the ground seemed to become a little more level, and it was dry in places, but as the smell changed again, becoming worse if not stronger, I saw Jean stop for a moment, look around, then point to a pass between two ranges of mud range.“This way”I followed. She seemed to know what she was doing, and since she was still glowing somewhat, it was easy to follow her, and I was afraid of the dark now, for good reason. Looking back, I could also tell that things were following us, to what purpose and consequence I did not know.

The right mud range moved, and I expected a mudslide, so I wasn’t surprised when Jean yelled “Run!”In the twilight murk of this netherworld, something rose up where I had thought a hillside lay, and I realized it was a man. A grotesquely fat man, not unusually tall, but so wide in girth, that his belly had spilled out onto the ground, covering nearly a quarter-acre of ground. In its middle, the man waded through his own skin and fat, dragging the greater portion of his own body behind him.As I regarded this grotesque spectacle, I suddenly realized he was not alone, and we were being approached on all sides by similar creatures.I ran again, hoping that we would make it.As we ran, I wondered at this strange chase. None of the creatures was moving with any speed, and I was sure if it were a few, we would easily lose them.But there were so many of them, and their size made it easy for them to block escape by simply getting into our way, that I began to worry.

We caught a break, however, when the things which had been chasing us came into view.Scurrying little reptiles and insects, I found them repulsive, but the sluglike dwellers of this place quickly fell on them and began to scoop them whole into their massive mouths, which seemed far too large for any human face.But we were able to escape from them by this diversion, and found ourselves quickly in the dismal but familiar piss rain and feces shower.

Jean grinned at me.“Having fun yet, Dan?”

I had the bizarre feeling she was enjoying all of this.

In spite of Jean’s glowing appearance, the world around us remained dark and dreary, and the contracts was making it hard for me to see what was out there. I wasn’t curious, but I also worried that not knowing would invite unpleasant surprises. Jean, however, continued to enjoy the jaunt, fairly jogging through the slop as we progressed.

“C’mon, Dan” she called out from ahead of me, ”only one more stop we have to make on this level.”

‘On this level?’ I thought to myself. I really didn’t like making this venture any longer than it had to be, and I really didn’t like the idea of other levels. Somehow, I knew the other ones would be in the wrong direction. Jean caught my mood, and grinned again.

“Don’t worry, Dan” she said, ”I’ll make sure you’re okay.”

Since my sister was now eight feet tall, and looked like she could take out Arnold on his best day, I didn’t argue. I did envy her spotless suit, while mine – let’s just say I wanted to find a hose. Soon.

“Just so I don’t have to repeat this lesson later” I said, “how about clueing me on what I’m supposed to be learning?”

“OK” said Jean, ”Just remember, it’s supposed to be you learning, not you cribbing off my observations, alright?”

I nodded, and she explained.“So far here in HappyLand, we have seen people in a variety of situations, all Americans so far, since that’s our cultural reference. Have you noticed what they have in common?”“Their fashion sense, their common appreciation of freedom from any need for hygiene?” I suggested.

“No points, especially for that kind of humor” Jean answered, ”Seriously, what did you notice?”

I stopped and pondered.“Well, they aren’t exactly happy” I said, “but the people here aren’t really being tormented, like I’d expect.”

“Partly, that’s because they just started” said Jean, ”And it will get much worse later, especially when this rain stops, and the fire starts.”

The way she said “fire” made me shiver, and it had nothing to being cold. I had not thought that this rain of urine and crap could be considered a good thing, but I realized that it might be holding off something very ugly.

“OK, what else?” prodded Jean.“Well, everybody here seems to be short” I commented.

Jean nodded.”Yes, they are diminished by their sin. Some further on are so weighed down, you have to watch your step, so you don’t step on any of them”

“So, by your logic” I quipped, “Lilliput was a very evil place!”

“Ha ha.” deadpanned Jean. "Just remember, Dan, a judgmental attitude stunts your growth”

And with that, we both fell silent for a time, as we trudged into the murk and mire.

It’s a very strange thing, to walk in a place where all around you people are suffering, but you are not, and to not be able to identify with them the way you normally would in the human world. I wondered about why I wasn’t more moved, as we passed people rooted in their own indifference, apathy, hate, lust, envy, gluttony, and every other wrong but human deficiency, and I stopped, wondering how I could not feel the compassion I believed I should in such a case.Spying one fellow off by himself, and seeming particularly more miserable than the rest, I decided I was going to try. Behind me, I heard Jean call out to me:“Dan! Where are you going? It’s this way!”

“I’m going to help, if I can” I replied, “Come with me or not, as you want.”

Like everyone else here, the man appeared smaller than normal, and I could see him shiver in the cold rain. I approached the man, and put my arm around his shoulders to shield him somewhat from the rain. Surprised, the man rounded on me and shoved me away.

“What are you doing?” he demanded.

“Sorry, just trying to help” I answered. “You looked cold and tired, that’s all”

The man sneered at me.“Ohhhh, I’m not strong like you, I’m not able to take care of myself, is that it?” he demanded. Before I could answer, he continued;“I can do very well, thank you. It’s people like you that have always been such a pain!
“You think you have all the answers, you have all the ideas, and folks like me should just do what you say, eh?”

“Actually, no, nothing like that” I said. Then an idea hit me. ”But I think I know how we can leave this place.” In that moment, I realized that I could leave, and so could this guy, if he would come with me. But I could see in his face, that instead of hope, he had found rage.

“Nothing like that?” he asked. “Then you tell me to come with you, if I want to get out. Yeah, right!”

“Really, I can help” I said, but the man had turned his back on me, and as he did, I saw him sink a foot or so into the mire. I suddenly realized, that things for this guy were going to get worse if he didn’t move.

“You really need to leave here” I said, but the man became very angry.

“Maybe I like it here, OK?” he demanded. “Maybe you can just go off and -“and the man named several unpleasant acts most people would find offensive.

Jean came up on us then.

“Who’s the glowstick?” asked the man.

“My sister” I replied. “If you won’t listen to me, maybe she-“The man cut me off with an expletive, involving placement of a lightbulb into an orifice, and I finally gave up.As Jean and I walked away, the man continued with a torrent of words and insults. Jean looked at me, and seemed to read my thoughts, as she answered.

“Dan, no one is here unjustly, even the ones who think so. Does that help?”

“But why don’t I feel compassion for them?” I asked. “There’s something wrong in that”

Jean shook her head.”No, Dan, there’s nothing wrong with you in that.” she said. ”If you could have done any good, you would have known before you tried. But these have rejected hope, some just for now, some forever. Unless they turn, you cannot make them.”

We walked on, and the dark grew deeper.

As we walked, I wondered what lay ahead. It seemed a useless effort indeed, to come to a place where you could do no good, to see people suffering. Some by their own choice, some in denial of their own pain, others in denial of their chance for relief and healing. I shook my head.Jean turned to me, and we stopped.

“Dan, in a little bit, I’m going to have to go, but not before your next guide arrives.” she said. ”I want you to understand, you’re going to come back here, but not before you are better-equipped. For now, I want you to remember what you saw here, and think about what purpose may be served, even yet.”

As she turned and I followed her, my thought just then, was that Jean had never been so firm and authoritive before, when we had been siblings in the old world. I also wondered just how dark and messy this place was going to be. Certainly, this place had no landmarks or architecture to see where you were. I wondered, idly, if GPS would do any good here.In the distance, I saw a glow, but remembering the last glow I had followed, I waited until Jean started that way, and I wondered what lay ahead. To my surprise and pleasure, the ground gradually became firmer, drier, and little by little, the smell receded, until I realized that I stank more than my surroundings.

Given everything I had encountered up to that point, this made me suspicious as all get-out.We were approaching a shining figure in the distance, a really big guy. I realized this was another being sent from Heaven, but bigger and brighter than anyone I had seen so far. Maybe ten feet tall! I began to wonder if Heaven was into Basketball, and where the nets might be placed.As we approached, the light became so bright, it hurt my eyes, and I couldn’t look at the shining being directly. I averted my eyes, and noticed that his feet seemed to be floating motionless about a couple inches from the ground.

Jean ran up to the being and hugged him. As they did, I saw his wings for the first time.“He’s an angel!” I exclaimed.

Jean laughed.“Yes! I’m glad you two can meet. Daniel, say hello to-" A Word was spoken, and I fell face-first into the muck from the force of it.

The Angel picked me up, and I trembled.“Do not be afraid” he instructed. ”For here, you may call me Asena. It won’t set off any after-effects like my true name.“I will be your guide for the next stage. I hope you will enjoy this next part, but please tell me if you become weak, and I shall minister to you.”

I suddenly realized the angel had strengthened me when he picked me up.Asena turned to Jean.“Cherished friend, the Master also sent me to tell you the City needs your skill and attention”Jean nodded, smiled at me.“Bye Dan, be good.”

She blinked and disappeared, and I had visions, just for a moment, of an old television show.

Asena looked down at me, covered in filth and grime as I was, and smiled.

“Daniel, are you ready to meet the Master?” he asked.

Chapter Five: Discussions

2004-11-28T01:01:00.000-08:00

Asena waited politely, while I tried to think of a good answer. On the one hand, as a Christian, I knew I should be thrilled to go home to the Father. On the other, having so recently seen hell, I could not help but wonder, how much of what I had done deserved such punishment or worse.

“Uh, I don’t know that I’m fit to…” I stalled, and stopped in mid-sentence, as I saw Asena smile broadly, like there was a big joke I was missing.

“Daniel, you are ready, if you choose to be” said the angel.

I didn’t say anything, but I thought that sounded rather ‘zen’ for an angel of God. I nodded anyway, and followed Asena ahead, and we were back in the dark mists again. I looked down, and far below I saw the ground opened into wide cracks, more than a foot across now. I also saw why we were several feet above the ground; we were flying quickly across the terrain with each step, and in the distance I could see heads turn to watch us as we sped by, faster and faster, until we became a blur. In a few moments, we were standing in a foyer of what appeared to be blue jade.I turned and looked behind me, and in the distance, I saw the twinkle of the reflection of what might have been a tall, golden fence. I looked at Asena, and he chuckled.

“No rebound this time, Daniel” he said. ”It must be time.

“ See you later, maybe”And he was gone.

I remembered visits to various people in my life. Sometimes I had looked forward eagerly to the experience, other times I was caught up in the work of the moment, and didn’t realize how significant the person was. And sometimes, I was plain intimidated by the personage I was to see. But this was in a class all by itself. I thought about how God had appeared in the Bible; the wrathful Deity who had wiped Sodom and Gomorrah off the face of the planet, the Burning Bush to Moses, the God of Glory Who filled All of Heaven when Ezekiel saw Him, the raging wind and still small voice to Elijah, the Messiah, true but unaccepted, to Israel in the person of Christ Jesus.Thinking about the pattern of good people and the angel I had seen, I figured Jesus would be a 40-foot shining figure, sort of like Daniel described him, or John in Revelation. I wondered what His horse’s name was.Curiosity finally got the better of me, and ever so slowly I stuck my nose, then my face, past the wall into the main hall ahead. Glancing up, I realized that unless God has painted the ceiling to look like sky, there was no ceiling, and God-as-NBA-champ gained support in my mind. In the distance, about a quarter mile ahead, a massive throne, sort of like Lincoln’s memorial to a ridiculous scale, towered above a ring of what seemed to be smaller thrones, but still much bigger than any human I had ever met. But no people were here.

Surrounding the thrones was a plaza of white stone, and around it a blue sea, but calm and quiet, like glass. Rainbows cascaded around the entire great hall, reflected from where I could not tell, and there was a faint music in the air, too quiet to make out exactly, but distinct enough to recognize as music and not mere random sound.

“Like it?” I heard behind me, and I whirled, expecting to see some holy Superman. Instead, I looked into the face of a man about my age, about my height, dressed simply in a beige shirt and slacks, of a style and age I couldn’t decide. No belt, no buttons, the fabric plain but comfortable.As I looked at this man, I suddenly realized I had met him before. I started, as I realized that I had seen this man many times, in many places. I had nodded to him as he held the door open for me, he was the fireman who had pulled me from my wrecked car once, he was the friend who had kept me out of a fight once, but I also realized he was the homeless man I had decided to walk past, he was the employee I had to counsel for drug abuse, he was the friend whose affair I knew about but had not prevented, he was the stranger who had been robbed, who I helped once.I was at once awed, dismayed, encouraged, confused, worried, pleased, and contrite.

“My Lord and my God” I said, fully understanding Thomas for the first real time.

“Hello Daniel” said Jesus, and He was gentle. ”Let’s go sit down and talk”

Jesus led me to a small room to the side, with two armchairs and a low table with three books on it. We sat, and with one hand, He picked up the first book, which lay on top of the other two, a big, heavy, legal-looking thing. As He opened it, I leaned forward, expecting to hear Him speak-And instead found myself experiencing the events of my life, all the bad ones. Everything I had ever done, said, or thought, and all the pain, loss, and suffering it had caused. I saw a lie I had told my parents when I was very young, and I heard angels cry in dismay, as my integrity took its first hit. I recalled an old bully, who had hurt me many times in school, and wondered to see, later, how I had hurt him worse, by refusing to speak to him years later, when he had changed, and wished to make amends. I saw times I stole, even when I excused my actions as ‘no big deal’ or ‘someone will take it if I don’t’. I saw lust in my heart a thousand times over, with women I could have been a good friend to, but instead I never saw past the surface. I saw blasphemies against God Himself, in all the times I had prayed for selfish things, or hurt someone’s faith in order to look feel important, and all the times God called on me to help and I turned my back instead. So many wrongs, so many evils, and these were all things I had never seen as the evil they were! I suddenly realized, that these did not include any sin which I had repented of; everything for which I had asked forgiveness for with a contrite heart, was gone from this list, and yet there were many evils, so many I was weeping openly and did not care who saw, to see how much hurt and wrong I had been and done. It seemed to go on for years, as how mean and selfish and small and cruel I had been was broadcast for any and all to hear. I was appalled that I could have been like this, and worse, stunned and dismayed that I had been so hard in my heart, that I could do such things, and not only not repent, but not recognize them. Finally there was silence, and at last I raised my eyes to see Jesus looking back at me. I expected to see His fury there, for being such a hypocrite, for ignoring so much of His word, for calling myself His follower while doing such evil. I expected to meet His wrath, and knew I deserved whatever punishment was to come. But in His eyes I saw compassion, and a great grief, and much pain. And I knew, in that instant, that as my sins and wrongs were recounted, He bore all of them, every one. I could see the marks of the Crown of Thorns on His head, and blood dripped from his hands, and I knew that my deeds had placed those pains there. I lowered my eyes in humiliation and remorse.As I did, I saw the last pages of the first book fade and disappear from His hands, as if they had never been. And I realized that as each event had been recounted, it had disappeared from the book.At last Jesus spoke, lifting my chin with His hand, to look me square in the eye.

”These are forgiven, and are no more.

“Do not return to your sin.”

I trembled and wept again at such mercy, knowing that I deserved none of it.

My attention was drawn back to the two remaining books. I wondered what they contained, and a dread crept over me, as I wondered if one of them contain sins for which I would not be forgiven. Since I had not been consciously aware of all these sins Jesus had forgiven, I began to worry about what else might be lurking in my history.Jesus opened the second book, which also looked formal and significant, but somehow it was not as foreboding as the first. He flipped through several pages, looking for something, and I realized this one was not just about me. I became very curious about reading that book, but knew that wasn’t possible for me, at least not right now. As my mind was wont to do in such times, as Jesus thumbed through pages, I wondered idly who published the books of Heaven, but Jesus reached what He was looking for, and He faced me directly, and His voice became stern:

”This is the Book of Life. No man may enter Heaven, whose name is not written here.”

I blanched. I believed in Jesus as my Savior, but I also knew, especially after the reminder of the first book, that I did not deserve to have my name in that book. Faith and Reason wrestled with each other as Jesus put his hand on my shoulder and looked again straight into my very soul, and said:

“You did not write your name in this book.

“However, I wrote your name here, by My Right.”

I was in awe, and for several moments, He said nothing and I tried to comprehend what had been said. Then Jesus made a motion, and the second book vanished.

“There is one book left” He said, and I knew my trail was not over.

Jesus picked up the third book and opened it.This one was thinner than the other two, and seemed less severe, somehow. As Jesus began to read aloud, I heard accounts of my life, from the perspective of other people. These were not all compliments, some indeed were harsh denouncements and insults, but I noticed Jesus was smiling, the first time He had smiled since we sat down.As I listened, I realized why Jesus was happy to read these words. Whether the words came from someone who was happy with me, or angry with me, they all involved those few times where I had said or done something to help a person, or otherwise pursued what was good and right. There weren’t nearly as many of these as there had been sins from the first book, but they were there, and many surprised me, things I had done because I knew it was right, or because I wanted to help, or because I care about the person I was helping. I noticed, as He went on, that every time I had helped someone in order to look good, they were not mentioned here. Just as well; I would not want even those few good things I had done in the right spirit, to be sullied by the times I was selfish and proud.As Jesus spoke, I felt changes within me, as well, and I realized that just as I had been changed by everything I had done in life, now these things further changed me, and for the better. I realized a purpose to them all, not only to glorify God, as they should, and to help my fellow person, as I hoped, but also to complete me, to make me more than I had been before. As Jesus finished reading, I finally felt, as never before, like the new creature He had promised.Jesus reached somewhere and produced a white stone, which He handed to me. On it was written a name, which I knew was my own, to be known by no one but me, my perfect name as granted by God.

”I always like this part” said Jesus. ”But remember, while you are free from temptation for a thousand years, there will be yet one final choice, one final decision. Do not forget your brothers who yet need to be reached.”

I thought about what had been said before, and nodded.

“Shall I leave now?” I asked, “Or may I ask you a few questions?”

Jesus grinned, as we stood, and pointed towards the Great Hall.

“You can ask, but how I may answer is my province.” He said.

“Okay” I began, “I see you here with me now, much like any man, except for what lies within the body. Is that the real you?”

Jesus shrugged, as we walked along.

“To some degree, only as you may perceive Me.“Perhaps you were expecting this?”

A brilliant flash blinded me for a moment, and when I could see again, I looked at where Jesus had been, and saw – a set of very large toes in the biggest sandal ever made, leading up to a brilliant shining figure fit to put the Rio’s Jesus to shame just for size.

“ – but I didn’t want to over-awe you, Daniel” said Jesus, using my old name.

“Thanks” I replied. “By the way, about the new name, since you still call me ‘Daniel’, when and how would I use the new one?”

Jesus smiled.“Daniel, remember in hell, how certain words had very, special effects? Be careful to use your name only when you are alone with Me. For the rest of the time, you’ll figure it out, but be careful to remember how you use our language.”- And I realized that now, I could understand and speak the language of Heaven. I also understood the explosive power it would have on anyone not ready for it, shining and pure as even the smallest word was.

“Are only Christians here in Heaven? What about atheists, and pagans, and jews who don’t believe in You, and animals, and, and, you know…”

Jesus laughed with amusement

“Everything in Heaven and earth has been given to My authority, Daniel.

“Be assured that I will not forget My own, however they are dispersed and however the enemy has tried to deceive them.

“Come and see!”

And He led me from the Great Hall, across the glassy sea and into a field of unimaginable beauty.I saw every sort of animal which I had known from earth, and quite a few species I could not be sure of, and so many people, I could not begin to guess the size of the place.I could tell from the people, that the people came, as the Bible promised, from every nation under Heaven. And now, they were here, some enjoying a place they obviously had expected, while still others wandered around, as if this place had been nothing more than a myth to them, yet they were here.When people saw that Jesus was here, they pretty much mobbed Him in joy, although here He had no difficulty keeping from getting crushed. We all spent about a half-hour in the all-time biggest group hug, until Jesus shooed most away to go play some more, while I and a few others were allowed to walk with Jesus. I knew, somehow, that I didn’t really deserve to be with this group, but Jesus had promised to let me ask questions, and He wasn’t going to cut me off just now.

Jesus gestured for me to continue.

“One thing I don’t understand is, how can we have Free Will, but You remain Sovereign?”

“Well Daniel” answered Jesus, ”Have you read a book, which you had read before?”

“Well, yes” I answered.“You know what is going to happen, but are you forcing the characters to act in any way differently? No, you simply know what is going to happen.

“So, in my case, I have that same knowledge, only I know all of Reality because I have known it beforehand. It’s part of omniscience. I can do anything, but I can plan my actions, my words and my works, in such a way, that I can work everything according to my Will, yet allow each person their choice and decision. I am present in everything, but I am seen very seldom, only when I choose to reveal my hand.”

I thought for a moment.

“Then, why do we suffer? Do you want us to be in pain?”

Jesus shook His head sadly.

“That is a difficult matter. If I did not allow you pain, then I could not truly be allowing you choice. Instead, I used the pain you made for yourselves, providing ways for you to learn from it, to grow, to share your experience with others in pain, that they might be able to learn and grow and not be victim again.

“It is why I came to you, as one of you, to bear what you bear, to share what you suffer, to be fully man as well as fully God.

“It is why I made Heaven, also, that the life of pain and worry and weariness and suffering might end, to be replaced with the greater life of hope and wonder.”

I hesitated, but continued:“Then why is there hell?”

Jesus looked at me directly.

“Many reasons” He said. “In the first place, people choose their course, and while I love you all, if I compelled everyone to enter Heaven, then I would have to either force you all to be pure and good, or else so control you in other ways, that you would be but slaves, and have no voice or heart of your own.

“That I will not do, for I am Sovereign, not Tyrant.”

“But why would anyone go to hell, knowing the truth as we see it here?” I asked.

“Daniel” replied the Christ,

”There are those who saw Me in my face, when I walked on the earth before, and they knew that I was the Messiah, yet they hated Me.

“There were, and are, those who hate and reject anything which does not put them first. They cannot accept any God, under any circumstances.“There are those who will not let go of their evils, some even who heard and believed the Gospel, but believed in their sin even more. Remember the Rich Young Ruler?”

I nodded.

“How can we enjoy Heaven, knowing that our brothers and sisters suffer in hell?” I asked next.

Jesus frowned.

“Well, in the first place, no one goes to hell unjustly. All who are mine, are joyful that justice is done unless mercy be had in its place.

“Further, not everyone is there forever. Remember Detention? Some will be punished far less than others, each according to what they deserve, what they choose, and whether they ultimately choose God or their sin.

“Finally, Heaven is all to the good. It is difficult to explain in human words, how it is that God, who loves all His creation, can see humans go to hell, yet be glad, but Heaven is pure and good, and there is no pain or trouble which may enter here.

“I know how that sounds, and how some may be confused, but Heaven is not about joy in the ignorance of suffering, but the reconciliation of men with God, to the resolution of all conflict.”

“Beth told me” I said “that You are the only way to Salvation.

“But the muslims, the hindus, all these other faiths, people believe them fully and follow them as they can. Are they condemned for that?”

Jesus pursed His lips, and peered at me for a moment.“You’ve been My follower all these years, and you don’t know?” He asked.

Then He smiled again, and I relaxed.

“I know, that old rhetoric thing.” said Jesus, and I nodded.“OK. You never learned Aramaic, or Greek, or Hebrew, Daniel. So, by some reasoning, you could never have called upon Me for salvation, since you only spoke modern languages.

“But, here you are with Me in Heaven. And you know why…

“I will not be fooled by a man who says ‘Lord, Lord’ with his lips, but will not have Me in his heart. Nor will I be denied when someone loves Me well.

“Think upon this:“The greatest commandment, you know, is to love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind and might. But how does someone do that?

“The man who does the will of God is the one who loves Him. And there is no justice apart from Me, no peace which I did not make, no freedom which I did not author, no honor which I did not bestow. Therefore, no man may be honorable who does not know Me, no man may insure freedom who does not recognize Me, no man may make peace who does not love Me, no man may pursue justice, who does not call upon Me.

“By their work and loves, I know My children. And the deceiver has not gained a single soul at My cost.

“Not one is lost, whose heart is like Mine, not one is forgotten who chooses what is good.”With that, we walked across the field and approached a great cliff.

The view from the cliff was impressive. A great expanse of countryside lay before us, and the light shone upon vale and hill, as though the sun was rising behind us and shining onto the land ahead and below.Jesus laughed, cocked His head at me and said:

“You know, we had some good conversations, Daniel, sometimes when you didn’t know it was Me.”I had thought Hew meant by prayer, but His last comment brought me up short.

“Huh? I don’t understand” I said.Jesus smiled and looked into the distance.

“Online chat can be an amazing thing.

“One problem, though, is I was never able to use my own name on-line.”

“Not subtle enough?” I ventured.

“Never available” Jesus answered. ”All sorts of people wanted to be ‘Jesus_Christ’ on-line, so I had to settle for some other choices.”

“Such as” I prompted.

Jesus shook His head.

“Nope. I might still want to go online, and folks are a lot more open, when they forget the Boss might be looking in on them.

“I hear what they are really saying anyway, but this way, folks are more comfortable being honest.”Jesus looked around, then motioned to the other men. They approached the cliff, and as Jesus put His arm around my shoulder, He asked, “Ever read anything by Douglas Adams? He had a pretty good idea, and we’ve sort of put it into a new version of sky-diving.”

And with that, Jesus pushed me off the cliff.

Perhaps it was faith in my Lord, that I did not cry out in fear as I fell, or perhaps I had simply encountered enough strange things, that this new event was not all that unusual. For the moment, I let my body fall and I enjoyed the warm breeze. After a moment, I heard Jesus call to me from my side, as He too plunged:

“It’s simple, really. See where the ground is? Just don’t go there!”

I stretched out my arms, and aimed ahead, and in a moment I was aware of forward motion. I can’t tell you if it was my own motive force, or the response of something else, but in any case, I was now flying, without fear or worry. Jesus drew alongside, did a neat barrel roll, and winked at me.

“So, next question?” He asked, as we sped over a flock of sheep and past slower birds.

“I guess the big one really is, why were there so many religions and faiths on earth? And wasn’t it confusing for so many competing ways of life?”

Jesus rolled onto His side, and propped His head on His hand, and looked at me closely.

“OK, Daniel” He said, ”I see you are trying to answer other people’s doubts.

“How would you like a world with only one or two flavors of food, or only black and white, no colors, and a life of extremes, burning hot or freezing cold, silence or a deafening roar?

“Abba made a world for billions of individual people, all designed and made, one by one, according to His plan and purpose. And because people are individuals, truth and the Way, though it must come through Me, is revealed in many signs and places, so that a seeker will know the path.

“In many “Christian” countries, it is difficult to be faithful, because there are many temptations and distractions. In other places, believers are persecuted, but they can easily see where I am, and the choice is simple. And those who are willing to search their hearts, will always find Me waiting at the door.

“Now, we are all of us, the whole family of God, together. And the things which I have revealed to each man or woman who listened, may now be shared for the common gain and wealth of spirit.”

“What happens to the people who are atheists, or who blame you for every thing they did?” I asked next. Jesus chuckled:

“Well, about the atheists-“

“Oops, there aren’t any now” I laughed.

“Actually, yes, there are. Fewer, a lot fewer, but some have really convinced themselves that God doesn’t exist, so thoroughly that even direct contact with Me, or the Holy Spirit hasn’t convinced them. The Father would convince them, but they could not stand I His presence, since they have not let go of their sin.

“They are at once, most stubborn, and yet most honest, in their way.

“Now then, the ones who wanted to blame God for everything, they know the truth very well now, and there is none who may blame God for his own evil.”

Jesus fixed His gaze more sternly upon me.

“And that is part of the message I want you to deliver, Daniel.“You will speak to some who will otherwise never hear, but their hearts are hard, hard enough that only a strong word will break in, to be heard because there is no avoiding it or denying it.”As we sped across the plain, I felt a chill despite the warm air rushing by us.

I landed gently, and just stood there for a long time, staring at Jesus. Didn’t He know that I was particularly unqualified for this sort of mission?I must have stared for far too long, for Jesus grew to about 10 feet tall, looked down at me, and with his best DI voice, growled:

“Why are you eye-ballin’ me?”I coughed, looked at the ground, and shrugged. Jesus grew back to normal size, though his hair now had prayer curls like a Hasidic jew.

“Relax. You’ll do fine. Besides, if someone doesn’t accept the message I send with you, that’s on them, not you, okay?“And I’m sending a couple friends with you. We’ll meet up with them in a little bit, after we check out J-town.”

“J-town?” I inquired.Jesus laughed, and pointed to the earth floating the distance.

“Oh, yeah, Jerrrruuuuuuuuuuusalem, but bigger and better. Think of the best parts of London, NYC, LA, any town you want to think of, and then speed it up to something totally original, while still keeping its history and identity. Waay cool, everyone agrees.”

Jesus hopped into the air, and hovered, waiting for me to follow. Since we seemed to be alone, and this place was empty of everything but the yard-wide cracks in the ground, I stepped up and found myself floating with no apparent support. Jesus caught my look, and chuckled.

“Family benefit. Physics are optional for us. Wait until you really get used to your new options!”And Jesus flew off, and I found myself following. Ahead there seemed to be a group of people, and I realized some of them had been the men He had left behind when He first talked with me.One of them approached, and I realized she was a girl, a teenager form her face.

“Master” she asked, “We found Caiaphas, but he won’t come out. I think he might listen to you now, though.”

“Thank you, Bernadette” said the Christ.“Daniel, I need to take some for this task.” said Jesus. ” Bernie and the gang will take you on a tour of Jerusalem, and we can talk more when you get back here.”

And in a blink, He was gone, and I found myself amidst strangers and family, in the same people at once.

I took a look around, and was relieved to find that my new companions seemed to be comfortable with me. Strangely, they weren’t taller than me this time, although I realized that was because I had grown some. When I looked closer at the cracked ground, however, I realized that my increased height meant that the cracks were even larger.The man to my left, grabbed my elbow, and said “Hi Daniel. I’m Judas. Let’s get you over to Jerusalem. You won’t believe how beautiful it is!”

I stared at Judas, and he laughed.“I know, but no, I’m not that one. I’m Judas, son of James. Hey Dad!”

Another man came over, and it hit me that despite being from the 1st Century, they were wearing what looked like white polo shirts and jeans, and sneaks. With gold borders.

“James the son of Zebedee, or James the brother of Jesus?” I asked. James grinned.

“Welllllll, the brother of Jesus, but only the way you are, too. Otherwise, I’m just James, the father of Judas the often-misidentified disciple. And the rest of our gang…“Bernadette, sister from the Sudan”, and he gestured to the teenaged girl Jesus had introduced. She smiled, and pointed to another young man.

“And this is Gregor, from Ukraine. He was raised an atheist, but uhhhh, changed his mind.” The young man was silver haired, despite his youth, and his grin was infectious, as we all grinned back in response. Gregor pointed to another woman, who had been in the back.

"May I introduce Talese? She was a new age medium, but always listened to a voice that helped her love people, support charities, and do good at an amazing number of places. Would you believe she gave sixty gallons of blood during her lifetime? And you won’t meet a more humble person.”

Gregor stopped as Talese shot him a look.

“He knows I don’t need to hear all that yammer about how good this is or that, like I or you are anybody is better than some other person, just ‘cause we do what we should. Hmpf!” said the old lady, though a sparkle in her eye showed amusement at Gregor’s blush.

”Anyway, we’re going to take you on a tour of the rebuilt Jerusalem, though I hear” she peered closely at a man no one had identified yet ”when heaven and earth are made new, it will be even more amazing.

“And to finish up our introductions, though I hope you will take the time to get to know us better, as we hope to know you, these remaining members of our troop are Gail, Chao, Rilka, and Richard.” The three women and the man all nodded, though the man seemed uneasy, which somehow appealed to me. Talese peered at me for a moment

Richard is not allowed to talk to you right now” she said, and Richard looked at the ground, but said nothing, and I wondered what sort of trouble he was into here.“OK” announced Talese. “everyone ready for the jump?”

She looked at me and smiled a little.“You better not plan on things being all logical and scientific here. If you can get your mind open, it will be simple.”

I thought of all the things I had already seen which made no apparent sense, and nodded.

“Good man.” said Talese.“All right everyone, flex-“ and we all hunched down as if readying for a basketball game tipoff, I followed the lead of everyone else,“and jump!”Which we did, and I found us speeding headlong into space, as a memory from some old Science classes feebly protested that our actions were feasible only in comic books.

Flying through space takes some time, even in the alternate physics of this place. As the ten of us flew along, I had memories of old Saturday cartoons, where the heroes flew effortlessly through space, and I wondered if the authors of those shows had somehow glimpsed this future accomodation. I also noticed that we had already entered the skies of Earth, and our orbit was actually comparatively close to the ground, as I could see features in the towns and countries below. I looked over at Judas, who grinned at my unvoiced question.

“You’ll see, Daniel. Just watch.”I sudenly realized that we were flying over North America, and the city we were approaching was New York City. The great city of America’s East Coast seemed to shimmer as we approached, and in a moment, I realized why.As I focused on the city, I became aware at first of its original halls and homes, and in quick sequence I saw the city rise, until it became a fantastic center of light and life. Complete with the World Trade Center, as if September 11 had never happened. I looked over at Judas, and he winked.

“This is a new Earth, rebuilt as it was always meant to be, and as much the work of men as the will of God. “Heaven is all by the will of God, by this Earth, by the Grace of God, allows the hand of man to do good works as well.

“And nothing good is lost, here. All that is wrong and evil has been removed, and all that is good and noble is reclaimed and restored.”I felt like I was going to cry, it was so beautiful.Talese looked over sternly, but softened as she said:“Come, there is much more to see, and we must needs land first at New Jerusalem.”And with that, we flew on.

As we crossed the Atlantic Ocean, I was struck by the marvels of majestic kingdoms and cities we surveyed. As we approached the coast of England, a twinkle caught my from Cornwall, and Talese pulled alongside as I turned to ask;“Is that-”

“Camelot? Indeed, Daniel, it was real, and is again. The jeweled pinnacles of Tintagel are there for all to see, again.

“Off to your right, you can see Joyous Gard, as well, though Lance says he has no wish to set foot there again.”

We flew on to France, where a Paris untouched by war and famine stood, more the City of Light than it had ever been before. I was amazed, as much by the smell of chestnut trees as by the delicate architecture.

Abruptly, we turned South and sped up, and crossed the Mediterranean, and shortly a golden city came into view as we apprached Judea.

Gregor announced the obvious:“New Jerusalem, everyone. The true “City of Gold”, more pity for Cortez.”

We landed before the great gates, and stood in front of the largest city I had ever seen, and greater than I had imagined could exist. The walls alone rose into the skies out of our sight, well hidden by clouds before we could focus on their tops. The walls also streched off to the East and West as far as I could see. It was a finite space, I knew, only because I saw it so from space.

“Ummmm, excuse me” I asked “I sort of knew it would be this big, because I have read Revelation, but does anyone know why New Jerusalem is so huge?”

“Demand” replied Gregor. “This is the Holy City of Earth, and everyone who is able may enter, and so a place has been prepared for all.”

I looked up again at the vast space, and tried to calculate, but failed.“OK, thanks, Gregor” I said, “So, do you know why it’s gold? I mean, it’s pretty as all get-out, but won’t hot days be a big problem, just for one example?”

“Wellllll” replied Gregor, “It’s gold, yes, but it works different here. Here, I’ll show you what I mean. Look at the wall, here and try to see through it.”

I did as her said, and gradually the metal wall became opaque, and I could see the street on the other side. A little more staring, and I could see what was beyond that building as well.“Wow” I finally said.

“I notice that effect only works on the gold, not on the people. I’m rather glad about that, actually.”

Gregor laughed.“Yes, I am, as well.

"So, let’s tour!”As I began to ask how we entered, everyone moved forward, and I followed, as we walked through the walls of New Jerusalem into the city.

Chapter Six: The City of God

2004-11-27T13:43:00.000-08:00

I had expected to be disappointed as we entered the New Jerusalem, as I assumed there would be no way that it could meet the glorious expectations I had read and heard over the years, but if anything, the effect was greater than I could imagine.

I have already said something of the great size of the city, and the sheer magnificence of it. I expected the golden glory to lose its attraction once I had spent some time in it, but I found myself marveling at the cool, soft effect the substance had on my feet, and I looked around d to see if someone could explain it. Chao noticed my expression, and stepped forward.

“The gold used here is different than gold as men have known it, indeed it would have to be” she explained.

“As you can see, more gold has been used here in New Jerusalem than existed before in all the world. Also, the gold men knew was much fought-over, and used in slave trading, robbery, and all manner of vice, so that it would in no way be fit for such Holy purpose.

“This gold, though it looks much like the gold men knew, is different stuff, in that it was made by the virtue and true great goodness of God. Every charity, every act of faith, every hope renewed by kindness, made this gold as a by-product, and His angels have brought it all here, to be built into the Holy City. It is light and pure, and so is the cause of only good effect. No injury will happen in this city, no vile desire, nor even the smallest petty spirit. The gold used here was not for its human value, but to serve the Holy values of God, that there might be a place on Earth where God and Man might truly commune.”

As Chao finished, I saw that our group had formed a circle, and we all sat on a carpet, laid on the floor and made up of a beautifully intricate pattern, which on another occasion might have commanded my attention. But just then James spoke:

“Let us pray”

I bowed my head and waited for him to continue, then realized we were each of us to pray silently. In a further moment, I suddenly realized I could hear everyone’s thoughts in prayer, and joined my own as if part of a dance in words, praising God for His love and hope and grace, and asking His blessing for this place and for each other. It was as if we all formed the same thoughts in the same moment, and in that instant I detected another, the Holy Spirit, moving among us and touching our hearts, ministering to our deepest needs, even when they were unknown to our own minds. The effect of this, somehow, was to unite us in spirit and adoration of the Divine, but without losing our identity, like a note both raised and lowered two octaves to gain both clarity and profundity. We remained ourselves, yet became one greater than the sum of our selves.

I sensed others in different parts of the city joining in, and I realized that others had preceded us in that same chorus of joy and delight. I had, in an instant, the notion that somehow Bach and Mozart, Plato and Pascal, Ellington and Joplin, and other shad glimpsed something of this communion, and each expressed it as they were able.

How long we went on in prayer, I do not know, but it did not matter. When we finished, like the final resolving chord of a hymn, we all rose refreshed and content, as if the prayer had been the best of relaxation and rest, and so it was, for us.The light seemed to come from everywhere, and I realized that we ourselves had become sources of light, either creating it or at least reflecting it on everything and everyone around us.I also learned additional secrets to the city, as we explored. New Jerusalem had something of the same strange physics that we had utilized in coming from Heaven to Earth, and I found we could travel as near or far as we needed to in a single stride. You simply had to set your perspective to the task.You could hear the details of any conversation, by simply stopping and paying close attention. And I realized that every conversation was enthusiastic, hopeful, kind, and happy. This too, fed my spirit.I also saw, that within the walls, New Jerusalem had many vibrant colors, rather than being the monochrome I had expected. Every color was visible in this place or that, although green seemed to be very popular (probably as a complement to the gold).As we walked through the streets, I was impressed by the fact that here were people from every nation and race created by God. As promised in the Bible, none had been forgotten. I saw an Amish couple talking with a Samaritan man, and some Eskimos were kicking a ball back and forth with a group of Thai children.We walked through the city for hours on end, but neither tired nor lost interest. It seemed impossible to become bored or jaded here. My comments here hardly do justice to a place, where it seemed all hopes and dreams were brought to pass.Talese cleared her throat, and we all turned.“It is time to move on, to keep some promises” - she looked pointedly at Gregor, who nodded abruptly, the first solemn look I had seen since we arrived here. Together, we passed again through the walls of New Jerusalem, and I hoped it would not be overlong, before I could return here

As we left New Jerusalem behind, I felt like we were traveling away from the sun. Of course, the visual effects alone could do that, but even so, I felt a drop in energy and mood as we flew back towards Eastern Europe. Looking around, it seemed that most of us felt that way.Except for Gregor. who appeared very eager to see his homeland. And, I noticed, Bernadette also seemed excited to see the former land of the Czars. The others seemed as before, a little depressed to be leaving New Jerusalem behind, although Richard seemed as uneasy as before, and again I wondered about him.Below us, the forests of Bavaria sped by, and I imagined I could see something of the homeland of Bach and Gutenberg, but since everyone was intend on points further East, I decided not to ask if we could stop now. As I regarded Chao, Rilka, Talese, and Richard, I wondered if we might be visiting their homes, as well.

At last, Gregor’s homeland came into view, and I realized we were not bound for Russia, but Ukraine. And what a Ukraine!In books, I had seen something of Kiev and like places, always drab and poor, the people always unhappy and suffering. Not so here!The Kiev we entered was a showplace of celebration and joy, almost like what Walt Disney had hoped for in his theme parks, before the rides and vendors took over the place. And everywhere there were children, more than I had seen in any other place.

This, apparently, was what Bernadette had been eager to see, as she swept up a few children in an eager hug, as more came running. Apparently, some of our group were already well known here, and people greeted us all with broad smiles and enthusiasm. I found, to my great surprise, that I could understand and speak Ukrainian, though I couldn’t and can’t write in that language.We enjoyed a great deal of music and dancing, and a lot of beer and sausage. I felt guilty at first, until Gregor assured me that now, you didn’t get drunk off the beer, and the sausage was not made from any animal. I also discovered, to my relief, that I didn’t get gas anymore.Gregor left us some time during the festival, and I realized he was looking for his family. From his relaxed smile when he returned, I surmised he had found what he hoped to see. Bernadette was very popular with the children, as was Talese, who found herself dancing with them, although she claimed it was ‘foolish and undignified’ for her to do so. I noticed, however, that after she sat down, when the children returned, she did not disappoint them.

A great number of men seemed to recognize Richard and approached him, but he said nothing. James explained that Richard was not allowed to speak, but the men did not accept this from him, and after a while, I had to step in to prevent an argument.

As we walked back to our table, I remarked to James, “You owe me. Later, you gotta tell me what’s up with Richard, OK?” James simply nodded.

After a while, I noticed the children had left us, and asked some of the adults, and they explained the children were sleeping. It was then that I realized that there was no sun, and so no sunset or sunrise. Hours had passed, and there were no shadows to show the passage. I wondered a little at this, but I was not tired, and there seemed much more to do and sing, so I noted the thought, and together we praised God and celebrated the new life in this good Earth.

Perhaps the strangest effect of this new earth wasn’t how the physics of space were different here, but time was altered as well, somehow. I realized that a great deal of time had passed, and what seemed like hours to me, may well have been weeks, even years!I wondered what the children had dreamed about. I was curious to see if I could sleep and find out for myself, but I wasn’t tired. It seemed that everything I did in this new world was a matter of choice, even eating and resting. I wouldn’t have been surprised to find it so in Heaven, but here it seemed very strange.I wondered about the men who had confronted James, and I was puzzled. I had the distinct impression that the men had almost been to the point of fighting James, and his behavior seemed to indicate that he believed the same. Could men still sin here?Bernadette came over to me as Talese began to gather our group together. Apparently we were getting ready to leave Kiev. Bernadette sat down next to me, and I realized we had a little while.“I see something troubles you” she said, and she touched my hand with her long, cool fingers. Suddenly, I felt very much out of place, but Bernadette’s intense gaze allowed me no escape.

“I thought -” I began, and Bernadette encouraged me on with a kind look.

“I thought sin was to be no more, but now I fear that men may still sin.

“If so, I worry how I may conduct myself. I might lose all I have gained!”

I worried for a moment that Bernadette might laugh, but she shook her head and smiled gently.

“I worry the same, my friend.” she said. “But there is better hope for us than before.

“Stop for a moment, take your peace, and contemplate your heart.”

It seemed kind of a zen thing for a nun to say, but I had no better answer, so I paused, took a breath, closed my eyes, and looked within.For a few moments I sensed nothing but my passing confusion, and I almost thought the peace of reflection and introspection was what Bernadette meant. Then, of a sudden, I saw my own heart of spirit, and within its halls, seated sideways on a comfortable-looking chair, which looked suspiciously throne-like, was Jesus Christ.

“Hi Daniel!” said Jesus [He actually used my *new* name, but I’m not writing it here]. “I like what you’ve done with the place, especially kicking out the idols and hedonism.Go on back to Bernadette, we can talk later.”

I waved sheepishly, shrugged, and opened my eyes. Bernadette was looking closely at me, with an amusement I didn’t understand, until I suddenly realized that every believer had Jesus in his/her heart, literally. Such a presence would be proof against temptation, so long as we kept Him there. I had heard it enough in sermons, but to actually be able to see Him there was something else entirely.

“This is an advantage for everyone who has accepted Christ. They never walk alone, and need never face temptation or evil without defense.

“Not that you will find many who sin here now. Satan has been chained, so no one is encouraged to do wrong, except he chooses it plainly by himself. What’s more, there is much to prevent deception. I will not tell you to try to deceive, but if you were to try, you would now find it very difficult to evade the truth. This place now is one where honesty and virtue are plainly understood and seen, and everyone openly chooses their course. Everyone has enough time, enough resources, and those who would work together, can do so now with no fear of fraud or theft.” A short distance away, we saw Talese sternly wave us over. It was time to move on.

As we flew from Kiev, I realized I was better able to control my flight. So I sped up a little to even up with James, who nodded to me.

“You want to know about Richard?” he asked.

“Yes, of course” I confirmed.

“But I also wanted to ask you about perspective. Is it me, or is everything bigger on this new Earth?”

James laughed.“Yes, everyone picks up on that in a little while. Part of it is, we are in a greater reality, and by greater, I mean the scale and depth is kicked up some. But also, this Earth has to be able to show every good thing done in its history, and that really adds up to quite a lot.

“Kiev, for instance. It was a lot bigger than you remember, right?”

I nodded.“Well, there’s more than a thousand years of history in that city, and for all the evil that men did, there was a lot of love, alot of compassion, a lot of hope and good that was made there, and it all needs to be available for anyone who lived there before, or visits now.

“Look at the city lights below!”

I immediately understood what James meant. Flying over Eastern Europe and Western Asia before, I had always been struck by how dark and dismal that part of the world was. Now, lights twinkled below as if expressing joy and humor which had been too-long suppressed.

James continued his explanation:“It also contains the space for its potential. You won’t believe what Vegas looks like!”

I laughed, thinking how James might be impressed by all the lights and glamour, but he caught my thought and laughed back.

“Ohhhh no, no casinos, and none of the sex stuff!

“I mean that Las Vegas had a ton of potential, and now that all the deceit and temptation has been removed, the people there can really explore its possibilities. You do know, that Las Vegas has more churches per capita, than any other city on the continent?”

I suddenly realized what James was saying, and I was now eager to see what kind of turnaround Vegas had made.

“Thanks” I said. “Now, about Richard. Why isn’t he allowed to speak, and why did those men come up on him in Kiev like that?”

“I can’t tell you everything, Daniel,” said James, “but I can say this: Richard was a man of some dominion in his life, and he was able to sway people with speech.“Talese received orders from the Boss, and it seems that Richard needs to think long and hard about what he did with his talents, lest he get into trouble again too quickly.

“She’ll speak to you about it, though, before you go back to Hell.”

I shot a look at James, but he was getting ready to land, as we all approached the Northeastern Chinese village of Liaoyang. Chao’s obvious excitement showed the clear reason for this stop.

Liaoyang was smaller than I expected, given James’ explanation that every place would contain all of its people and history. The whole of the village could hold only a few thousand, so in its prime, it must still have been modest, indeed.But as I walked around, I became aware of something else about the village, which was greater than Kiev’s majesty.

Almost everyone seemed to be connected to someone else. The family connections which I had observed in Kiev (a slight, invisible but discernable line between people) between family members was very common here, and I realized that friends in Liaoyang were as close as family in Kiev, and family in Liaoyang was very strong here indeed! I had the impression that these were bonds of devotion and caring beyond any I had seen before, and I counted myself blessed to be able to see it.We allowed Chao to find her family, while we met with the village people. There was no festival as we had seen in Kiev, but all the same, we were made to feel welcome, and by the Grace of God’s planning, we found ourselves again able to speak easily, in some common language I found I knew, though I had never heard it before. A light, musical dialect, which in some ways reminded me of Cantonese, though it was not structured like it. A whim took me on a tour of the village, and in a few moments I was alone.

I heard a voice call out, and thinking it was one of he village children, I turned-And was struck full in the face with something fast, round, muddy, and hard in the middle. I had been mudballed!

I suddenly realized the voice had called out “Nyaha!” just before impact, as if to make sure I got it right in the face.

Suddenly, I heard it again:”Nyahaa!”

I knew better, but turned anyway when I heard the voice, and again received a mudball on the side of my head.I whirled around, but saw no one. My attacker had complete advantage.

I decided that numbers were always a good thing to have, so I tried to casually return to our group, and got hit three more times on the head and shoulders by my assailant before I saw the group again. When they saw me, I was immediately the center of attention. Rilka giggled a little bit, Richard looked like he wanted to say something, but was stopped by Talese, and Gregor handed me a towel, as two more missiles came in, and everyone gave me room. Talese peered at me for a long moment, then chuckled.

“Well, are you going to tell me you like getting hit with mud, or are you going to take care of your problem?” she inquired.

“Of course I want to fix this” I replied, as another missile and taunt landed on my ear. “Can you tell me what’s going on?”

“That should be obvious” Talese replied. ”Somebody wants to make you face a problem they have with you, and the Lord has decided to let you two square matters yourselves.”

“Fine” I said. “Why is it I didn’t get any warning, and why are they allowed to hit me without me even seeing them?”

Talese shrugged.“Guess you’ll find out when you take care of this.” she replied. ”Go ahead and clear this matter up, and we’ll wait for you.

“But be sure you don’t bring back that mud thrower here. I have no taste for these games!”

I muttered to myself as yet another mudball came in.

“And I do?” I asked under my breath, but at least I was able to duck this pitch.

My one-sided game of mudball became even less amusing, when I decided to try to evade my assailant. I had a thought, to jump/fly into the air, and so evade my attacker, but this time, when I jumped, I cleared a few inches, then - plunk -back on the ground. After a few tries, my attacker apparently, realized my limit, and the barrage of mud increased its pace and viscosity; I got the distinct impression my opponent was spitting on the mudballs now, before throwing them.I tried to run, I tried to duck, and somehow each new hit found a new place. I began to wonder where I could find a hot shower.I began to lose hope that I could handle this situation. I was out-positioned, out-supplied (the guy never seemed to run out of mud – he must have been launching from Boston), and I still had no idea what was going on.

“Pssssssssssssssssssst!”I looked to my right, and saw Richard waving at me, from inside a window.

“Pray!” he ordered, which seemed so strange, that I didn’t think he was serious. I began to think this was why they wouldn’t let Richard talk; maybe he liked to make fun of people in trouble.Another mudball accentuated the thought, as it landed on the back of my head, accompanied by the now-traditional cheer of derision.

”Pray!It will work!” He said again, and I realized he meant it. Well, a salvo of spit-covered mudballs had removed any real self-consciousness from me, so I hit the knees.

A few more landed on me, now an easy target, as I tried to think about what I should say.

“Lord, please remove from me this plague of mud?”

I heard motion to my right again, and realized that Richard had come out from the house.“Ask Jesus to help you know what to do” commanded Richard, and he wielded a large stick, like a baseball bat. For a moment I worried about my safety, but as the next mudball came in, Richard parried it neatly away, like a foul ball, and I realized he was buying me some time at risk to his own decorum. I also wondered if his help would get him in trouble. So I lowered my head, and I asked Jesus to show me the way.

For some time, I saw and felt nothing, but somehow I understood that I was to wait. As I did, I heard the whoosh of incoming mudballs, and the ’splut’ of Richard batting them away.Then I had a vision in my mind, of a young man I knew years before. I vaguely remembered him, then it came back to me, and I knew not only what had caused this situation to come about, but what I had to do.

I stood up straight, opened my eyes, and now, far in the distance, I could see him.

“OK, Mac” I called out. “Let’s talk!”

And I jumped in his direction, this time able to fly as before, although I trailed mud behind me.

Behind me I heard Richard call out ”Good Luck!”, and before me I heard Mac cry in alarm, and turn to run away, but I knew I would catch up to him.

I flew the distance between us, and tried to think of how I would resolve this situation. As I did, I became aware that I had no clue about what would settle the matter, but I realized that Richard had given me the answer already. So as I approached Mac, I drew within myself , and asked Jesus for His blessing on my effort, for His direction to my heart and mind, and His peace on the situation I was about to enter. If nothing else, I felt him calm my spirit, although I could swear I also heard Him remark ”It could be worse – there’s another guy in a similar situation, but he’s dealing with – well something not so nice as mud!”

I landed on an island, eerily reminiscent of a scene from a James Bond film. I knew Mac was here somewhere, but he had hidden himself before I arrived.The island was very quiet. I heard no animals, no birds, no insects even. Fortunately, for the moment, no mudballs or taunts either.I thought about Mac, and what had caused him to hate me. It was my fault, of course. Mac Lennon had been a friend of mine years ago, when we were both children. We had both had been harassed by bullies in our school. To my shame, I had discovered that the bullies would let me be, so long as I helped them bully Mac. I knew it was wrong, even as a 9-year old, but I went in with the bullies. I’d told Mac later, that I was sorry, but that really didn’t undo what I had done, and we had never been friends again. The strange thing was, Mac came from a very wealthy and powerful family. When he grew up, Mac had inherited a large company and lots of money, and he was smart and tenacious enough to build it up to even greater power and influence. I had heard it said, that Presidents of countries had to wait for Mr. Lennon’s convenience, when they wanted to see him, and absolutely no one laughed at him or demeaned him. Why, with all that power and success, was Mac chucking mudballs at me and laughing like a deranged prankster? As I thought about it further, I realized that maybe, after all these years, what Mac wanted were the things denied him when he didn’t enjoy influence and prestige.

And in a flash, I knew what I had to do.

“Alright, Mac” I cried out to the island. “I’m here. Say what you want to say, and do what you need to do. I’m right here”

Immediately, a barrage of mudballs came in again, and after the break, they were as nasty as before, but I didn’t move, and I said nothing. Just stood there in a rain of mud, and waited.Mac had a lot of mud to go through. After a while I couldn’t keep my mind from wandering just a little, and I wondered where he was getting all of this mud. I also wondered how he could keep it up this long. I had lost track of time, but I was sure he had been at it for hours, throwing mud and screaming.And getting closer, I realized. I took a mental breath, and prepared myself.

Finally, Mac came into view. He stopped when he saw I wasn’t running or ducking. He giggled for a while, to see me coated in slimy mud, but his face darkened to see I wasn’t properly angry or afraid.

“You’re not following the rules!” cried Mac, but I didn’t answer that.

“You’re suposed to be humiliated, like I was!” yelled Mac.

“I am humiliated” I answered. “Not because of the mud, but because I caused you such pain, Mac. I am sorry, and wish I had never done it.”

“Not good enough!” cried Mac, and he let loose with another barrage of mud. I realized that he was making the mud out of his own spite, and I wondered how it must feel to harbor that in your heart. I dismayed to recall, though, that this spite was of my making, however unintended. I lowered my head.

“Stop that!” ordered Mac, “I’m the victim, not you!”

“I know, and I’m sorry” I replied. This time, Mac stopped throwing mud, and turned to look at me from an angle.

“Really?” he asked. “Has it kept you awake, knowing what you did, wondering what you should have done, what you could do to make it up?”

“Actually, yes I did, Mac.” I answered. “Not for many years, I admit, but after I grew up and matured, I really wanted to say I was sorry.

“But by then you had private residence and unlisted numbers. I never had the kind of influence people needed to talk to you. You became important, and no one saw you unless you asked first.”

“There is that” allowed Mac, and he let a handful of mud slip from his hands. For a while neither of us said anything, but I knew the next word had to be his. Finally, Mac pointed to a nearby bench.

“Let’s talk, OK?”

We sat and Mac let out a long history of anguish and self-rebuke. I understood, at a level I never had before, how even a casual insult could hurt so deeply that a life could be derailed by it, and I wanted to punch myself. I had done a number of good things in the later part of my life, and relatively few cruel things. So, I had convinced myself that all in all, I was a pretty decent sort. Now, I understood that just because I could forget about things I had done long ago, it didn’t take away their wrong, or the pain they caused, or the damage . I started to cry, and after a few moments (I was covered in mud, after all), Mac hugged me, and told me he was sorry, and it was going to be all right. Somehow, we both got the idea to pray, and for a moment, I worried about messing things up. Mac was Roman Catholic, after all, and I was a dumb Protestant who vaguely remembered the Catholics had some different prayers, but I didn’t know any of them. Fortunately, we ended up praying together for Christ’s forgiveness, understanding, and to renew our friendship.

In that moment, he was with us, and I saw Him lay His hands on Mac’s shoulders, looking deep into his eyes.

“Well done, good friend and faithful servant. Be at peace, and enter in to the joy I have prepared for you.”

Mac grinned, waved at me, and said, “See you later, Daniel.“Good luck, and I’ll catch uip with you later on, OK?”

With that, he vanished, and I knew Mac was in Heaven. Jesus turned back to me, and I wondered what He might say. I sure could use a blessing right then.

Jesus smiled, and said to me, “Whew! You need a shower!”

When I came out from my shower, cleaning the last (hopefully) of the mud from my ears and hair, I saw Jesus waiting for me, as He hop-scotched across a grid which, I realized, had written phrases in place of numbers.As I came closer, I realized they were the Ten Commandments.Hearing me approach, Jesus stopped. On Commandment #9, I saw.

“That’s better.” He observed, “In more ways than one.”

“I know” I answered. “Out of curiosity, how much of this is your plan, or am I affecting this by my own will somehow?”

Jesus grinned.

“A little of both. You are doing My will now, because - finally - you are obeying Me. But this path was determined to resolve your own issues.

“It wouldn’t make much sense for you to go around resolving someone else’s issues, at least while your own are stil out there.”

I grimaced, and Jesus chuckled.

“It’s not all that bad” He assured me.“You are doing what I command now, which is certainly to the good, and it’s helping you grow.

“You’ll need that for some of the tasks still ahead of you. But now that you’ve finished here, I shall send you back to Talese and the others. They have been waiting a while, and it’s time you spoke for Richard, else he will be scorned wrongly.Jesus put his hand on my shoulder, and looked me in the eye. This time, I managed not to flinch.“What I send you now to do, I give also strength and support sufficient to your need. Remember that, when the time comes that you may otherwise doubt.”

I heard movement from behind me, and turned to see I was back in China. I turned back, and Jesus was gone.

Talese stepped forward, and crossed her arms.“Well, at least you smell better” she said. “Now, what is this I hear about you letting Richard talk?”

nodded, and stepped over to Richard, who looked as though he had been having a hard time of things.

“Yes, Richard was very helpful to me” I said. “While you and the others just wanted me to go away and not bother you with my trouble, Richard chose to help.

“Whatever he has done wrong, in this he was a friend to me.”

Richard brightened and straightened his shoulders. The others looked embarassed and stared at the ground, except for Talese, who scowled at me, but I held her gaze quietly, and after a few seconds, she looked away and coughed.

“I saw the Lord speaking with you a little while ago” she said. “I suppose you know where we will go next?”

And as she asked, I realized that I did.

The others looked at me expectantly. ”Richard and I will be going to Hell, along with a friend of mine” I said, and I inwardly chuckled at their reaction. “Everyone else will continue. Richard will be with you later on,” (at which comment, Richard relaxed) “but I don’t know if I will be able to rejoin you during this trip or not. I would like to, but there is much to do now.”

Judas laughed “Don’t we know it!” he said. ”I heard all my life, how the next life was supposed to be easy and relaxing.”

I laughed back. “Hey, I’m having fun!”

Talese peered at me quietly.“Are you sure about this?” she demanded. I saw the concern in her eyes.

“Thanks, Talese. Yes, I’m sure, and yes, we’ll be fine. Thank you for thinking about us.”

"Hmpf. Just don’t get stuck there” said Talese.“Looks like your ride’s here.”

I turned, and Jesus was walking into our group, with someone I had not seen for years.

“Ready?” He asked us.

I knelt down, and hugged my old friend Arf, the dog I had back in high school. She was delighted to see me, and both she and Richard seemed pleased to meet each other. I stood up and nodded, aware of backpacks which had appeared by our feet.

“Very ready” I confirmed.

“Then be about My work” He commanded us, with a smile.

“Go with my blessing, commission, and ministry.”

Jesus put one hand on my shoulder, the other on Richard’s, and I felt us move to the dank, cold regions of the damned. For all my confidence and trust, I inwardly took a deep breath, and prayed I wouldn’t screw this up.We found ourselves in a warm, rancid cavern. Distant screams could be heard. I knew we were on a deeper level than the one I had seen before, and there was real danger here.

ichard and I looked at each other, then we put on our backpacks. I suddenly realized I was wearing a white jumpsuit, with gold lightning bolts up the seams. I felt a little like Elvis, but I knew if I started singing, my companions would laugh or leave very quickly.

Richard looked at me with a gimlet eye.“I help you with your problem, and you thank me by yanking me along, on your field trip to the Inferno?” he inquired.

“Chill out” said Arf, in a much deeper voice than I remembered from her. ”There’s a reason for everything, and you know how little of your walk you have done so far.”

Richard looked at the ground again, and I wondered how much I knew, against what I might need to know. Arf cocked her head at me and smiled.

“C’mon, Pookah.” she said, ”We got work to do, so let’s get going”

“Pookah?” I inquired.“Hey sure, if you can name me after a cartoon dog in a comic strip, I can call you whatever I want.” answered the dog.

“So, what do you want me to call you?” I asked. “It’s not as if you could tell me before.”Besides, you know my dad named you, not me.”

The dog chuckled.

“Just teasing.” she replied. ”Remember, although I had my identity, I didn’t have a name like humans do when I was on Earth.“And I can’t tell you my new name Jesus gave me, so how about you just call me ‘Arf’, until I think of something I like better.”

I nodded, and we moved out. A swirling wind whipped us with hot, then cold gusts, and the smells alternated with each blow between fetid and a sharp sour stench.I heard feet running towards us in the dim light, and I felt my clothing stiffen and turn hard, like the enameled plastic of a football helmet. Glancing to the side, I saw Arf and Richard similarly protected, as something small and light bounced off my hip. A few others arrived with the same effect. Then hundreds more fell into us, a screaming mass of futility and after a few minutes of this, I saw Richard start to laugh at the sheer lunacy of all this. I knew a bit about what was going on, though, and I waved him off. He nodded and stopped laughing, but grinned despite himself.The leader of this small army glared up at me, a caricature of every noble virtue I had seen on a human face. Now I had to struggle to keep from laughing at this arrogant little man. I thought about where we were, and the stakes, took a deep breath, and addressed the group.

“Hello, my brothers. Are you lost?”

Chapter Seven: Richard

2004-11-27T07:05:00.000-08:00

The group looked at me with surprise, while their leader glared with rage. Two or three seemed about to speak, but their cut them off with a snarl.

“Surrender, foul demon!” he commanded. For few seconds we stood there, as I tried to think of an appropriate response. Arf, for her part, was trying very hard not to break into laughter. But Richard seemed ready for this man.

“Hello, Pretender” announced Richard, and the little man stepped back. Richard seized the moment, stepping forward, his face becoming more severe and his stature seemed to increase.

“And hello, fools!” he continued, and the crowd grew uneasy.

“Yes, fools!” repeated Richard. ”Just look at your condition.

“I don’t know what this little liar has been telling you, but if any of you would take a moment and just look around, you can see how he has led you down.”

At this, the little man started to rise in complaint, but I ordered him silent with a motion. I understood why I had been given this power now, but I couldn’t help but wish I had been able to exercise it when I had been a parent.

Some of the crowd saw what I did, and they became uneasy. Richard continued with his speech, describing in great detail the torments of Hell, and implying in every sentence that the group was here because their leader had blinded them to God and heaven, which was rather close to the truth. I wondered idly what result Richard would lead them to, though I had confidence in his purpose and ability. Then I roused myself, mentally shrugged, and went over to the little leader, who glowered at me in silence.“Come with me” I ordered, and slowly, resisting the force which compelled him to obey, he came to his feet and followed me down the pathway, as the group watched us lead.

After we were far enough away from the others, that we could no longer hear Richard, and so could not ourselves be heard, I released the man from his compulsion. He immediately attacked me with a flurry of blows and insults. He could not hurt me, though, so for a time I let him vent and work his anger out. His selection of verbiage began to become annoying when he started repeating himself, so after I had given him time enough to express himself, I raised my hand and told him “bide”.

He froze, like a statue, and for a moment I considered my next words. I started with the obvious:

“You’re in a lot of trouble, brother.”

He couldn’t move, but his eyes answered in hate.

I continued: “And in case you’re wondering, no, you’re not going back to them.

“They will choose for themselves. For good or ill, this is no longer your group or control.”

I paused, looking deep within the man, and saw what I knew I would see. I took a deep breath, and continued:

“I know who you are, and what you were, and what you have chosen to become.

“I know how you were give love, but killed it.

“I know how you were given great opportunity, but used it to hate and harm.“I know your choice, even though you hid it from everyone around you, until you could reach into every life around you and destroy hope and joy wherever you found it.

“I have brought you to judgment, as it is required.”

I knew he had to speak at this point, so I released him then. The man spat at me and hissed.

“You!” he howled. ”You are not fit to judge me!”

“Of course I am not fit to judge you” I returned.

“But you will be judged, all the same.”

I gestured at the walls, then back to the man.

“You have cast away mercy. So then, receive justice, as the will of God commands!”

The man glared at me, then suddenly spun around, seeing and hearing tormentors no one else could perceive. I knew just enough to feel pity for him, but also enough of his evil to know he had long ago rejected any chance to be brought back. He howled, perhaps to see a woman he had molested while “counseling”, cowered from facing a man whose life’s savings he had “invested” for him. Somehow, this man had long ago chosen his fate. While it was possible that he might yet face his demons and be reconciled, if that was to happen, the road for this one would be long and vary hard. But at least he was removed from his ability to lead others to destruction.I turned to head back to join Richard and the group. I wondered how his message was being received.As I approached, I heard singing and music. Richard looked like a corporate Hari Krishna, banging away on a tambourine he had produced from somewhere.But while most of the group was dancing and singing along with Richard, not everyone was happy. I saw several people not joining in, and I gathered them together to the side.

"OK, one at a time, what’s your beef?” I asked.

The most annoyed of the group shoved his way to the front.

“You chased off our leader, and your friend can’t even sing” he thumbed over at Richard, “And I have no idea what you’re up to, but judging by how you sacked our boss, I figure you plan on taking his place. Sorry, but I’m not real filled with confidence in you.”

I chuckled. “Take a good look around”

As they did, I continued.“Your former leader used his ability to lead you into Hell itself. You have your own choice to make, but at least I can promise I won’t make things worse.

“Besides, as I think Richard will have told you” - they look over at Richard, who now appeared to doing a mamba - “I’m not trying to lead you. My job here was just to get you off that guy’s hook. If you really want to follow that guy, he’s still around” - I nodded in the direction of the screaming - “and you can catch up to him. But at least you can make up your own mind.”

“And hey, you can always ask directions from the enlightened and beautiful talking dog” added Arf. I was surprised, as three of them went off with her, apparently to do just that.

The man did not seem real happy, but he said nothing more, and sat down, apparently waiting to hear from someone else. A woman stepped forward.

“Look, who are you, anyway? No offense, but you look like Mr. Clean meets Evil Knievel, and since you made it clear you don’t like men setting themselves up as idols, so why should we follow you?”

“OK, I understand the confusion” I answered. “It’s not about you following me. After all, I’m just a man, no matter how I’m dressed, or anything else.

“I’m here as a messenger, and on a special mission. In fact, I have to move on with Richard, but Arf can help you with directions to the New Earth.

“I have to warn you; since your leader led you here in defiance of Christ, you will all have to face Judgment. I won’t say it’s gonna be fun for everyone, but you have a choice, basically: Mercy or Justice.”

The woman grimaced. “Do we end up with white jumpsuits, like you?”

“I dunno” I answered, “but I don’t think God is fashion-hostile.”

“OK, but I’m confused” asked another guy. “We followed Reverend Gulk because he seemed so real. I couldn’t buy into Jesus, because He was just some guy from old stories, y’know?

“I mean, after all this, I guess we believe what you’re saying, but how can we know what’s really going on? I mean, it probably sounds crazy to you, but what if it could get worse?”

I tried not to laugh at the irony. “Actually, it could get worse. This is only the Second level of Hell. If you want to see worse, wait until you see the 'Land of the Congressmen and Telemarketers'. "

I got a lot of blank stares.“OK, time for something to change the pace” announced Arf.

“And Dan, if I hear Richard sing another Gospel ditty to the tune of ‘Play That Funky Music’ again, you’ll have to clean up the nausea”

“I heard that” sang out Richard. “Just one more verse...”

After Richard finally finished his stage show, and the pilgrims followed Arf off to the way station to discover their individual courses, I paused to speak with Richard.

“I’m proud of how you handled yourself” I said, and Richard laughed.

“You liked my singing?” he asked.

“You know what I meant, I think” I told him. “It would have been real easy for you to, to tell everyone what they should do. Instead, you let them make up their own minds.”

Richard shrugged. ”Actually, it wasn’t very hard at all” he said.

“When I saw how those people were being fooled, so badly and for so long, that they couldn’t even get free from Hell, well, the last thing I wanted to do was put anyone back into bondage.“

“I know, and I’m very happy with that. I know the Lord is, too.” I told him.

“Well,” grinned Richard, ”I really have a lot to pay back, since I was a pretty lousy Quaker”

We laughed together, as one last fellow from the group walked up to us.

“Hello” he began, ”I was wondering if I could follow you for a time, maybe learn some things”

Richard frowned and shook his head.

“That might not be real wise, son.” He said. ”You just got out from a bad situation, which came because you let someone else give you your answers. I think you need to learn on your own.”

“But I know what to watch for now” insisted the young man. “And I won’t be fooled again”

“What’s your name, son?” I asked the young man, as I heard Richard mutter-sing ”meet the new boss … same as the old boss…”

“John Andrew.” Answered the fellow.“OK, then” I answered. “To start off, I’m Daniel, and please don’t get the idea I have all the answers.

“I was sent here to perform a mission, and some of it is strange even to me. But If you want to come along, that’s fine, but do I presume correctly: You have not yet had your judgment?”

John squirmed nervously. “Yes, that’s right, sir.”

“Don’t call me ‘sir’, I’m not a State Trooper, and I’m not going to judge you” I said.

“But you sent Reverend Gulk running and screaming” said John.

“Actually, Reverend Gulk sent himself running and screaming” I said. “I just made him face the truth, since he was leading so many away from God. I don’t have the same job with you.

“I can’t say it’s not scary” I said, remembering my own session with the King, “but He won’t cheat you or trick you, or look for a reason to banish you from God’s love.”

The man remained nervous. “I’d still like to hang around with you, unless it makes you mad”

I laughed at that. “Believe me, it’s not a problem. But I have to warn you, between my bad jokes and Richard’s bad singing, you may get tired of us pretty quick.

“And of course, we have to spend more time here in Hell, which doesn’t speak well for us having much to be merry about. But when Arf gets back, the social quality will certainly improve.”“I meant to ask you about that” said John Andrew.

“Is the talking dog your familiar?”

I stopped and stared at John, while Richard laughed, and slapped John Andrew on the back.

“No, John” he said, ”that would be the other team’s tactics. Arf is our friend and companion, and a follower of Christ as sure as any human.”

So we proceeded down the trail towards the dank pits of the Inferno.

Richard looked back at the cavern as we walked along the ledge.

“Hey Dan, how will Arf know where to find us?” he asked.

“Not a problem” I answered. “Arf is always able to find her way around.

“And since she’s able to lead pilgrims from Hell to the gates before Heaven, I know she’ll be able to track us down with no difficulty.”

After a little while, we heard screaming and wailing ahead of us, and I stopped to speak to the others.

“Richard, this part will be difficult for you, because you are a pacifist." I told him.

“John Andrew, you need to stay back from this place, because where we’re going next is a place of great danger for you at this time.”

Both Richard and John protested my words.“C’mon, Dan” said Richard, ”I’m a pacifist now, but you know I understand the need for force.”

“And I’m not afraid of getting beat up” protested John. ”I mean, what are they gonna do, I’m already dead!”

I shook my head at John. “It’s not that kind of danger, John” I said “Since you have not had your judgment, you may not yet be reconciled with the Father. If so, you may be putting your soul in peril by trying what I am about to do. Later, you will do as much, and more, should it be required, but here and now, the time is not here yet.”

John lowered his eyes, and I faced Richard.“Richard, I know what you are able to do. But you know what we are about to step into, and rage is very dangerous here, even if it is necessary. Here, we must do exactly what is required; no less, but also no more.

“Join me in prayer, please.”

And we prayed, for courage and strength and success, but first and most for guidance, direction, and to be right with the Father in this work.When we stood, a company of angels were at our back, and I wouldn’t have felt more secure with a company of Marines.I felt my clothing stiffen again into protective armor, and I felt a weapon heavy at my side. I drew my sword as we turned the corner and faced a gathering of beings wrought from the visions of madmen. Perhaps a thousand of them were there, demons as few had ever seen in the face, and I could tell by their haughtiness, none yet had ever defeated them in combat, though their chief was already in the pit. They each held one or two people, by the arm or by the throat, and they had been torturing them in horrible ways, as was their sport.

I pulled a heavy load of chains from a sack at my side, and threw the links onto the ground between us.

“Closing time” I called out. “This dance is over.”

There was a moment of silence, as if the demons did not hear me, then as if they did not believe me. I realized that for the moment, they saw only me and Richard, and thought the fight was between us alone.Then they charged, leaving their tormented victims aside for their new attention, and I braced to meet them. My sack became a shield, and Richard and I kneeled to better take the blow when they arrived.Just before they hit, I said a Word, and as the first row was blown back by its force, I let them see the angels with me. It’s a strange thing to hear something built like a cross between a wrestler and a rhino, shriek in terror.The second wave swept over us, and the battle was on.

If it ever falls to you to do batle with legions of the damned, I recommend staying far away from the media and entertainment while you prepare. Television and the movies have done a terrible job of describing the conditions and appropriate tactics.For one thing, there are no magic weapons which make evil beings poiltely puff into smoke; in fact you cannot kill beings which do not live in the normal sense. Essentially, there are only three ways to do battle effectively with demonic creatures:

* God can banish, contain, or pretty much do whatever He wants to anyone. Not surprisingly, demons tend to avoid the Holy One;
* You can ask God for the means to make them flee the person or place they occupy;
* You can ask God to grant you the means to whip them into submission.

Since I am not God, option 1 was right out. Since we were already in Hell, there really was no other place for them to flee, so we were left with #3. I was about to find out whether my plan constituted a faithful obedience to the Lord’s will, or a painful mistake.Of course,having a hundred angels at your side does wonders for your confidence, and I also found myself thinking back to Sgt. Dietrich in thanks: Years ago, when I was young, dumb, and a Marine, I didn’t know the dangers of volunteering, and agreed to train as a boxer for the regiment’s competition. Sgt. Dietrich had a unique, and very personal method for training his athletes.

In my case, he ordered me to do road runs every morning for 5 miles. Marines do that anyway, so I didn’t see the special advantage, so I complied.

About three klicks into the run, I learned Sgt. Dietrich’s accent on the exercise: A large, angry, actually very angry dog was after me. It took me a long time to lose him and complete the run. Sgt. Dietrich wasn’t impressed with my reason for my poor road time:

“Of course there was a dog after you! Do you think you can win in the ring by running away?”

Sgt. Dietrich made clear to me his expectations: I had to run the same route every morning before my regular PT, and I wouldn’t pass until I completed the 5 miles in 30 minutes or less, and only if I made it without any visible damage from the dog. I later learned that Sgt. Dietrich had arranged for a trainer wearing my clothes to torment the dog, while wearing a mask with a photo of my face. He was also careful with the dog; a fierce mastiff, reluctant to kill but eager to bite. The dog was fast enough that I had to face it, big enough that I couldn’t ignore it without damage from its bites and claws, and mean enough not to quit easily. I finally learned that to pass the test, I had to be ready for an attack at all angles and times, to run quickly enough to limit the number of passes the dog could make and to make my time, but slow enough that I could have energy to turn and face the animal. I also learned to strike the dog hard on its snout - it always stopped the dog and gave me time to choose my next move, whether to run or strike again. I eventually made my run bite-free in 29 minutes, and Sgt. Dietrich found other ways to torment me in my training. But I found myself thinking that the training would also be useful here.

I felt a close rush of air as Richard’s mace swung very close to my head, connecting instead with a wing of a charging demon, a distinct type from many of the others, but I never bothered to study up on the various types and models of demons. The fact that Richard’s mace deflected him from sinking a pike into me was satisfactory.

“You mind saving your happy reveries until after we defeat this horde of mindless, soulless, hateful - say, this really does bring back memories. I feel like I’m watching the ‘68 Democratic Convention!” said Richard.

“Even so,” he continued, ducking another monster and tossing it over his shoulder into the face of another one, “you’re acting like your playing for an audience, and it’s creeping me out.”

“Sorry” I said, as I chopped into the chest of another demon, pivoting him into knocking down two others. “Bad habit, I admit.”

“Whatever” answered Richard, “as long as you don’t make me feel like I’m doing all the work here.”

“Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, Richard, what about our back-up here?” I asked, nodding at the angels surrounding us in the melee.

“Yeah, they’re pretty good -” acknowledged Richard, as an angel karate-chopped one demon, jumped into the air and kicked two others in the neck simultaneously, then as he descended pushed himself off the body of one into another approaching demon, slashing with a dagger he had ready in his sleeve - “but I always feel more comfortable around people I think might live on the same planet I do”

I chuckled as I riposted a demon’s taloned blade with my sword, then flexed him into a cavern wall, which obligingly rumbled, and a few small stones fell free and onto the head of the demon. He snarled at me, and Richard banged him with the mace to teach him some manners.

“You know, Richard, not that I’m playing to them,” I said, “but we do have an audience, you know”, and I shrugged at the demons’ victims who had been dropped at our arrival.

“Don’t remind me” replied Richard, “You think they might want to do more than just stand around?”

“Well, let’s see” I said. “Maybe it’s because none of them are armed, or maybe it’s because none of them knows the right thing to do here, or maybe it’s because they’ve never seen demons or angels in person before, let alone so many.”

“Yeah, maybe” said Richard, “but I still think I would do something in their shoes.”

“Yes, we all have our own demons to wrestle” I replied, “but we usually get to do that one at a time, don’t we?“And” I reminded Richard, “don’t forget that they are the reason we are here just now, and not just to exercise.”

“Whatever” said Richard, as he swung his mace like a nun-chuk behind his head into another infernal face. I wondered if it was a good or a bad thing, to be enjoying myself in this situation.

Now, as a concept, battling evil sounds very cool to a lot of people, and as a result gains much attention in the works of great authors and bad directors. In reality, however, it’s hard, wearing, annoying work, kind of like trying to get rid of cockroaches from your house. Vanquishing a demonic legion in Hell only makes things worse.I had lost all track of time, but despite my protective armor, I was sweating heavily and chafing in all sorts of places. I had aches and pains in a couple dozen places, and every time I looked up, there were more of ‘em coming. But, since I had agreed to the task (once again proving the limit to my wisdom), I had to see it through to the end, and as tiring and unending as the battle proved, I could see the beginnings of the desired reactions from our enemy.They had, after all, never been defeated in combat, across countless eons of existence. On occasion they had been banished by one with faith, or they might fail to tempt or intimidate another one, but never before had they gotten their butts collectively kicked.So, they entered this fight expecting it to be like all the others, waiting for us to lose strength, confidence, and finally hope. Instead, they slowly realized that not only could they not kill us, our instilled-power making evident our invulnerability, and ever so gradually, the demons learned something they had never faced before –They could not win.

I took great enjoyment in seeing that light dawn on each and every horrid face. That funny little twitch in the eyes, when they suddenly realized that not only was I not going down as expected, I would not be going down.From that point, it was simply a matter of how long they wanted to keep it up, knowing that somehow, this time their strength was limited, and mine was not.In a while, I began to see two very welcome emotions on their faces: Fatigue - and fear.Not fear of death, but of defeat in an unthinkable way; losing to a human.

One by one, they dropped their weapons and allowed themselves to be chained. Not that they wanted it, they just finally gave up in exhaustion and anger, some of it at their leader, who was the last to give up, the loudest and most profane throughout the fight.When at last his arms refused to answer his call anymore, and angels from each side chained him down, he roared in futile defiance one last time, and called me all manner of names. I refused to let him know just how worn out I was.

“Hey, do I say things about your mother?” I asked, and the angels led him away for his own judgment.Together, Richard and I now faced the crowd of people the demons had been torturing.As if on cue, they fell on their faces and began to pray to us.Richard rolled his eyes as I called out to the crowd

“Stop that right now! I’m just a man like you!”

“But you are the ones who vanquished the demons!” answered the crowd, and they began to chant.

Richard chuckled.

“And you’re the one who warned me about the possible results of this sort of thing!”

“Ha ha.” I retorted. “C’mon, up with you” I said to the people, as I pulled them up, one at a time.

As I pulled people to their feet, I took a moment to catch my breath and collect my thoughts, as I surveyed the scene before me.The demons were still down, in some cases bound by the remaining angels, and in others a few more aggressive of their victims were exacting various small measures of payback, kicking the demons and yelling various unpleasantries at them.Of the humans, most had fallen to their faces, which was forcing Richard and me to play upsy-daisy. But some were taking their chance to kick and punch at their tormentors, and there were also a number of groups standing around, as if trying to decide their next course. I dealt with the hero-worshippers first.

“Alright” I began, to get their attention. “Take a good look around.

“Whew! Come to think of it, take a deep breath, and smell this place, too.

“Is this where you want to stay? Are you having a great time here, and is this how you always hoped things would work out?”I paused, and was relieved a little bit that no one seemed to want to be here.

“So, how did this happen? It happened, because instead of choosing for yourself, you all let yourselves get led into mistakes and wrong, and you wound up here. Maybe you would have made some mistakes, but c’mon “ – I gestured around the place – “I wouldn’t choose this for my final residence, and I don’t think you would either.”

A man moved to the front. ”Tell us, Master, what would you have us do?” he asked, and as I saw many around him nod, I groaned inside.

“OK, for starters, don’t call me Master.” I said “I have some confidence in things I can do, but I don’t own anybody, and I wouldn’t want to act like I do.”

“I am most sorry for offending you” said the man, and I wanted to scream. Just then, however, another man stood up and confronted him.

“Haven’t you learned anything?” demanded the second man. ”We get sucked into hell by listening to demons disguised as friends and lovers, and now – “ he pointed to me ”you get all weepy, just because another demon disguised like an angel of light kicks out the first group and tries to take over. Well, I’m not buying!” he finished, glaring at me in defiance.

“Bravo!” I said to him, and he looked startled at my smile and cheer.“Yes, I mean it” I assured him and the group. “Look, I don’t blame you for not trusting the first face you see after getting freed, so I’m not getting my feelings hurt because you think I might be just like the guys we just kicked.

“Besides, the main thing is, you need to see and decide some things for yourself, so getting out on your own is just what you need.”

“Oh really?” sneered the man. “Well, what if you want us to go get lost down here? I don’t see you telling us how to find Paradise, or even a decent hotel, do ya? Maybe I’ll just hang around you for awhile, to keep you from leaving us all here to rot!”

The crowd seemed in agreement with him, both the syncophants and the angry ones. Some in the other groups seemed to agree.

“Fine with me” I replied. “By the way, sir, what’s your name?”

“None of your f----ng business” he replied.

“OK, so I’ll just call you ‘Buddy’ for now” I said. “The rest of you, hear me well : I do not have all the answers, and I can’t promise everything will work out the way you want, but if you want to tag along, I’ll at least get you out of Hell, unless that’s where you belong."

Buddy wasn’t satisfied. “Maybe I’ll just make sure you behave. Feel like being my hostage?” he asked, as his arm came around my neck.

A flash of light and a bolt from somewhere hit him just as he touched my collar, and he went down like a sack of rocks.

“OK, while he’s out” I said to Richard, “I’ll go have some words with other people here.”

Richard nodded and the rest of the crowd backed away.I found some of the men beating up on one of the demons. They stopped and looked at me as I approached.

“Hey guys” I said as I approached, “Having fun?”

Two of them shrugged, and the third was still angry.

“He stole so much from us!” he cried, almost screaming.

“I know” I agreed, “but is this making anything better?”

”Well” said the man, ”It feels good, and I haven’t done what I wanted to do, for a long, long time.”

“I know what you mean, I had that problem once myself” I said, hoping I didn’t sound as patronizing as I worried it might. “But while it’s important to fight sometimes, you have to know when it’s time to stop, as well.”

“I guess” admitted the man. “So, what happens now? We get judged for all our bad things and we go get punished forever somewhere?”

“Is that what you want?” I asked. “Maybe something better can be had”

“What kind of angel are you, anyway?” the man asked. “You don’t look like anything I expected, and anyway, I always heard you guys were just supposed to go round up us bad folk for the fiery pit. What do you mean, saying we might have a chance at something better?”

I laughed.

“Sorry, but I’m not an angel” I began. The men gaped at me.“Then what are you?” asked the man.“Maybe, what you can become” I answered. “Come, and we’ll talk on the way.”

And as I turned, the men joined me and we gathered others to join us. Some were reluctant or unwilling, and I assured them that if they waited, the angels would guide them to the proper waystations.

An angry shout from the entry grabbed everyone’s attention.“You had a party and didn’t invite me?” demanded Arf.

Richard chuckled

"I saw that one coming” he remarked.

Chapter Eight: About God, Dogs, and Fighting

2004-11-26T21:01:00.000-08:00

Arf trotted over to us, very angry at me for having a romp without her. For my part, I would just as soon let her take my place. My clothes still chafed, and I wondered how long it would be before I could have a nice cup of tea and an hour with a good book. I suddenly realized I was in deeper trouble, as Arf demanded“Are you even listening to me?!?”, and Richard chuckled as he left me alone to face her wrath.

“Um, sorry” I began, but Arf cut me off with an extended description of how difficult and annoying it was to herd people to meet up with Christ.

“You wouldn’t believe the excuses they came up with, to put off the meeting” she said, ”like it was going to be a thing they’d want to avoid. I mean – argh!”

I started to laugh, but a look at Arf wiped the smile off my face.

“I mean, what, you couldn’t save even one or two for me?” she finally asked, and at that I smiled.

“There’s plenty more ahead, as I’m sure you know” I told her.

“There better be” said Arf, and she went over to chat with a couple of the remaining angels. I looked around, and saw Richard was speaking with some of the men, and so I went over and found John Andrew, who seemed a bit overwhelmed by the scene.

“Easy, son” I said, “See why I told you to hang back?”

“Uhhhhhhhh, yes” answered John. ”But why didn’t you slay them?”

I held up a finger.“One, I am not a knight on a quest.” I said.

I held up a second finger.“Two, Everybody is beyond life and death as we used to know it. The only death remaining is the Second Death they wrote about in Revelation, and that’s not my department.“Besides, don’t you know anything about Chivalry?

“Never kill when you can maim,

“Never maim when you can injure,

“Never injure when you can fight to disarm,

“Never fight to disarm when you can persuade.

“And if you’re fighting demons, never play by their rules, okay?”

“Okay” John shrugged.

“Okay, then, let’s go talk to some of the other folks around here. There’s a lot of cleaning up to do here, still, and we have along way to go.” I said.

John cocked his head in the direction of Arf.

“I see your familiar has returned” he said.

I groaned.

“I can see we have a long way to go ourselves” I answered.

John followed me along with a growing crowd, as we walked back to where “Buddy” was beginning to stir again. I knelt down to him, and as I offered my hand, I asked “How do you feel?”

He tried to sucker punch me.

I say tried, because just as his fist touched my face, a crackle of light snapped, and “Buddy” fell back down again. A few of the men around him laughed at this, and I shook my head as I stood back up.

“Hey, John, look around and see if you can find anything around here we can use to carry this guy, OK?”

John nodded and one of the men who had been laughing spoke up.

“I thought Steve was dumb, but I was wrong.”

Then he grinned.“Sorry to say, I think now that Steve must be about as dumb as a bag of bricks, I mean real stupid.”

“I don’t think so” I answered. “I think maybe he’s just real upset about his situation, and so far this response is the only one he keeps coming back to.”

“Maybe” the man allowed. ”I admit, I’m curious about who you are, and what you’re up to.”

“Just trying to help out” I answered, and the man shrugged.

“Maybe, maybe not – One thing I agree with Steve on, is we don’t know s—t about you, and just because things’re bad, doesn’t mean you couldn’t plan on making them, worse.

“I mean, we’ve learned a lot about liars and trickery down here.”

I sighed.“Well, you are going to have to make up your own minds, about what you want to believe and what you’ll do about it. I just got you unlocked from those demons.”

“Well, Okay, thanks for that.” said the man. ”I just wondered what the next shoe is gonna look like, and when it’ll drop.”

“Not on us, I hope” I said. “By the way, I’m Dan. What’s your name?”

The man made a face, and said ”uh, it’s Lou Abbott”

I wondered why he made a face, but another man cut in -“We just call him ‘Who’s On First’” and he laughed, and it clicked.

Ah. Bud Abbott and Lou Costello. Abbott & Costello in one man.

“There’s worse names” I assured Lou, as I shook his hand. “Absolutely” chimed in Arf. ”Someone could’ve named you for a cartoon dog.”

As we dragged Steve over to a waiting stretcher, Lou sniffed the air.

“That’s weird, now it smells like Turkey.”

“It’s the season” I explained, “And anyway, it’s sure an improvement.”

The crowd voiced agreement, although I got angry looks from two women in PETA shirts.

The crowd had reformed, and looked at me expectantly.I grabbed Arf, and shoved her to the front. “Ohhhhhh no” I said. “This time, you do the speech thing”

“Oh yeeeeeah” said Arf, and she stood on hind legs and cleared her throat.

John stared at me as if I was crazy. Given the situation, I really wondered why no one else was.

Arf was explaining the intricacies of Free Will to the crowd, as I took Richard and John off to the side, along with a few tagalongs who were interested. I asked a couple of them to look after Steve, and let me know when he came around again.

“The good news is, the choice you have to make is really pretty simple” I began. “The bad news is, it can be really hard making that choice, and there’s a lot of confusion out there. As you know from your own experience, that can really hurt you.”

A man stood to ask a question. “I’m worried” he said. “I understand that you aren’t God, but what is going to happen now? Do we face some kind of trial, or is it all decided, and what can anybody here do to change things?”

“Well, first I have to say that I don’t know everything, so sometimes I may have to just say I don’t know” I answered. “But never give up hope. The same God who made you has not forgotten you-“

I heard a sneering laugh, and before they told me, I knew Steve had rejoined us.

“Suuuuuuure, God’s a swell guy!” barked Steve, ” Just look how He’s set us up down here!”

“Steve” I said, “God didn’t do this to you. You did this to you.”

Steve looked angry, but flinched as he apparently thought ahead to the likely result of another charge.
“Like hell” said Steve. ”He’s God, which means He knew everything that would happen, and He didn’t do diddly to stop it!

”What’s more, He didn’t have to make Hell, so why did He? He didn’t have to make demons, so why did He?”

I left Steve go on for awhile, and I watched the crowd, some of them rolling their eyes, but a lot more nodding in agreement. I let Steve roll off all the things I had always heard from people angry at God. When Steve finally finished, and Arf continued her sermon (something involving Snoopy, Lassie, and Rin Tin Tin as symbols for the Trinity – I made a note to ask her to tell me that one), I looked around at the crowd, who were waiting for my response.

“I see that you all expect me to have answers for Steve” I said. “That’s funny, because Steve was going on against God. Nobody expects Steve to have the answers, because Steve is just a man, but so am I. What would you say, if I told you I don’t have the answers for everything?”

The crowd said nothing.

“Actually, not so long ago, I said that sometimes I would have to say ‘I don’t know’. But maybe I can help guess a little.

“You there – “ I pointed to a woman – “when you work for something, when you get it, how would you like to hear that nothing you did really counted towards getting what you earned, that it would have happened, no matter what?”

“I’d be angry” said the woman, ”I want credit for what I do.”

“True” I agreed, “Me too. And what if you found out that no matter what you did, you’d get just the same as everyone else?”

The woman made a face. ”That’s not right.”

I clapped my hands together. “Exactly” I said. “You do something because it matters, right?

“Whether it’s work to get the pay you earn, or it’s extra effort to do a really good job for your family or your reputation, you expect to get what you deserve, right?”

People began to fidget, as they realized where this was going.

“That’s Justice” I continued. “You do what you choose, and you get the results of it.”

“OK” said Lou, ”but what about when I get bad I don’t deserve?”

“On the other hand,” I countered, “what about when you do bad but don’t get caught? What about when you get something good you don’t deserve, or when you get good you know you should use to help, but instead you keep it all for yourself?”

Lou looked away, but I pressed the point.

“Humans got this world, and everything that happens here comes from what a human decided to do. Yeah, God steps in with miracles sometimes, but mostly, everything which happens comes from your decision or another human’s.

“What I am trying to do here” I said, “is to help you see how you can get out of that mess.”

“Maybe” allowed Steve, ”But you have along way to go, if you are going to convince me that you’re not just out to cheat us like everybody else.”

I shrugged. “Let’s find out” I said.We got up as a group and made our way back to the others, who were singing what sounded like “KumBayAh” in Tagalog.

Steve made a face. ”I hate that song” he said.

“The words or the music?” I asked.

“Actually, the way it goes on and on and on” he said, and I laughed.

“I hear you. Hey, that’s something we agree on!” I said.

“Not much” said Steve.

“Yeah, but it still counts” I replied.

Arf was leading off another party, but stopped when she saw me. “Wait a minute” she said. ”The last time I took a crowd to see the Boss, you had a little party without me.”

Arf grabbed Richard with her teeth. “Here, you play tour guide for this bunch” she ordered. ” I’m tagging along with Captain Action, here.”

Richard nodded.“OK, guys, I’ll be back later”Arf looked at me closely.“There will be more fighting, right?” she asked.

I sighed. “Arf, you know where we are.

“Yes, there will be more fighting. Let me guess, you’re hoping we run into some Nephilim, aren’t you?” I asked.

Arf smiled sweetly.“That could be very entertaining” she allowed. Steve and Lou looked at each other, and John looked at Richard as if he wanted to leave with him, but when I looked at him directly, he smiled uneasily and said ”OK, good to go.”

About two dozen of us moved back into the dark passageway, deeper into the maw of Hell.

As we stepped into the passageway, I waved at John and he jogged up. Steve and Lou joined him, determined not to miss anything.

"How ya doing, John?” I asked.

“Well enough” replied John, ”though I still don’t comprehend your purpose with your animal” he said, pointing towards Arf, who led our way, senses keen and clearly eager for battle.

“I have yet to meet a godly man, who uses such a familiar”

“There aren’t any godly men” retorted Steve, and Lou looked over at me as if he expected me to get angry. I just shrugged.

“Depends on what you expect” I said to John. “I don’t measure up to everyone’s standards and expectations, but I do my best.

“But Arf is a good servant of the Lord.”

“Unless it’s a Hell Hound” countered Steve, rather snidely.

“But ‘All Dogs Go To Heaven’” said someone in the back, to which there was general chuckling.

“What about cats?” asked someone else in the dark.

“Don’t ask!” returned the first, and our mood lightened, even as the visibility became even worse.

As we walked, the ground beneath us began to crunch, like tiny bits of gravel.

“Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it’s off through Hell we go” crooned Steve, and we all stopped to look at him, or at the shadowy figure we assumed to be Steve.

“What?” asked Steve after a few moments.

I just shook my head, turned around again, and started ahead. Behind me I heard John warn, ”We could get into trouble.”

We all stopped again.

“We’re already in Hell” observed Lou. “How do you figure things to get worse?”

“I don’t know” said John,”but it’s not smart taking any chances.”

I didn’t hear any answer from Lou, so we started again down the crunchy trail. It was quiet for a long time, and in that quiet, I thought I heard a small sound, like a child wailing in the far distance. I stopped, and everyone seemed to stop as I did, listening for the faint noise.

After a few moments, we all realized the faint noise was rising from the ground, and people started looking at the bottoms of their feet, as if to see if they had stepped on someone. I did, myself.I had a thought, concentrated, and lifted us into the air about a half-foot, bearing our weight from the roof, just in case, and I inverted myself to face the ground, trying not to think how ridiculous I must look. I illuminated the ground, and off to my right, perceived a face and floated towards it.

The face was small, but no more than a chihuahua’s, and otherwise human and a normal face for a woman of middling years. She pursed her lips as I approached, and seemed to be offended by my presence. She spoke, but I could not hear her.

“I’m sorry, could you say that again?” I asked. The face in the floor became angry but no louder, and I perceived a distant hand rise from the floor over by the wall, and beckon me closer to the face. I floated closer.

“Just who do you think you are? demanded the face. ”This is my way, not yours. I know your kind, and you are not fit to be here!” she cried.

“Ummmm, you do realize this is hell…” I started, but the woman cut me off, but in a voice so soft it was barely a breeze. Just as well I missed the first few words, as I caught several sharp invectives as she continued.

“Who are you to tell me my place?” she snapped. ”I know your type, all sweet and light and everybody’s favorite” - at which I heard Steve snort from behind me - ”but you don’t fool me, you charlatan!”

“Maybe we started badly” I offered. “My name is Daniel, and” – I stopped as I heard a distant hissing and realized the woman had started again. I let her vent for a while, saying things which expressed her anger, but otherwise served no useless purpose. When she finished, I floated back in and tried again:“Look, I’m sorry we stepped on you, but we just weren’t expecting people to be, uh, spread out on the floor like this-“

“So, now you get to decide how we can sit or stand?” demanded the whispering woman, and I wanted to give up, but somehow felt compelled to try just once more.“Look, we’re on our way out, eventually, and if you’d like to come along-“

“Follow you? I don’t think so, thank you very much” sneered the woman, and she turned her back on me, the face rolling into the wall before disappearing under her formless body.We shrugged and floated on, and when the ground seemed more normal, we returned to walking.

”Heeeeeeeeey, I wanna slo-fly some more” protested Arf.

“So do it.” I said. “I’m not stopping you”.

“Oh, yeah” laughed Arf, and she lept into the air, and began a slow float ahead of us, like those dog food commercials where you get the “Superdog” impressions as the mutt slowly floats by, chasing a ball, stick, Frisbee, or whatever.

Behind me, I heard a thump. Steve was in a heap on the floor, and as Lou helped him up, he asked me ”Heeeey, how come the dog can do it and you can, but we can’t?”

I found a Bible in my backpack and tossed it to him.“It’s all in there. Look up the part about faith and mustard seeds” I said and grinned.Steve muttered something under his voice as he rubbed his backside, and we continued.

I stopped after a distance, and leaned with my back against the wall, trying to decide what to do next. Arf trotted over to me, started to say something witty, but stopped when she saw my face.

“Ahhhhhh, forget about her” advised the dog, ”You tried, she cursed you, you move on. No big deal!”

“Sorry, Arf, but no can do” I answered. “You know how this level works: everyone here is controlled by someone else. So, for better or worse, we have to free her from her captivity, so she can freely choose, for better or worse.”

“Judging by the conversation, that one won’t end up happy” commented Arf, ”And anyway, you still need to keep that promise to find me a good fight.”

“Don’t worry, there’s a lot of fighting to be had, still” I promised her, and John joined us.

“There is someone controlling her?” he asked. ”I saw no one”

“She was hiding it, whatever it is” I replied. “Remember, how she turned away at the end? I think she was asking what to do next, and I wanted to think before we got into that.”

“Why?” asked Steve, ”You get scared by a face on the floor?”“No, Steve” I answered, “but if I fight it on its terms, the woman would get hurt while the thing hides behind her. I need to find a better plan”

“What about tickling her?” suggested Lou.We stopped, turned, and looked at him.“I mean it” insisted Lou, “You want the lady to move, without getting hurt, and you want surprise.

“This is surprise”

“Great idea, thanks Lou.” I said. “Arf, you come with me, everyone else, hang back and we’ll be with you in a little while.

Arf tossed Steve a pack of cards. “Have fun” she said, and we floated back towards the floor lady,

”I know I will.”

“You realize” I said to Arf as we floated, “we still have no idea what we’re up against.”

Arf chuckled.

“As if that ever stopped me before” she quipped.

We found the woman pretty much where we had left her, and she was no happier than before to see me. I heard an impatient whisper as Arf asked her, ”Ticklish?”I reached quickly to that part of the floor which seemed to be her abdomen, and tickled.

I was rewarded with a soft but sharp gasp, and the woman abruptly turned to her side, raising her legs from the floor about 30 feet away. I had the surreal sense of wrestling Plasticman.

Suddenly, the woman turned to her side, and beneath her gray form I had a glimpse of something black, big, and alive, which promptly slammed me against the ceiling to the passage.Caught unaware, I watched the pretty colors wheel around as I heard Arf yell "YeeeeeHa!”, and everything went dark.That is, darker than usual.

The place was suddenly full of noise and fury, and I became intensely aware that my spleen had an angry message for my liver and colon.Bits of rock ground into my face, as I tried to sort out what was happening. It seemed like a bunch of people had arrived, and I had mixed feelings – it was nice to think the group might be trying to rescue me, but I worried about what could happen if things didn’t get handled quickly.I thought for a little but, and the taste of cave wall decided me. Twisting just a bit to get my mouth free of the rock, I took a deep breath – and spoke a “Word”.

I was ready for the fall and floated down to the floor as the reverberations echoed down the hall in a blast of light and sound, a shock wave of holiness rolling off into the distance. I vaguely wondered how long those things would roll, but shook off the thought and returned to the situation.The place looked like the 101 Dalmations people had met up with Enter the Dragon and Dantes Inferno. A large pack of hounds was tearing into the monster, which looked like a land-based octopus, but with black armadillo scales. Arf seemed to be having a wonderful time, and I wondered where she had called up this group. Off in the distance, my group was obediently staying put, watching with some interest. Steve looked to be taking notes.The woman was lying on the floor, apparently stunned and on her side, but her thin loose condition left her lying on about 60 square feet of ground. Whatever the black octo-dillo thing was, it was not nearly so stunned. Though it had dropped me when I spoke the holy word, it was back in action, already reaching for me again. Ready this time, I whipped out a short blade from the backpack (which seemed to impress John and Lou, Steve still taking notes) and snikked! off an appendage, which lay writhing on the ground. Two of the dogs immediately set upon it, and I couldn’t tell if they planned to subdue it or eat it.The beast began to mutter something. I leaned forward to catch what it was saying, against my better judgment, and what I heard sickened me. Literally. Whatever it was saying had the quality of making me physically ill, and I realized it was a kind of attack. I also recognized it was some corrupted form of Latin, and I realized that it was my good fortune there – if I had been able to understand what it was saying, I realized it would have likely been much stronger, and a much more effective attack. As it was, I was not much worse off than if I had been back at college, trying to digest my dorm’s cooking.Arf was also saying something, though I could easily tell she was simply taunting the octo-dillo.

The dogs were making a real mess of the ‘dillo, so I put up my blade, reached down and grabbed an arm of Olive Oyl (as I’d starting thinking of her), and dragged her away from the fray.

“Unhand me, you heathen” she murmured.

“Save the sweet talk for later, sunshine” I replied, and on a whim, I began to roll her up like a rug. I heard muttered complaints, but it was the easiest way I could figure to move her. The weight wasn’t the problem, but the size had its own issues.I carried 'Olive' over to the group, and Steve couldn’t resist quipping “Accessorizing? Maybe a nice drapery?”

I laughed, thumbed back at the fight still going on between the monster and the dogs, and said

“Nah. But there’s a place for you, if you want in on that action”

Steve shook his head and Lou chuckled..

We waited for a while, and watched the fight. Steve looked over at me and asked, ”You know what I hate about this place?”

I cocked my head and looked at him. “Everything?” I asked.

“Well, okay, yeah” said Steve, ”but I mean, right about now, it might be cool to just talk about stuff, y’know? But here, everything is either too important to chat about, or you can’t find anything to discuss.”

“Really?” I asked.

“Oh, yeah” affirmed Steve. ”I met this guy, for example, looked okay, so we got to talking.“You know what he talked about? Pompeii. Freaking Pompeii all the time, everything he said was about the people in Pompeii, the art in Pompeii, the food in Pompeii.

“I tried to be nice at first, I mean anything to take my mind off the situation, but I mean, c’mon. Bad enough he’d never been to Dallas, New York, Boston, but this guy had never heard of those places. You know how hard it is to shoot the breeze, when the guy doesn’t even know what ‘shoot the breeze’ means?!?”

“So, talk to someone else” I suggested. Steve rolled his eyes.“Oooooohhhhhhhhh, suuure, there’s an idea” he moaned. “At least Mr. Pompeii had learned English.“You know what most people speak down here?

“Latin! That, or Chinese, I think. Anyway, it just drives me up the wall to try to talk it up with a guy, only to find out he’s speaking a language deader than I am!”

Lou snickered at that, and Steve tried to hit him. I stepped in between them, and Steve backed off, remembering what had happened before.

“Soooo” I started, trying to get back to the discussion, “Why not learn Latin?”

“Oh yeah, why not?” complained Steve. ”Why not get the worst of both Hell and Catholic School?” he complained.

“At least you’re admitting Hell exists” I said.

“Yeah, whatever.” said Steve. “Say, you wanna bet on which dog does the most hurt?”

“No” I replied. “I don’t like to gamble. And besides, I know which dog is the craziest in that pack”

“I heeeeeeeeard that” responded a voice from somewhere in the fray.

“Whatever” repeated Steve. He thought for a moment, then looked at me with a strange expression.

“Another thing” he said. “That’s a nice trick, being able to talk explosions.”I shrugged. Steve pressed on:“But why don’t you do that all the time?”

“Because, Steve” I said, “I’m here to help, not to hurt, if I can avoid it. It’s about not doing anything you don’t have to do.”

“And the dogfight?” asked Steve.

“Somehow, it’s necessary, or it wouldn’t be happening.” I replied. Behind me, “Olive” muttered something, but for now I chose to let it go.

All good things must end, they say, and the dogs had apparently decided this applied to their torment of the monster, as well. They backed off from it, and I approached it. Remembering my introduction to it, I drew my sword again and demanded its surrender.For about half a minute I waited, listening to it consider its options as a sound like a couple forks in a garbage disposal emerged from its jaws.Finally, it decided to comply, with something very much like “I’ll be good” emerging from somewhere within, and Arf pulled up a large cage on wheels, and the beastie entered it.

As Arf was closing the gate to the cage, Lou looked around, and started to ask ”Hey, where did the cage come from-“ and abruptly stopped, as Arf drew a sack over the cage, which collapsed and appeared to be empty after the cage was in.

“Nice trick” nodded Steve. Arf just grinned, and dropped the sack into her back pack, which I then put on her back. As we moved on, Steve came up to me.

“OK, now you’re getting just too strange. What was that all about, anyway?” he demanded.“First you tell us you’re setting us free, then you start taking prisoners.”

“Oh, that” I said. Steve groaned.

“Yes, ‘that’.” said Steve. “C’mon, answer.”

“Look, Steve” I said to him. “That monster is a demon, a fallen angel out to hurt people any way it can.”

“OK, all right” said Steve, ”But what about the woman? She really didn’t want you to do anything for her, but instead you grabbed her as a prisoner, and you’re holding here against her will.”

“Steve, it’s not as if she was making the decisions” I reminded him. “Just 10 minutes ago, she took her orders from the demon, and if I’d just left here there, before she was in any shape to move on her own, she’d have been stepped or chewed on by a whole lot of people.

“When she can walk on her own, if she still wants to go away, that’s fine. But it will be her idea and decision not somebody else’s.”

“Maybe” said Steve. He turned to Lou. “Hey Lou! You believe this guy, yet?”

“Some” said Lou.“What about God and Heaven and all that?” asked Steve.

“No” replied Lou. “He’s admitted he’s not God, so I haven’t seen any gods so far, no Heavens, just a guy, his dog, and some friends.

“Hey, that reminds me. You got any beer?” asked Lou.“No, no beer” I answered.

“Well” said Lou, ”in that case I do believe we’re in hell.”

Steve shook his head and Lou chuckled..

Chapter Nine: Mythology in Transit

2004-11-26T01:44:00.000-08:00

As we walked along, we enjoyed the quiet for awhile. It was actually getting rather nice. No screaming, no monsters hiding under flat people banging me against the ceiling, a cool breeze wafting from somewhere in the distance.. The woman cleared her throat, and I realized she was getting her voice back, which was good for her returning strength. But she was also really mad at me, which was no fun.

“You, sir, treated me most shabbily!” said the woman in a quiet voice, but much louder than the murmurs she had managed earlier. “Had I the power” she continued, ”I would gladly have done to you what you did to my poor Doctra.”

“Doctra?” I asked.

The woman pouted.“I’m sure you know who I mean. That poor innocent creature you set the dogs on” she said.

“You mean that armored beastie who bashed me about the roof and walls?” I asked. The woman smiled faintly.

“I did tell you, you had no business being here” she said, and I heard Steve chuckle. ”But really, you scared the poor thing”

“Uhhh-huh.” Was all I could say to that.

“Listen, since you’re getting a little stronger” I said, seeing her slowly raise one arm which seemed to gradually be shrinking back to a normal length and gaining definition, “My name is Daniel. And you are?”

“Miss Precept, to you” said the woman. “And you can forget about getting chummy with me, I shall be leaving as soon as I catch my breath.

“And I’ll thank you to give me back my Doctra!”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Miss Precept” I said. “That Doctra is a demon, and it’s got to go up topside to face Judgment.

Miss Precept looked shocked, and began to cry.

“You’re not going to hurt the poor thing!” she shouted, in a voice much louder than before. She was almost, but not quite, able to put weight on her legs. Steve and I caught her as she fell down. She slapped gently at us as we set her back on her seat.

“It’s already been through too much as it is, with those vicious hounds of yours!” she said, peering angrily at Arf, who didn’t make things better by laughing.

“Hey, he started it, we finished it” retorted Arf.

“Look, Miss Precept” I said, “We have to take the demon back, that’s no choice. But you can leave or come along as you choose.”

“If you’re taking my Doctra with you” snapped Miss Precept, almost fully human in shape and size now, ”Then I am certainly coming along to keep you from hurting any more on the way.”

Miss Precept looked around at our group.

“Hmf.” she said, ”From the look of you all, I’d be very interested to see how you handle your judgments.”

Arf and I looked at each other, and Arf winked. Lou looked a little nervous. Steve looked like he wonder how far it was to the nearest bar.

Off in the distance, we heard a muffled thud, and the sound of something large and angry. Arf’s ears perked up.

“Oooookay, more playtime!” she cried. ”C’mon, let’s get going!”I found weapons in my backpack for everyone, and we moved ahead.

I gained some confidence as we moved ahead. While whatever was waiting for us was definitely large and unhappy, the sheer number of bumps and thuds indicated it was none too agile. Then again, it might just trip and fall on me. Vaguely, I wondered why Arf never seemed to have these worries...

“Hey, holy guy” called out Steve from behind me. “Explain something to me, since you’re all wise and stuff.”

“I’ll try” I said, “and although I’m sure you already know, I’m not holy, just doing the job.”

“Yeah, sure” returned Steve. “Anyway, I was thinking:

“You’re telling us how you’re here to help us, and how God is all love and happiness and stuff.

“So, why are you carrying a bagful of weapons? Is that to ‘persuade’ anyone who won’t listen to you?”

I sighed

Look, Steve” I said, “it’s not as if I use these on any people. And by the way, I’d suggest you don’t try to hit any people with it”

“Oh, really” said Steve, moving over towards John, and waving his mace a bit. “What if I sort of, you know, ‘missed accidentally’ -” and he swung the mace with full force towards John-and the mace, of itself, swung back onto Steve’s hand. Stevce howled with pain and dropped the mace.

“That’s why” I explained. “Now, pick up the mace with the other hand and don’t fool around like that.

“These weapons are made to be used on evil, and that’s all they’ll hurt.”

Steve grimaced.

“Ohhhh, now I’m evil?” he asked.

“Well, it hit your arm” I said. “Maybe it’s you, but mostly it’s just what was in your heart when you tried to hit John.

“Anyway, it’s a good thing, I think.” I said, “You don’t have to worry about hitting one of your buddies, even if you don’t like them.”

“By the way” said Lou, “Where are you getting all these weapons, anyway?”

“Check the writing” I suggested.“Writing?” asked Lou and Steve and John, as they looked more closely at their weapons.

“Hey, there’s an inscription on my sword” said John, “Then David ran and stood over the Philistine, and took his sword” he read.

“I will make them strong in the Lord, and they shall glory in his name” read Lou.

“Ahhhh, swell” muttered Steve, “to fight monsters, we have to use weapons with primitive superstitious sayings etched on them.”

“Well, Steve” I said, “if you don’t like the mace, you don’t have to use it. How do you feel about wrestling the forces of evil?”

Steve just shot me a mean look, but he kept the mace in his grip.

Stomping along as we approached the noisy darkness ahead, I decided Steve’s question had some merit, and caught with Arf to ask about it. She cocked her head an me and smiled.

“You’re not worried are you, Dan?” chuckled Arf.

“No that’s not it” I said, “but I was just thinking, that we seem to be getting into fighting pretty easily right now, and I wondered if I was being hasty.”

“Naaaah” assured Arf, ”In the first place, you and I have both been getting the same vibes, and you know we’re going to have to tackle some big baddies in this place and time. But I agree, that for all the fun, we need to be sure we don’t forget what we are about.

“Of course, “ continued Arf, ”that certainly doesn’t mean we can’t have fun doing the Lord’s will.”

“Fun, huh?” I countered. “I guess your back isn’t as sore as mine is right now” I complained.

“Ahh, you primates are always complaining about something.” said Arf. “If you get too tired, just let me know, okay?”

The fresh breeze turned into a steady wind, and I became aware that the cave roof had risen to somewhere far above. The sounds of our passage seemed much more open, as well. Remembering Scripture, I drew my sword and commanded it to light the way –And in the distance we saw a steep set of cliffs, of some pale rock, ending far above in a smooth curve of white stone. There was a funny smell, too, which I couldn’t place at first.

“Hooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, I shoulda brought the guys” murmured Arf. I turned to ask Arf what that was about, but I had a thought, and looked again at the cliffs.As five of them suddenly rose into the black sky, moving towards and above us, I suddenly realized that we were staring not at cliffs, but at the stupendous feet of a nephilim.

Who was in the process of trying to stomp on us.

Behind me, I heard a small voice suggest ”… run away?” , which would have been excellent advice, if there had been time.

Short answer is, there wasn’t time. Things got even darker, then things got heavy.After some time, it occurred to me that this might be karmic retribution for all the bugs I’d stepped on in my life. Assuming I had the chance, I meant to ask the Boss about that.I heard muffled noises, then nothing. Nothing but a bad smell and a worse feeling.I heard my sword ringing.At first, I figured it was my imagination, but I managed to reach down and pull it out, and sure enough, it was ringing and flashing, a pretty bell tone and a white/golden blink of light. I pulled the handle up closer and inspected it, trying to figure out how to answer it.

“Hello Daniel” said my Lord Jesus Christ (using my new name).

”What are you doing, lying on the ground under the giant’s toe like that?”

“I, uhhhh, wasn’t aware I had a choice” I replied.

”You always have a choice, Daniel” replied the Lord. “So, if you’d like to get on with the job, there’s a lot still to go.”

“Okay” I answered. “Ummm, since I can choose, could you clue me in on what my choices are?”

“I could just tell you” answered Jesus, ”but this is better used as a learning experience.

“I’m sure you’ll remember something useful.”

And with that, the call was over, as the sword stopped shining and went silent. I poked myself a couple times, trying to get it back into the sheath. For the record, I was not having fun.

I tried using a Word. The foot lifted a couple feet, then crashed back down on me. I presumed, from the pain, that this was not the intended lesson. So I thought some more.I laid there for a little while, despite my Lord’s remonstrations to get moving, and after awhile, I remembered that in Heaven, Jesus had been able to change His size at will. Maybe He meant I could do it, as well.“In the name of Jesus Christ” I intoned, “make me 500 feet high” I said, hoping that size would be suitable for the task.

Nothing.

I pondered the matter for a little longer, then remembered that Jesus had not said anything, He just did it. Then again, I didn’t figure Immanuel needed to ask His own permission.

I carefully concentrated, and rethought the size. Maybe a thousand feet would be best for dealing with a giant? If the toenail was 50 feet up, then .. I did some math and decided I needed to be about 5000 feet high. Anything was possible, so I aimed high, took a deep breath of the fetid air –I felt the giant, now much smaller than me, fall off and tumble to the ground. I was about to cheer, then felt my head smack hard against the cavern ceiling, and back down I went.

As the world spun around, I heard laughing.

I came to, again aware of an unpleasant smell. I found it impossible to move, and I seemed to be bent into an awkward position, facing down, with my arms and legs braced by ropes. A quick glance around confirmed that I had been separated from my backpack and weapons. I realized that the smell was coming from above, as someone was using me for a chair.

The guy sitting on me realized I was awake.

“Heeeeeey, Elvis is awake!” he announced. “C’mon, King, sing us a pretty song.”

“I’m not Elvis” I said, and the man laughed bawdily.

“Well, with that outfit, I guess you could be Evel Knievel, but he’d know how to miss bashing his own head on the roof.

“Anyway, Mister change-o-bang-o” continued the man, ”What do you think you’re doing, barging in like that? This is my place, and since you can change sizes, it’s not as if you can’t make do somewhere else.”

That was good news. In a flash, I not only realized what had happened before, so that I remembered now that I was facing, well, bound underneath one of the nephilim, but I also realized that the rest of my party had escaped his notice. I briefly wondered what had happened to Arf, who would never choose to miss a fight. A few moments’ thought did not illuminate. I let it go for now, hoping I would think of something when it was opportune.

“So, I’m Daniel” I offered, “Who are you?”

“Boneshear” announced the giant, “but don’t get too cozy. As far as I’m concerned, you’re just waiting for me to make up my mind about what to do with you.”

I heard heavy steps approach, and Boneshear stood. Either I had shrunk a bit, or the giant had grown since I first saw him. Things were just getting better and better, I griped to myself.Four more of the nephilim entered the opening. Boneshear picked me up with one hand, molded me as if into a ball, and tossed me at one of the arrivals.

“Hey, Slowdeath, catch!” he shouted, and the giant caught me easily with one hand, before throwing me down hard to the ground. The floor was still gravelly, and despite my relative size, it ground into my face and arms.The giants laughed together, and I had the unpleasant worry that I was about to become equipment in a game I would find distinctly painful and difficult to endure.Another one of the giants picked me up, and I tested the ropes. They remained tight and strong. I had the unpleasant feeling that if I tried to increase my size, they would bite into me, rather than fall away. As the second giant caromed me off the wall to another one, I remembered one of the Words, and spoke it.

Or tried to.

Nothing came out. I tried to mouth the words, as my breath failed, and Boneshear guffawed.

“Now then, you don’t think we’d allow that sort of language around here, do you?”

The giants all laughed together, as I came close to despair.

Time passed, though I can’t say how long. I vaguely wondered how my companions were getting along, hoping that they had not met some disaster because I couldn’t protect them. Just as I wondered what had happened to Arf, one of the giants answered, as if on cue.

“What are we going to do about that [------- ] dog?” he asked, swearing.

Boneshear laughed harshly. “Fancy that! First you get nipped by a pup almost smaller than the fleas in your hair, and now you’re worried it might come back!”

The giants roared in laughter at that, and the first one seemed ready to strike of his mates in anger. But the others had clearly taunted each other many times, and the offended brute couldn’t get close enough to any one, without two others blocking his way. Finally, one of the giants was able to get behind the first, and cuffed him sharply on the back of his head, so that he fell senseless to the floor.

“Oooo, that was a mistake on ‘im” crowed Slowdeath. ”Alrighty then, strip him!”

And the giants stripped the unconscious brute naked, and beating him a few more times for their amusement, they walked off towards a table and began to eat what looked like rotten vegetables and muddy stones.

“Speaking of morons,” began one of their number, ”Where in hell is Rector?”

“Speaking of idiots” returned another, ”who in hell cares?”The group grumbled agreement, and I wondered what that was about. It almost seemed from their tone, that these were afraid of this rector, and I wondered what sort of monster scared this sort of thug. Again, I seemed to receive my answer quickly.Quick steps, heavy but crisp-sounding, like someone determined and confident, approached. What was truly interesting was the reaction of the giants, who leapt to their feet as if caught in some mischief, as indeed they tried to hide the fallen giant’s clothing amongst themselves.

I rather expected some huge monster, but instead entered a relatively small giant, perhaps a head less in height from his colleagues. But this one seemed to carry authority with him, and he was definitely precise in his actions and quick in his wit. He quickly surveyed the room, and his glare turned hotly on his crew.

He pointed to the naked giant.“Dress him!” he ordered.

One of the giants took up the challenge. ”Make me” he countered.

Rector produced a sling, and faster than I could see him do it, put three stones into the face of the other giant, who fell to his knees sobbing surrender. The other giants quickly grabbed the clothes from their hiding places, and rushed to dress the naked giant, ignoring the one who had defied Rector.

Spying me, Rector came over and knelt, peering closely at me, considering something.“Just when you think it can’t get any worse…” he muttered almost too low to hear.

Rector turned to his fellow giants. ”His weapons and pack! NOW!”

Rector muttered what seemed to be an incantation, and the bonds fell away. As I collapsed onto the ground, and my outraged muscles and nerves screamed their protest, Rector caught me, and set me onto my back.“Just rest easy, until your strength returns” he advised. ”I am so very sorry for this. These have no idea what they have done.

“Or do you really think” he asked the others, his voice rising, ”that it is wise to try to defy one of the Elect?”

“But Rector,” Boneshear protested, ”what would one of the elect be doing here in hell?”

Rector smiled grimly. ”I don’t know, but I hope we can find out.”

As my feeling returned, along with those pins and pains the body gives to dissuade repeating what one did to lose the balance, Rector introduced himself and his brothers.

“Boneshear and Slowdeath you have met,” he began, ”and the rest are Moaner, Mauler and Ebola.”

“Nice names” I responded. “Rock band?”

“Naw, mostly strangling and stabbing” answered Mauler.

“Not the names I would have chosen…” said Rector, ”but to each his own, I suppose.

“Though I would think you would give more thought about how you will account before the King” he said, raising his voice and looking pointedly towards Boneshear.

Boneshear waved him off.

“As if anybody cares what happens to us down here” he replied. ”It’s everyone on his own down here, and only a fool with a pretty name thinks different!”

“So, are you guys Nephilim?” I asked. The giants laughed.“Not anymore” said Mauler after a moment.

”Sure, we’re still huge and mean, but we don’t have nearly the power we used to, no magic at all really, and what hope we had, we threw away long ago."

I shook my head. “Maybe, maybe not” I said, and everyone’s head turned my way.

“But first” I asked, “where’s my dog?”

Boneshear asked, ”That little demon is yours?”

“Well, she’s one of the good guys, but yes, she’s my companion on this trip.” I answered. “Any idea where she is?”

“Not a clue” replied Moaner, ”and that’s fine with me. Good job she’s not as big as we are, or I’d be in it for sure.”

I chuckled. “Yeah, that sounds like Arf.” I said.

“OK, we’ll look for your dog””but were you just now suggesting you might know a way we can get out of hell?”

The other giants groaned together.

“Not again” Complained Mauler. ” I know this song – ‘C’mon guys, let’s pray to God and tell Him we’re sorry, and see if He might yet take pity on us’ “Not buying. Not then, not now.”

Rector glared back. “After all these years, Mauler, one would think you’d have learned something.” said Rector.“Defying God has really worked well, huh? Here we are, in exactly the place we have earned for our arrogance.

“What are you afraid of losing? What is there left to lose?”

Rector approached me and extended his hand. “For what it’s worth,” he said, ”I am very sorry for everything wrong I’ve done, and whatever it costs me, I am now ready to go face my Lord and His judgment.”

“Welcome, Rector” I said to him. “I have friends around here somewhere. Let’s go find them.”As we walked off, the rest stood back in silence for a time, and it seemed they were content to remain.

But after a bit, I heard from behind us, and turning, we saw the other five come running. As Rector started to smile, Boneshear glared him down.“All right, all right, don’t go getting a big head.” he said. ”Maybe we just got bored and want to try something else.

“So, I guess we’re under arrest?” he asked me.

I grinned. “No, you’re free to come and go as you choose. But behave, or when I find my dog, she’ll call her friends on you, and trust me, that’s not comfortable.”

Apparently, Moaner and Ebola had encountered something of that already, as they unconsciously rubbed their butts and legs at this comment.

I made a light, and we went in search of my missing troupe.

Moaner grabbed my arm as we started out the door.

“Look, sorry about all that before” he said, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. Behind him, Boneshear rolled his eyes and muttered something under his breath. I couldn’t hear it, but I caught the scent of a man in desperate need of a root canal, and some mint mouthwash.

I could figure out what he was unhappy about, though.

“Don’t worry about that Moaner” I said, “You’re not the first, won’t be the last.

“And Boneshear” I continued, “No, I haven’t tricked or entranced anybody.”

Boneshear sneered. ”Right. And blood-drinking giants always apologize to people for being rude.”

“Yeah, sometimes they do” I answered. “Anyway, it’s nothing to you if Moaner wants to be polite, is it?”

“Maybe not” admitted Boneshear, ”but it’s strange and then some. I don’t like it!”

I shrugged, and Rector laughed.

“What do you like, you old cudgel, that doesn’t involve hurting someone smaller and slower than yourself?” he demanded.

Boneshear didn’t answer.For a while we said nothing, but there was no chance we could be called silent. Besides the thunder of our feet, Moaner and Slowdeath were mouth breathers, and loud at it.

“So Rector” I asked, “What’s up with the names? Normally I don’t want to pray all that much, but I notice your name is a bit different from your companions.

“Well, it’s like this, Dan” said Rector, ignoring Boneshear’s vigorously swinging head in a an attempt to shut him up. ”We sort of lost our original names when we were sent down here, and we had to choose new ones.”

“Really?” I asked.

“Yes” said Rector.

”So, I went for class, and these others went for intimidation.”

“So, why aren’t they happy about you telling me?” I asked Rector.

Rector chuckled.“With our size, intimidation was already a given, and the names just invite trouble from some of the really bad locals.” he explained.

“Hmmm, someone worse than you guys?” I asked.I heard a groan from behind me. Slowdeath looked like he wanted to cry.

“We’re not going there, are we?” he whimpered, a strange thing to see in a giant.I shrugged . “Guess so” I said. “If Arf isn’t here, it’s because she found something even bigger and meaner to fight, so that’s where we go looking.”I heard a patter of what sounded like rain, as everyone moved away from Slowdeath.

Boneshear glared at him, then me.“I hope you’re happy. You made a giant pee his pants. Should I be impressed?”

“Does he do that often?” I asked Rector.

“No” answered Rector, ”Giants never pee themselves, although in this case I can understand why.”

“Well” I answered, “you don’t have to come along, but I’m going after my dog.”

“We’re coming” announced Rector. ”I have a feeling if we don’t come with you, we won’t get another chance.“Anybody else need to relieve themselves, before we go on?” he asked the group.

No one answered Rector, and I wasn’t sure if he was serious or taunting.The passage went black, even with my sword shining out in front of us. As I was about to ask Rector what that could mean, I heard Boneshear and Slowdeath mutter oaths. Rector nodded.

“Yeah, we’re in for it.” Rector faced me directly. “Daniel, I hope you’re as good as I figured you to be, or things are about to get very, very unpleasant for us all.”

“We’ll be all right” I assured the group, though I don’t think I sounded all that confident. I reached back into my pack and asked the group, “Weapons?”

A chorus of laughing and knuckles cracking answered me.

“Naw, they just get in the way” said Boneshear. ”I like to feel the action!”

We felt a presence, cold and malevolent, and the laughing stopped. “How long do we have?” I asked Rector.

“Seconds, not even a minute” he answered in a low voice.

“Well.” I said. “What need I know about these?”

“No names” began Rector, speaking quickly, ”They home in on identities, and love to seek out weaknesses.“They can be beaten, but they are very tough, and each must be beaten in a way different from the others in its group.

“They use a sort of magic, that is, a power source from somewhere beyond themselves, and if pressed, they will call upon it for strength, defense, or escape.”

I felt something nip at my neck, and realized it was time.I spoke a Word, and the immediate area exploded into light and music for a few seconds. I looked around, and the passage had returned to its normal dimness, but I could see. The giants were still with me, but all had been knocked to the ground.

Boneshear was annoyed, but Rector was surprised. “Nice of you to shove us all down like that!” protested Boneshear, but no one answered him.

“That’s not supposed to work on them!” exclaimed Rector.

I shrugged.“That’s why you try things” I said, “But I think they’ll be back in a little bit. Maybe more angry.”

“Then why did you do that?” asked Rector.“Because I needed to try it, and besides” I said, “It would be poor manners not to introduce myself.”

Rector grinned.“There is that” he admitted. Laughing, he pulled his companions to their feet.

“Imagine that!” he cried to them, ”they will think we are with the righteous!”None of the others laughed.My sword began to flash, and turned a deep red, almost burgundy. I wondered if I should have asked for a User’s Manual earlier.

I felt the air grow cold again, and it seemed a shade darker. My sword, a deep beet red, turned brighter on its right edge, and I felt it pull that way, so I let it turn.

SNIK! rang out the sword, and something heavy but invisible fell to the ground, with a loud crackling in the air, with tiny sparks showering from the sword. I felt the sword pull me over to my left, and lunge as a breeze warned of another approach by the demon.
SNIK-SNIK! I felt more than heard, as the sword arced itself around, cutting twice more into my unseen opponent. It is more than a little strange, to not be able to see what’s happening, yet still believe you are winning.For my companions, however, it was not so easy. Like my opponent, their enemies were unseen but fast and strong, and the sounds of violence and cries of pain let me know they were not faring well. Boneshear’s bravado was not sufficient to his boast. Rector was handling himself well, using a variant of Jujitsu I would have liked to watch, but my own bout kept me occupied. It was like Ballet, Tai Chi, and a Science Fiction movie all in one, my duel. The sword whirled and crackled, each stroke striking off something foul and heavy, but always moving on without respite.

Finally, with a heavy thud, something fell at my feet, and I knew my foe had fallen. I had no time to cheer, as I immediately felt Moaner’s opponent come after me. Without thinking, I raised my sword, but I knew things were different with this one, as the sword did not direct itself, and I felt it strike without effect, as if it had lost its edge. I hard shove threw me down to the ground, and my sword clattered off to the side. Something heavy landed on me, and my breath blew hard from me.As I struggled with the enemy, I began to worry that I was having difficulty breathing. I heard a chorus of hoarse cries and shouts, and began to wonder if we had all fallen under the same onslaught. Then I suddenly recognized the cries of the hounds.I rallied my strength, and shoved my hoary foe off from me, and rolled quickly to my left, hearing him fall back down to where I had been. Apparently, I had a slight edge for agility.

I looked to the room, and saw Arf and a pack of hounds in white –Tearing at the giants who had accompanied me.

”Arf! No!” I cried, “The giants are with me!

“Our enemy is unseen!”

Arf cocked her head and looked at me askance.“You promised I could fight a Nephilim!” she complained.

“Maybe later” I said, “if they don’t behave, you can chew them up. “But right now, there’s demons to fight!”

“Where?” demanded Arf, ”I don’t see them anywhe-“ then stopped as one of the invisible enemy hit her.

“Ohooooooooooooooooo!” shouted Arf, ”Plaaaaaaytiiiiiimme!”And the pack turned on the demons.

And just as suddenly, I and the Nephilim were free.

Chapter Ten: Fowls in Foul Places

2004-11-25T21:34:00.000-08:00

The Nephilim and I watched Arf and her companions demolish the spirits with an ease I did not expect. I looked over at Rector, and he shrugged.

“I guess they weren’t expecting a pack of hounds” he answered, straightening his back and adjusting his shoulderblade with a mild ‘click’, as cartilage and bone slipped back into place. Boneshear chuckled at the sound.

“That reminds me” he smiled, ”We’ve got a rugby game on next week, if you’re interested.”

I smiled back.

“Have to wait and see on that, Boneshear” I said, “It depends on what happens down here, what my schedule will look like.”

Moaner was trying to follow the action between the blur of the pack and the invisible demons. Maybe he could perceive something I was missing. Slowdeath started giggling, and the others edged away a little from him. Mauler and Ebola appeared to be wagering on the outcome.

By the time we had regained our breath, the hounds had finished with the demons. I noticed puddles of a foul-smelling yellow liquid I originally took for urine, but now concluded must be the demon’s blood. I wondered about the dogs’ taste; I would not have wanted any of that stuff in my mouth.

Arf bounded out of the pack, with what looked like a haunch of meat in her mouth.

“Hey Daniel!” she called out. ”Make a fire, I want to cook some lunch!”

The other hounds bayed in apparent agreement.

“Arf” I asked, “Where is the group?”

Arf chuckled.“Safe, don’t worry. I left them with the ducks!”

“Ducks?” I asked.

“Yup!” affirmed Arf. ”safe as if they were in Heaven itself!Uhhh, about that fire?”

As Arf started cooking her haunch with the help of Moaner, I saw Rector and Slowdeath dragging a net across the floor, and as it encountered things, they came into view. There appeared to be an assortment of weapons and small tools, with some other objects I couldn’t identify.

“These may be useful,” said Rector, ”but we’ll have to decontaminate them first.”

As he said this, Rector deposited the netful of items into a burlap sack, which he tightly tied closed. After she ate, Arf peered closely at Moaner, who began to whine and back away.

“No, Arf, that’s not necessary” I warned.Arf grinned at Moaner, then winked at me.

“Okay” she acquiesced, ”Just as long as there’s more fighting ahead”

I sighed. “Arf, what are you going to do, when it’s time to go back to Heaven, and you can’t fight anymore?”

Arf pondered the question for a moment, then grinned.“I’ll just worry about that when it’s time” she promised. ”Right now, we’re in hell, and that means action to me”

Boneshear laughed. ”If I knew your dog was like that,” he said, ”I’d have known you for a friend at the start!”

The Nephilim laughed, and we all got up to go.

As we walked along, the Nephilim noticed the pack of hounds had separated from each other, and now followed the giants closely, two or three hounds to each. Moaner glanced at me nervously, and I shot a look at Arf.

“Are you playing a joke, or do I need to remind you not to mess with the Nephilim?” I asked her.

Arf flipped her ear over her head loosely, and grinned back at me.

“Welllll, you promised me I could fight one” she said, ”and I just know they won’t all behave.

“When one of them slips up, we’ll be ready” she chuckled.

Slowdeath grunted cynically.“I thought you Christians were into peace and harmony” he sneered.

laughed. “We try to do that” I assured him, “but we’re not perfect. Besides, it’s my fault, partly: I never found a church, that would let me bring my dog.”

Slowdeath looked warily at the hounds at his heels.

“Don’t worry” I assured him, “they’re just messing with you. I now that look on Arf.”

“Spoilsport!” pouted Arf.

“Oh yeah, sure” I told her, “I know you’ll find something to amuse yourself. But right now, I want to find the rest of our group and get going again. Maybe there’s no schedule, but I get the feeling I’m running slow.”

Arf shrugged and padded on ahead. After a while, we heard what sounded like music and laughing, almost a casino. I groaned.“Arf, please tell me you didn’t leave them with a succubus!” I cried.

“They said they’d be nice” Arf protested. ”Seriously, I told you I left them with the ducks, and they’re fine, relax!”

I growled something under my breath, and looked in my pack for my Bible and some holy water. Deep inside, I knew this was trouble of a new sort.

We approached the merriment, and I observed to Arf, “It’s a good thing for you, we don’t anybody like Moses along on this trip” The message didn’t take with Arf, however, as she began to trot along in time to the music. Before we entered the opening, I stopped and pulled Rector to the side.

“I just realized”, I said to him, “that it appears these guys are using lights and power down here, which is not available anywhere else. You had mentioned magic a while back.

“How does that work in these situations?”

“Three ways” answered Rector, as he pulled out the netbag from the last battle. ”They could be using their own internal power, or some natural source, or they could have a host.”

“Host?” I asked.“Yes, and it’s what you’re thinking” said Rector, ”so we’ll have to be careful”

With a motion, and a muttered phrase, Rector shrank the Nephilim down to human size. Large humans, but much less imposing.

“That’s better” observed Rector, ”no sense advertising.”

I pulled a large basin form the backpack, and Rectos put some of the items in it. As I poured holy water over the collection, which hissed and steamed, I looked closely at Rector.

“What is the source of your magic, Rector?” I asked.

“Hell” replied Rector. ”We were granted some power for our defense, but if and when we leave Hell, we’re just some ugly, clumsy guys with no protection.

“I’m hoping you’ll still be looking after us at that point.”

“Me, or someone else Jesus sends” I assured him. Slowdeath and Moaner relaxed. Arf and Boneshear were jamming to the music, apparently unconcerned by any dangers or difficulties awaiting us.

We washed the rest of the items from our haul, and looked them over. Something suggested two of them to me, so took them and stuck them in my back waistband, and the rest went back into Rector’s gimme-bag, which seemed to be as adaptable as my knapsack. I made a mental note to look for furniture in them, the next time I needed a rest or to clean up.

We entered the mouth of the new tunnel, and I saw dazzling lights and heard blaring music. I half-expected to see a velvet rope and a bouncer. There was a hip-hop beat to the music, with a heavy bass which I surprised I hadn’t caught earlier; it seems hell muffles sounds somewhat. As my eyes adjusted to the conditions, I saw that Arf was right – our group was all there, although they had spaced out somewhat from each other, and the place was loaded with waterfowl. Ducks of course, but also geese, pelicans, gulls and albatross, even some penguins over by the far wall. One of the ducks caught my eye, and he waddled over quickly.

“Ev’nin, gent” he began, ”This is a private party, but for a small consideration I’m sure –“

“The party is over” I said, cutting him short. As if on cue, the music stopped, and the lights rose to the level of a normal auditorium. The duck was not happy.

“Look, just because you don’t feel like having a-“ “I said, we’re done here.” I told the duck. Everyone was looking at me with some unhappiness; they couldn’t see why I was being this way.

“Listen up, everyone” I called out. “Everyone in my group, we’re leaving now.”

As I turned back to the doorway, I waved Rector over.

“What’s wrong?” asked Rector. I motioned him close, and spoke in a low voice.

“Trouble” I replied. “For now, take these flasks of Holy Water around, you’ll need them, and keep your weapons ready.”

The mood of the place was distinctly unhappy. Arf was particularly upset with me.

“I set up a nice place for R&R, and you don’t like it?” she demanded.

“Set it up yourself, or did you get help?” I asked. Arf stopped, looked puzzled for a moment, then worried.

“But they seemed so nice...” began Arf, but a black shape caught my eye, and I pulled my sword quickly.

“Ware the penguin!” I called out, and we were at it again.

Frankly, I hadn’t expected to be at a disadvantage, should I need to fight waterfowl, even formally-dressed avians. But when the penguin struck me, well, amidships, I lost my footing and my sword, which skittered away on the rocky ground. The penguin began to pummel me quickly about the face, and I tried to roll away on my side. Another two penguins quickly arrived, and they began to kick at me and stomp, hissing all the while. In the distance, I noticed Miss Precept watching us fight, and smiling. I started to speak a Word, but one of the penguins realized what I was about and kicked dirt into my mouth as I tried to speak. Off to my left, the place had become a general milieu, with the predictable barks of delight from Arf and her pack. I heard loud heavy noises I took to be the Nephilim, and I wondered idly who was winning. As one of the penguins kicked me in the groin, I decided I wasn’t. I saw an opening and kicked one of the penguins aside, jumping to my feet before the other two could close the gap. I then lept over the two, banging their heads together as I cleared them upside-down. I landed on my feet, and quickly locating my sword, dived for it ahead of my pursuers, spitting out dirt as they spat out curses. The room had separated rather neatly according to the types of combatants. Arf and her pack were taking on the ducks, who seemed to be wielding some sort of martial arts weapons. I made a mental note to watch out for Duck-chas and flying stars. The Nephilim were taking on the ostriches and flamingoes (and no, I have no idea when they showed up) . Most of the humans were left to deal with pigeons and parrots, and I had the penguins. For some reason, the Doctra was loose again, but no one was attacking it, and it seemed to have no desire to fight.

I saw my chance, and took it. I spoke a Word, and it reverbed within the room like the inside of a bell, knocking everyone to the ground but me and the Doctra. We all spent a few seconds clearing our heads, and everyone shot me a nasty look or two.

I heard a deep, heavy bass then, and turned to see the Doctra tuning up a Stratocaster. He put another pair of tentacles on the keyboard, winked, and as if on cue, the place erupted into fighting again, as the Doctra started belting out Sweet’s “Ballroom Blitz”…

… and things were going so well.

The fight was progressing nicely, and I actually began to believe I could plan something ahead of time for once. The Nephilim and the dogs were doing well for themselves, and the humans appeared to have the advantage of their foes. The Doctra was rocking the place, and it seemed apropos of the moment.“…the man in the back said ‘everyone attack’, and it turned into a ballroom blitz…” sang out the parrots, as I spun a mace across a penguin, knocking him into another one as I followed through.“…and the girl in the corner said ‘boy I wanna warn ya…”I almost sang along as I riposted a sword-wielding mallard. I was having fun now, and began to understand a little of Arf’s berserker joy. A voice in the back of my mind warned me there was something very wrong with enjoying yourself in hell, but I quieted that voice impatiently. After all, things were going just –

The room fell pitch black and silent. Everyone stopped at the same moment, and a chill feeling of dread fell upon us all. I opened my mouth to ask what was happening from Rector, but I couldn’t speak.For how long this continued, I could not say, but the feeling grew deeper, as if I had missed some important deadline, as if I was about to discover some unforgivable error. I could not speak, could not move, could do nothing but bear the weight of something coming. Even in the darkness, I could tell we all felt it.After more time, my eyes began to burn, even though I could see nothing. I wondered what was irritating them, then realized that they had detected a light approaching, which even at this distance I knew to be no ordinary flame or lamp.

With nothing else to occupy my attention, I watched the light approach, and realized it was swiftly to be upon us. I also realized it was not one light, but many, as if an army of blazing glory was on its way. I suddenly realized that I could be in very big trouble.As the light came fast upon us, I glanced to my side, and was surprised to realize that I could still see no one else around me, as if I were alone with this approaching nemesis. My unease increased again. I suddenly realized that I was unarmed, and all my possessions removed from me. My clothes were returned to a dull brown, with mud and soil in various places.The room was suddenly filled with light and sound as they arrived. I could distantly hear sounds of direction and movement, as the angels (for that’s what they were, fierce warrior angels with faces like polished brass, and visages hard and stern) moved busily about. I could not speak, and they seemed to have no words for me. It seemed the room was being cleared, everyone directed to their next destination; the humans and the Nephilim for judgment, the animals to someplace else. I waited patiently to be freed from my paralysis and mute confinement.But that time did not come. After a time, the troop of angels seemed satisfied with their work, and as if they neither saw nor heard me, they herded everyone out (I could still not see them, but could hear them move away into the distance), then as my vision suddenly returned fully, I caught a last glimpse of the one who seemed in charge, closing the doorway after him, blotting out all light and sound, except that I heard a sound, which I knew with despair was sealing of the passageway.

And there they left me, unable to move or speak, imprisoned alone in hell.

When enough time passes, it ceases to have meaning. Accordingly, when time is used as an element of punishment or rebuke, there is the need to tend to the sense of time, for ennui to be replaced with dread, with a sense of apprehension and foreboding, so that the subject may be properly drawn to the desired sense.So it was, that even sealed within a vault of reproach and rejection, I was not completely removed from awareness of what went on. A thousand thousand footfalls and muted murmurs made their way in the distance, of range unknown and purpose undiscovered. And I was left to guess at the meaning and purpose of each small moment. There in the still ominous dark, I heard sounds which may or may not have occurred, saw things which may of may not have been there, the off-black wisps of something between imagination and dim existence, and in that space I caught some sense of myself, real and not-so.

Then the child was there. I had neither seen nor heard him enter, and indeed, so far as I could perceive, he was just

– there –

of a moment, as if he had been there all along these many days and I had simply missed him. There was not any sort of light, that I could be sure of his age or appearance, but somehow I knew him of a form, well enough to know that I was in the company of a small male child, possessed (both of us) with a curiosity of the moment.

“What are you doing?” he asked.

I had no answer for him. I was not truly sure that my mind had not taken that turn beyond the bend of reason’s grasp, and neither my ears nor eyes seem able to quite focus on the boy.

“What are you doing?” the child repeated, and somehow I was a little more sure that he was really there, had really spoken, and I was expected to answer. Yet I could not bring myself to speak.Time passed, and for long while neither of us said anything. My mind raced through possibilities and alternatives, but none of them satisfactory as a choice I might choose.

“What are you doing?” he asked again, and this time I found my voice, because I knew Who asked me.

“I am stuck in a pit of my own making” I replied. “I’m sorry.”

“Well enough” replied Jesus, “You really got off the job there, brother. Keep that in mind as you meet others who have also fallen off the road.”

“So, what do I do now?” I asked.

Jesus pointed ahead, where now the way was clear and open.

“Back on the clock, dude. You got people waiting.”

We walked out into the open hallway, and I was struck by how clean and quiet it was. The 'kim-chi-gone-really-bad' smell was gone, too, and I looked over at Jesus.

He shrugged.

"I don't want or need to put up with anything which does not serve My purpose." He explained. "Of course, you'll have to deal with the sights and smells and everything when you're back on your own, but for now, I thought you should avoid those distractions.

"There's time for a short talk" He said, gesturing to a table and two chairs that appeared, complete with tea service.

Jesus seemed to recognize I didn't know what to say, so He continued.

"You know, Daniel," He said (using my stone-name), "a lot of people like to talk about God and faith and morality as if they had it all sorted out. But one of the reasons I didn't take people to the Kingdom right after they believed in Me, is because it is a journey, the never-ending kind. Even people who followed me for over a hundred years don't know all there is to know of even human wisdom, let alone My mysteries.

"So, don't feel too badly, that you haven't been able to do everything you want or meant to. You're still new at this, especially this sort of mission.

"On the other hand, if you're going to do My work, you're going to have to focus on Me, not your own ego, not even your dog, though I am fond of her also.

"Remember, you can always call on Me, and I will be there to help you do My will, but I will not encourage error or wrong. Okay?"

"Yes Sir", I answered.

Jesus laughed."C'mon, dude, it's a good thing, I promise.

"And you know I always keep my promises."

I found myself relieved, enough so that I asked a question my curiosity had piqued

Lord," I began, "Forgive me if it's not my business, but is there a reason you look less like the paintings in church, and a bit more like Keanu Reeves right now?"

Jesus chuckled.

"Well, blame Pat Morita for that."I have sort of a lull until it's time to close things up for this old earth, and Pat reminded me about the whole 'wax on, wax off' thing. So, while I wait for you and some other of my slower servants to do My work, I'm practicing my surfing."

Jesus grinned.

"You know, until yesterday, I'd never drank a Hurricane, or waxed down a board.

"Next week, maybe I'll try para-sailing!"

I watched the Lord of the Ages walk away in a fading light, and I realized (as the chair beneath me vanished) that I was about to be on my own again. So I called out:

"Lord, how do I find my companions?"

"Don't worry!" He called back. "I'm sending them to you."As He disappeared into the darkness, I realized that there had been Marimba music as well, which was now replaced by the distant screams of torment. And the heat, the dank, and the smells were all back as well.Back to work.Looking at my feet, I found my backpack and put it on. I noticed my jumpsuit was a uniform grey, not from dirt but as if it was designed so. Just as well. Elvis could carry off the act for years, but I got tired of it after only a little while.I chose a direction, and trudged off to find my companions, and the penguins of Hades.

I entered the new tunnel, and after looking both ways, shrugged and headed aimlessly ahead.

Almost immediately, I sensed a short presence approaching me. I hoped it would be Arf, but I was wrong.

"Allo, gov'ner" called out the duck I had seen at the fight which the angels had abruptly ended. "You, uhhh, wouldn't happen to know where I could find that band, would you now? Especially the Doctra."

"Sorry, pal" I replied, "I've sort of been out of things for a while."

The duck shrugged.

"Figures", he commented. "As soon as those angels showed up, I should have known they'd take anything good. You know, I was this close to signing Clapton to a concert tour down here, but his son came down and got 'im."

"Do tell?" I asked.

"Oh, sure" said the duck, "Every time something pretty cool shows up here, some angel or heavenly emissary comes along and takes 'em on up to see the Guy On High.

"It's getting, so a hard-working entrepreneur like meself just can't get ahead."

I grinned, despite myself.

"Sorry about the fracas" I said, "But you should have known better about those penguins."

"I know, I know" said the duck. "Sure, they dress well, and the ladies like them, but they sure always seem to cause trouble.

"By the way, I'm Nick."

"Daniel" I replied. "So, none of my business, but what got you sent down to hell?"

Nick sighed."That's a long story, I'm sad to say." he said. "I sure hope me mum never finds out I came to this!"

"Well, I might be able to help a little, on that matter" I said.

"Say, you wouldn't happen to know where my dog got to, would you?"

Nick shuddered."I remember those teeth" he said, "and not much else.

"If she shows up, please keep me away from those teeth, OK?"

"I promise" I said, and as we marched ahead, the lighting seemed to improve just a bit, although the smell remained as foul - er, rank, as ever.

Chapter Eleven: The Other Side of Judgment

2004-11-25T02:06:00.000-08:00

As we walked along, a noise of furious anger and rage filled the hallway.Nick trembled a bit, and looked up at me.

"Are we about to be attacked?" he asked.

"No, not here, anyway" I replied. "Over on one of the other threads, someone who wants his jesus to be bigger than someone else's jesus, is playing 'thumper' again."

"Does that happen often?" asked Nick.

"Depends" I said. "If someone egocentric and insecure gets started on a doctrinal kick, they can get pretty rowdy.

"Especially on a Monday."

"Ah, I see." answered Nick, and we moved on.

As we walked along, a thought occurred to me.

"Hey Nick" I said, and the duck craned his head over curiously. "You ever read the Bible?"

The duck shrugged.

"Bits of it, here and there. Why?" he asked.

"You ever read about Moses and the Burning Bush?"

"Yeah, I think so." answered Nick. "Why, you see one coming up ahead?"

"No" I replied. "It just hit me, though. You suppose God was trying to get through to Moses, and we humans being so stubborn, it took a flaming shrubbery to get his attention?"

Nick chuckled."Like, 'Can you hear me now', in 2000 B.C." laughed Nick.

Off in the distance, something like thunder rolled.

"I thought 'e 'ad a sense of humor" muttered Nick.

"I don't think that was God" I answered.

"Great", replied Nick. "Then we're in the bowels of hell, and it's getting diarrhea!"

I tried vainly to keep that mental image away.

"By the way, mate" chirped Nick, "any plans for lunch?"

He laughed at the look I gave him.

At the same moment, a feeling of dark dread crept over us both. I knew Nick felt it too, because he suddenly spoke up

Ummmmm, mate, I think maybe I should have warned you, that I have a few enemies down here."

"Uh-huh" I answered, "Like someone who creates an aura of doom, maybe?"

"uhhhhhh, yeah, something like that." said Nick, and suddenly my backpack became much heavier. I stopped and reached in to see what that was, and discovered a large sword, scabbard and shield. I had mixed feelings about that; it's nice to have necessary items dropped in, but if I needed weapons, I was in trouble. And besides, I though Arf was supposed to get all the fighting.

Something heavy fell in the distance, like a giant approaching. I heard metal-shod feet slam into the rock, and as I turned to Nick to ask if he knew who it might be, something dark and terrible broke through the left wall ahead of us, and stepped into our way.The creature was four times my height, and smelled like a latrine long untended. Smoke rose from his red eyes, and he grinned, displaying three rows of sharp yellow teeth, with red meaty strands hanging from them. He also carried a heavy mace, bloody with red pulp. He wore black armor with profane words and phrases written across his torso and chest.

The demon grunted and gestured at Nick with his mace.

"I'm here for the duck" he hissed. Nick cowered behind my legs.

I cocked my head.

"Are you sure you wouldn't want a nice Reuben sandwich?" I suggested.

The demon spat at me, missing by a couple feet. I stared at the hissing rock where it landed.I sighed and hefted my sword and shield, willing myself to match the demon's size.

Where did my dog get to, I wondered, as we collided.

Jesus once said, when speaking to His disciples, 'Where your treasure is, there will you heart be, also'. And when your dog's favorite exercise is a good fight, you should know she won't be far from the fray.

Just as we made contact, and I spoke a Word, there was a hard slam backwards, and I fell to my side, as the demon was likewise slammed down towards the wall, the profane script on his chestplate shimmering and fading from the impact of the holy word.There was a tearing noise behind the demon, and as he rose, he reached back to see what had attacked him. For a moment, I thouhg Nick was showing some uncommon bravery, but in a flash it realized Arf had returned. And she had the penguins with her. Unfortunately, the demon now had allies with him, smaller but just as mean, and a melee seemed imminent. So I spoke another Word, having braced myself this time, and as the force rebounded about the walls, everyone but me held their ears and fell to the floor. I noticed the script on the demon's breastplate had even been altered to, "Won't you be my neighbor?", and in places the steel had changed to cardigan.

The demon was not happy with the change.

"Arrrrrrgh!" he screamed, and Nick chuckled.

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh, I'm really liking this change of events" he laughed, and the demon tried vainly to rise. He seemd to be stuck to the cave floor. Arf was grinning, but I didn't know why, yet.

"Hey Arf", I called out. "How's tricks?"

"Funny you should ask that," replied Arf.

"Did you know they make Holy Bubble GumTM?"

"For real?"

"Yup" affirmed my pooch, "And you can do tricks with it, too."

"Ah." I said, nodding. "Like sticking demons' butts to the floors of caves?"

"Among other things" agreed Arf.

Everyone had settled down, more of less, and I noticed my Sword and Shield had become a Bible and Concordance. I got the idea.

"OK, everyone get comfortable" I announced. "Time for Bible Study."

Arf grinned, Nick looked mildly curious, the demon shrieked as if he had been impaled, and a couple of the smaller demons appeared to have soiled themselves. A good audience.

"THIS is not fair!" roared the demon. "I was told there would be a great conflict!"

"Maybe", I said to him, "It's just not the sort of conflict you expected, but it will be great, nonetheless"

"ARRRRGH!!" replied the demon, and Nick rolled his eyes.

"Quite the conversationalist, aren't yew?" he asked the demon.

"Listen Gov, not that I mind a good sermon, but what is the plan here, exactly?"It's not as if Smelly from Helly here" - Nick nodded at the bound demon, whose breastplate had now turned purple, and script flowed across it, reading 'I wuv you, You wuv me...' - "is going to change religions, now is he? Or any of his lot, either", gesturing back at the other demons caught in thrall.

"To each, his own" I answered Nick. There's a reason for everything, so yeah, there's a reason for this, also.

"Let's begin with Ephesians 4:9 . "What does "He ascended" mean, except that He also descended to the depths of the earth". What's your name, demon lord?" I asked the bound monster, whose breastplate had now turned pink, with a cartoon animal on it's center.The demon responded with a sound like a drunk man retching and cursing at the same time.

"OK, then, I'm going to call you Chuck" I said."Are you interested in Salvation?"

'Chuck' stared at me, incredulous. "Do you really think that there is anything but torment in wait for me?" he demanded.

"Why not?" I asked him. "Jesus came to Earth for all men" I reminded him.Chuck glared at me.

"I am not a man" he retorted."John 3:18" I said, "Whoever believes in Him is not condemned"

Nick kicked my shin. "Pardon me, Gov, but that's a reeeeeeeal bad idea, that one. I don't think God would like you offering His pardon to the very ones tormenting humans and animals alike all these years."

"People change", I reminded Nick. "Why not Chuck here?"

Chuck stared at me, but his malice had faded. "You can't be serious" he breathed, "or else you're a blind fool. "Nothing can change for the damned."

I winked."Not until you try, at least" I remarked. "Look, you figure you're looking at eternal torment and punsihment, right?"The infernal crowd nodded, almost as one."All right then, any chance of getting better than that is better than just taking the worst possibe case, isn't it?"Stunned by the notion, the demons stared silently for a few moments, absorbing the notion that there could be Hope for them, too."Ummmmmm, what sort -" one of them croaked - "what sort of judgment do you think we might get, if, we, well, if we switch sides?"

Now that he had voiced the notion, the crowd suddenly realized that the Evil One might not approve of their defection, and they panicked. Unable to stand, they nonethless began to shriek and cower, as if any moment their fell master might arrive.

"Switching teams won't be enough." I warned them. "You would have to repent for every evil thing you ever did, said, or thought, and accept the Lord Jesus Christ as your King, for ever and ever without condition or restriction.

"You would also have to face judgment, for even though he forgives, even in His Mercy there is Justice."

Seeing Despair in their faces, I added, "but there is Hope with Him, where it can be no where else be found."

No one said anything for a long time. Then Chuck quietly nodded, reached to his sides and released his pink-and-purple-pola-dotted breastplate and tutu, and kicked his mace to the wall

"I'm in." he said. "Teach me to pray."

As others made their decisions, nodding in agreement or shaking their dissent, I saw the walls on either side begin to change, one brightening, the other darkening. I knew we'd have a big audience in a couple moments.I said the Lord's Prayer about as fast as I ever had.

Oddly enough, for once everyone seemed to be acting in character. The demons were angry, Nick was trying to hide behind me, and I was far less sure of my position than I put on. For all of that, I found it strange to consider just how easily I accepted the apparent collision between Absolute forces between which I found myself. Thinking back to my last conversation with my Lord, I wondered if I would be sent back into solitary for a longer time to consider my errors. I was not, at least, worried that it might offend God to offer His Grace to anyone who might take it, even the very fallen angels who predated Man’s own existence. I briefly wondered if ‘Chutzpah’ was sufficient for that degree of presumption.

When the walls flashed into openings as I expected, I saw that they were resolved differently from each other. To the right, I saw a glorious shining host, arrayed for battle with bright armor and dressed in white linen. To the left, I saw a dark host, but they could not battle, as they were all of them chained to the ground, already restrained as they had apparently already been defeated. I wondered at the purpose of this pass.

Heralds entered our space from either side. The dark emissary was chained as the others, but with a length which allowed her entry into the room. I knew her as a former politician of great fame, charisma and influence, but no integrity. The bright emissary from the other side was my wife, Mikki, who greeted me with a bright smile as she walked in. The two heralds stood side by side, each facing me as advocates before a judge, but ignoring each other.

“May it please the court” began the Senator, and I actually turned my head and looked behind me, before I realized she meant me, “there is no jurisdiction here. All here from hell, to hell belong.

“Suffice them to their torment.”

Mikki laughed at that.

“Hello again, Daniel” she began, “I’m not going to ask how you got this group together, but I have been told to say to you, that you are the arbiter here. Your decision has consequences, but will be accepted as binding.

“What is your judgment for these here?”

I had not, to be honest, thought the matter through, but I suddenly recalled the remonstration from Paul, that we believers would one day judge angels, and it suddenly seemed, strange and out of place as it was, that I did indeed have that authority. I immediately prayed a quick request for wisdom and direction, then found my voice.

"Ah." I said, nodding. "Like sticking demons' butts to the floors of caves?"

"Among other things" agreed Arf. Everyone had settled down, more of less, and I noticed my Sword and Shield had become a Bible and Concordance. I got the idea.

"OK, everyone get comfortable" I announced. "Time for Bible Study." Arf grinned, Nick looked mildly curious, the demon shrieked as if he had been impaled, and a couple of the smaller demons appeared to have soiled themselves. A good audience.

"THIS is not fair!" roared the demon. "I was told there would be a great conflict!"

"Maybe", I said to him, "It's just not the sort of conflict you expected, but it will be great, nonetheless"

"ARRRRGH!!" replied the demon, and Nick rolled his eyes.

"Quite the conversationalist, aren't yew?" he asked the demon. "Listen Gov, not that I mind a good sermon, but what is the plan here, exactly?"It's not as if Smelly from Helly here" - Nick nodded at the bound demon, whose breastplate had now turned purple, and script flowed across it, reading 'I wuv you, You wuv me...' - "is going to change religions, now is he? Or any of his lot, either.", gesturing back at the other demons caught in thrall.

"To each, his own" I answered Nick. There's a reason for everything, so yeah, there's a reason for this, also. "Let's begin with Ephesians 4:9 . "What does "He ascended" mean, except that He also descended to the depths of the earth". What's your name, demon lord?" I asked the bound monster, whose breastplate had now turned pink, with a cartoon animal on it's center. The demon responded with a sound like a drunk man retching and cursing at the same time.

"OK, then, I'm going to call you Chuck" I said. "Are you interested in Salvation?"

'Chuck' stared at me, incredulous. "Do you really think that there is anything but torment in wait for me?" he demanded.

"Why not?" I asked him. "Jesus came to Earth for all men" I reminded him. Chuck glared at me. "I am not a man" he retorted.

"John 3:18" I said, "Whoever believes in Him is not condemned"

Nick kicked my shin. "Pardon me, Gov, but that's a reeeeeeeal bad idea, that one. I don't think God would like you offering His pardon to the very ones tormenting humans and animals alike all these years."

"People change", I reminded Nick. "Why not Chuck here?" Chuck stared at me, but his malice had faded.

"You can't be serious" he breathed, "or else you're a blind fool.

"Nothing can change for the damned."

I winked. "Not until you try, at least" I remarked.

"Look, you figure you're looking at eternal torment and punsihment, right?" The infernal crowd nodded, almost as one.

"All right then, any chance of getting better than that is better than just taking the worst possibe case, isn't it?" Stunned by the notion, the demons stared silently for a few moments, absorbing the notion that there could be Hope for them, too.

"Ummmmmm, what sort -" one of them croaked - "what sort of judgment do you think we might get, if, we, well, if we switch sides?"

Now that he had voiced the notion, the crowd suddenly realized that the Evil One might not approve of their defection, and they panicked. Unable to stand, they nonethless began to shriek and cower, as if any moment their fell master might arrive.

"Switching teams won't be enough." I warned them. "You would have to repent for every evil thing you ever did, said, or thought, and accept the Lord Jesus Christ as your King, for ever and ever without condition or restriction.

"You would also have to face judgment, for even though he forgives, even in His Mercy there is Justice." Seeing Despair in their faces, I added, "but there is Hope with Him, where it can be no where else be found."

No one said anything for a long time. Then Chuck quietly nodded, reached to his sides and released his pink-and-purple-pola-dotted breastplate and tutu, and kicked his mace to the wall.

"I'm in." he said. "Teach me to pray."

As others made their decisions, nodding in agreement or shaking their dissent, I saw the walls on either side begin to change, one brightening, the other darkening. I knew we'd have a big audience in a couple moments.

I said the Lord's Prayer about as fast as I ever had. Oddly enough, for once everyone seemed to be acting in character. The demons were angry, Nick was trying to hide behind me, and I was far less sure of my position than I put on. For all of that, I found it strange to consider just how easily I accepted the apparent collision between Absolute forces between which I found myself. Thinking back to my last conversation with my Lord, I wondered if I would be sent back into solitary for a longer time to consider my errors. I was not, at least, worried that it might offend God to offer His Grace to anyone who might take it, even the very fallen angels who predated Man’s own existence. I briefly wondered if ‘Chutzpah’ was sufficient for that degree of presumption.

When the walls flashed into openings as I expected, I saw that they were resolved differently from each other. To the right, I saw a glorious shining host, arrayed for battle with bright armor and dressed in white linen. To the left, I saw a dark host, but they could not battle, as they were all of them chained to the ground, already restrained as they had apparently already been defeated. I wondered at the purpose of this pass. Heralds entered our space from either side. The dark emissary was chained as the others, but with a length which allowed her entry into the room. I knew her as a former politician of great fame, charisma and influence, but no integrity. The bright emissary from the other side was my wife, Mikki, who greeted me with a bright smile as she walked in. The two heralds stood side by side, each facing me as advocates before a judge, but ignoring each other.

“May it please the court” began the Senator, and I actually turned my head and looked behind me, before I realized she meant me, “there is no jurisdiction here. All here from hell, to hell belong.

“Suffice them to their torment.”

Mikki laughed at that. “Hello again, Daniel” she began, “I’m not going to ask how you got this group together, but I have been told to say to you, that you are the arbiter here. Your decision has consequences, but will be accepted as binding.

“What is your judgment for these here?”

I had not, to be honest, thought the matter through, but I suddenly recalled the remonstration from Paul, that we believers would one day judge angels, and it suddenly seemed, strange and out of place as it was, that I did indeed have that authority. I immediately prayed a quick request for wisdom and direction, then found my voice.

I stood, finding myself robed as courtroom judges are. “I begin with the demon I refer to, as Chuck” I intoned. Chuck, looking relieved that I had not used the name he had originally used for himself, rose.

“Chuck, you have a long and evil history of actions and intentions. Why should I believe you have changed?”

“Well, because I have” assured Chuck. He had been smiling slightly, but realized he was not at all in the clear.

“I have no doubt you know, better than most, what waits for the damned” I said. Chuck stared back, stone-faced. “But I also have promised you the chance for mercy” I continued, “so the question before me is, what is the best way to determine where your heart lies now?”

“What, had you your freedom, would you do with it?” I asked him.

Chuck started to speak, but then stopped, and stared at the ground for a moment. “In all honesty,” he answered, “it wouldn’t be long before I went back to what I did before.” He said.

“It’s not like I want to do that, but if I’m going to be honest, that’s what would happen. Even if I got another chance, I’d blow it.”

“Well said” I replied, which stunned the audience.

“If you had pretended anything else, Chuck” I explained, “I’d have suspected you were hiding your true intent.

“Anyone who truly wants to change, worries they’ll fail. If you want to receive God’s Grace as He prepared it for Man, you must be able to live as men do. Do you understand what I mean?”

Chuck dropped his jaw, and said nothing at first. Then, faintly, he answered, “I do.”

“And are you willing,” I continued, “to accept that condition in order to receive the other?”

“But I will have nothing, nothing at all to start.” said Chuck.

“Indeed” I agreed. “Like a man whose house has burned down, and he has escaped with nothing but his life.”

A few moments passed, while Chuck absorbed that thought. Then he nodded.

“And there are consequences, for what you did” I warned him. “You must pay back everyone you wronged.”

Chuck gulped, but nodded again.

“Be it so.” I said, and in a shimmer, Chuck was transformed from a powerful demon into a rather small and unimpressive man. But his face radiated joy, as he ran towards the host in white.

“Don’t forget,” I called after him, “this is the Millenium, not the Eternity.

“Fail here, and there is no hope!”

“I know!” he called back, “But for the first time in as long as I remember, I am able to try!”

Sitting back down, I surveyed the rest of the demons.

“OK,” I said, shaking my sleeves out, which caused a distant roll of thunder. In the back of my mind, I heard the Master chuckle.

“Who’s next?”

Chapter Twelve: The Weight Of Consequence

2004-11-24T21:03:00.000-08:00

"I object!" rang out, an angry cry which stopped everyone for a moment.

I looked at the Senator, and cocked my head. "On what grounds?" I asked.

"Free will." claimed the Senator. "That one made a binding choice a long time ago. Who are you, to try to change what was put in place eons ago?"

"Free will." I returned. "He, Whose Will set all Creation in motion, is able to place His favor where He pleases.

"If Man may be redeemed, who has chosen so badly, why not anyone else on whom He chooses His Grace?

"Besides, I’m the guy with the gavel here. Objection over-ruled." I tapped the gavel, and a small chime rang, as if in acknowledgement of my decision.

The Senator made a face. I found a bottle of laxatives and tossed them at her.

"OK, next case. How ‘bout you?" I asked a foul-looking fellow.

"Sure, if I don’t have to pay for my history, I’m game." he said.

"Uhh, no." I answered. "It doesn’t work like that. You aren’t making a deal here or trying to skate.

"If you hold evil in your heart, it will destroy you. Only by turning your very heart and soul, can you find the hope I offer here."

"Yeah, yeah. So, I ‘promise’ I’ll be good. Cool?" said the demon, as he started to walk away.

"I’m afraid not." I said, and slapped the gavel down. Everyone froze.

"You’re not fooling anybody" I said. "You even still have the same demonic form.

"Besides, you don’t realize what you’re promising, here. Even the best-intentioned people wrestle with doing the right thing every time, all the time. In fact, it’s simply not possible by human strength alone. We all need help, and that means a relationship with God."

"Sooooo," sneered the Senator, rising again to her feet, "You let off the ones you want to let off, and you explain it by saying it’s because God plays favorites.

"And we’re supposed to just sit here and agree?"

"That’s not correct" I said. "First off, the ones I speak to will face a greater judgment, and it’s their heart that will make the choice, not my decision.

"Also, God provides hope for anyone who will have it. Don’t forget, you brought up Free Will, and that means no one is going to be dragged in Heaven, no one gets forced to choose the life of following the King in His work and will."

"But those who deny God get punished for it!" protested the Senator.

"Actually, what happens is that every choice has a consequence, and the judgment here just resolves some of the outstanding issues." I replied. "That’s part of why it’s so important for everyone in the Dock to be honest about their position.

"It’s not hurting anyone but themselves," I said, "to try to get around their condition here."

"Hmpf" said the Senator, and she dropped into her seat. Abruptly, everyone could move again, and the demon who had been trying to leave collapsed, and as he slowly climbed back to his feet, he gave me an angry look.

"OK, let’s try that again" I suggested. "I know you demons have foul names assigned to you, but here decorum is enforced. What name would you choose for this session?"

The demon smiled in a way that told me trouble was coming, and he opened his mouth as if to speak.

Then he started gagging. I knew what had happened right away.

"I warned you decorum would be enforced here" I said sternly. "Now swallow what you were going to say, and try a name suitable for this place."

The demon scowled at me. "John Doe" he finally said.

"Well, John" I said, "This is a unique sort of court. It’s not a court of human judgment, where errors about guilt may be expected to some degree, or where it is necessary to grant benefits because of doubt about what has been.

"This court stands, because all in the dock are guilty -"

"I object!" thundered the Senator, again.
"All are guilty" I asserted, "and the matter here is the condition of your heart and person. You can accept the course your deeds have set, with its attendant consequences, or you can ask for an alternative."

"Surrender or die" muttered the Senator. Mikki laughed at that.

"You know," she said to the room at large, "At first I didn’t know why the Senator was offended by our proceedings here. But I understand now, that those whose souls are not resolved, fear the unknown.

"Everything will be all right," she assured the Senator, "you don’t need to be afraid."

"Yeeeeaaaargh!!" yelled the Senator, and she lunged at Mikki. I slapped my gavel down hard, and again, everyone froze again.

I sighed.

I tapped the gavel again, and everyone relaxed.

"You see John?" I grabbed the chance to make a point. "It’s scary to have to face up to judgment, but we all have to do it sooner or later."

I was glad to see some of the people there nod their heads, but others stubbornly dissented. I saw the course, then.

"OK, everyone who has had their judgment with God, sit down." I said. Everyone in white sat down. The rest looked at me.

"All right, now for the rest of you." I said "It’s my place to judge you, but I’m really here to help you choose your course.

"You have two options, bascially. You can choose to go on as you have always done. For you here, that’s pretty grim, really. Every evil has its cost, and if you choose to stay evil, that cost is only going to get heavier and more painful, but it’s your choice.

"If you want to, you all have a chance to repent and turn back to God. I know how hard that sounds, but some here will have wanted such a chance, like Chuck did, and for them, that chance is here. That chance is now. But that chance is also up to you. I won’t pretend it’s easy, or even simple, especially when you have to decide ‘yes’ or ‘no’ right now, but it’s your choice and responsibility."

"So, I’m going to do this in stages. If you have already decided to reject this offer, just walk over to the dark side and join the others waiting for their resolution.

"If you choose to hear more, just sit down."

About a third of the group assembled who had been standing, walked over to the dark group in chains, and sat with them. The Senator glared at me, then silently left her post to join the dark group. I looked at Mikki, who shrugged.

"OK, everyone left, it’s time to take a moment and think about what you’ve done with the time and abilities given to you. Basically, if you had the chance to change things, would you? Humans always have things they wish they’d done different, but it’s hard for anyone to realize that it’s their character and being which chose their actions. I think the same thing applies for you here, also."

One of the guys (I noticed the group looked rather less fiendish than the group which had chosen to cross to the dark and the lost) spoke up:

"Look, to be straight with you, we’re all aware of the evil we’ve done. And we’re aware, more than most people, what that means in consequence.

"So, it’s fair to say that some of us might be interested in the offer because, well, we don’t want to get punished. From what you said, though, it’s not going to work out that way, so..."

"So you want to know if there really is hope for you, or whether this is a trick, say, because some of you played just such deceitful tricks on people yourselves?" I suggested.

"What’s your name, sir?" I asked. "That is, what will you be called for here?"

"I’ll go by Howard" he answered.

"Fine, Howard" I said. "Do you want to know the worst four-letter word out there, but one which a lot of people cling to?"

Howard didn’t answer.

"It’s the word ‘fair’." I continued. "If I told a hundred people about a situation, then asked what they thought was fair, it would be rare indeed if two of them agreed.

"So, when we’re talking about a judgment of a person’s being, well, no matter who makes the call or what is said, not very many people are going to call it ‘fair’. In human life, that’s just part of the world, but when it’s time to judge a person’s eternal resolution, it’s frankly beyond any mortal power to provide a just decision.

"The trouble most people have with God’s justice is, they are unwilling to accept His verdict either. In their hearts, they know He is perfectly just, the only being so, and He is also merciful well beyond human comprehension. In fact, some resent that God would be just when no human is truly so, and they cannot bring themselves to accept mercy from one who is Omnipotent.

"That’s part of why I am here now. You, like me, will have to face God and stand judgment, but there is an intermediary, God Himself and yet one of us. For you who are not human, it may be beyond your sufferance to face the Christ, so I am here because of that consideration. I am not your judge, yet I will be directed when necessary. The Lord is Omniscient, and that includes knowing what is needed here.

“With all this said, the question here and now is; how have you chosen?”

Howard looked very uncomfortable at that question, and said nothing for a while. I noticed, however, that as he considered the question, his horns receded and his claws became normal hands and feet for a man.

“Look at yourself, Howard” I suggested. As he did, I explained:

“As you know, God the Father made Man in His own image. When you who fell changed your visage and appearance, it was in defiance of God. So, when it’s all said and done, your decision is plain on its face, as well as your own.”

I saw a number of faces in the crowd start to melt at that, as they realized the matter before them. Some did not, however, becoming more angry and defiant, though they remained silent. Then one of them strode forward angrily.

“Look here”, he began. “There’s no way I’m bowing down to the likes of you” he declared.

“Fine” I answered, “That was never necessary, anyway.”

“You know what I mean” said the demon, “Just because God decides to take on the form of a human, you all get this idea you’re better than us.

“Well, you can send me to hell, but I’m not giving in!”

“That’s your choice” I agreed. “Go join the others, then, if you reject Mercy.” About a third of the remaining group slowly walked over to the group in chains. They stood there waiting.

“Maybe I’m just wasting my breath” I said to the whole audience, “but it needs saying, what it means to be in Heaven or Hell.

“If you choose hell, I can’t stop you. And if you think you can choose Heaven but stay selfish and mean, that will undo you also.

“But God did not make His creations out of a desire to see them hurt or destroyed. You have free will, yes, but you also have a chance for reconciliation, all of you, even now.

“You who have chosen to hate, believe that God uses His power as you would, but in truth, He has always chosen service over privilege, devotion over the ego.

“He did not become a Man, that men should become haughty, but to save men, to reach those who otherwise could not be found.

“The road either way has its hardship. To the one side, you have your will, but forsake the blessings of God. I do not know when that door will shut, but shut it will. To the other side, you must begin again, no matter what you had before, and it will be difficult, to do good in everything and all, but you have strength and direction and support at your call, without limit.

“Choose now!” I commanded, and everyone found themselves in one group or the other, the courtroom now empty except for me, Mikki, and Jesus, who clapped me on the back.

The walls closed quickly, with just time to hear Nick laughing and exclaim “I’m clean! I’m clean!” before the cave returned to its former condition.

“Not bad, Daniel” said Mikki, “Not bad at all”

“I agree” said Jesus. “You’re starting to get the feel for this.”

“OK” I nodded. “Now what?”

“Well, “ said Jesus, “Time for another mission, but in a different venue, I think.”

The cave in hell vanished, replaced by a green valley, of a place I did not recognize. Mikki smiled, as if she recognized it.

“You two aren’t married anymore,” said Jesus, “but I think you’ll work well together on this one.”

“What about Arf?” I asked.

Jesus laughed.

“She’s a bit too exuberant for this place, Dan.” He said.

“I’ve sent her on another mission, and this way you won’t get sidetracked quite so much.

“By now, I think you’re beginning to understand your place and the way of things.”

“I think so, “ I agreed. “But will I see Heaven, I mean, the real Kingdom?”

“In time.” promised Jesus. “But for now, I want you to get more used to doing My work, OK? You’ll see Talese and the others later, and you’ll see many places I have made ready for you, but for here and now, walk where I send you and say what I instruct, please.”

“Thy will be done” I agreed.

“That’s the idea” said Jesus, and He left us, Mikki and me, to walk on to the next place and purpose.